Is this acceptable behavior?

[Anonymous]

Guy would try and impress me and check me out obviously at school. Just found out he has a girlfriend. Stopped responding. Staring continues tho. I get men are attracted to diff women, but regularly staring is innapropriate and disrespectful. What do you all think?

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, that sucks that this dude was being shiesty with the obvious flirting while having a girlfriend. Red flag for sure. And I totally agree, the staring now is inappropriate.

A couple thoughts - some dudes really don't get social cues and respect boundaries. Being attentive to a taken girl's reactions just don't register. Like do they not see how creepy that is? Ugh.

As for the girlfriend, I'd be tempted to give her a head's up. Not to start drama, but just so she's aware of his behavior and can keep an eye out herself. No one should have to deal with a partner creeping on others.

If the staring continues, don't be afraid to call it out - like "is there something I can help you with?" Embarrass him a little and maybe he'll stop. You shouldn't have to feel uncomfortable!

Or tell a teacher you trust if it's at school. They can have a chat with him about respecting personal space. Don't let this guy get away with disrespect. Stand up for yourself, girl! You got this.

[Asker]

Hi! So the thing is he does not know that I know he has a girlfriend. His girlfriend goes to a diff school and I do not know who she is. It’s just I’ve completely stopped making eye contact. The staring continues tho. Thanks for your advice. It motivates me even more to act uninterested for her sake and in hopes that he matures

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah gotcha, yeah that makes sense you wouldn't directly say something if he doesn't know you know about the girlfriend. Ignoring him completely is a good call then, hopefully he'll get the hint that the staring isn't cool. Too bad he's not being more respectful, but props to you for taking the high road and staying unbothered - I'm sure it ain't easy! Maybe he'll wise up eventually when he realizes the ogling isn't getting any reaction from you. Definitely nothing wrong with you distancing yourself too, can't trust dudes like that. Keep doin you and don't give him the time of day, his problem not yours. Hopefully soon he finds something better to do than creep girls out all the time!

[Anonymous]

Yes, when having a girlfriend deliberate continued staring is rude and disrespectful to her.

That said; A person naturally looking into the eyes of any attractive girl should not be a problem (as obviously nor should a girl looking into another guys eyes she finds attractive, even with a boyfriend). What IS a problem is when its done with intention and disregard for their partners. Meaning if your out with your significant other and someone attractive comes along I wouldn't expect my significant other not to notice nor to be unaffected, but I would expect her to, after noticing, turn and kiss me or otherwise stare into my eyes to reflect that she's choosing me (or even just tell me how sexy I am, whilst possibly still checking out the guy, basically so I know "sure she's attracted, but I'm HER guy").

That kind of thing.