Men, do you ever take a girl out of the friendzone?

[Anonymous]

I really like my friend who has every quality I want in a partner. He’s kind, sweet, supportive, smart, helpful, caring. We have very different hobbies but try to do things in both of our likings when we are together. He drove 3+3 hours extra to take me home with him for Thanksgiving because my family wasn’t here. He also drove 3+3 hours back and forth to attend my work Christmas party as my plus one. A lot of people might assume that’s romantic but he’d do it for anyone I believe because he’s just a good person. Issue is, he has opened up to me about his former relationships and a girl he had a crush on that he missed the chance with (not me). I think he only thinks of me as a friend and a confidante and nothing more. Problem is I really like him and if I came out about my feelings and they were unreciprocated, I’d not be able to keep my friendship with him out of embarrassment at least short term. Note, I’m attractive and don’t struggle with men, I also look far better than every single girl he has ever dated in the past, by a lot. So yes maybe he’s just not attracted to me but also can I be sure? I’m also two years older than him, not sure if that’s an issue for him but he is a very open minded guy.

So help me understand guys, do men take you out of the friend zone?

[Avcfhcic]

I think for me I worry about ruining the friendship by trying to move out of the friendzone. It's happened before where I've confessed my feelings or asked them out and then things were awkward and not like before.
Women need to realise that their signs or hints are not very good 😅.

I think, since you sound like a beautiful girl and you get on really well with him, you should just sit him down and talk about it. Whether you have a couple drinks together or go on a drive, but just talk about it! You never know what will happen if you don't talk!

[Yannae]

I would have if my stupid ass realized that she liked me. Back in highschool, she threw herself at me and I was still oblivious. I found her the coolest girl in class too.

[Asker]

I have also been throwing myself at him but he’s just such a gentleman and I don't know if he’s just oblivious or doesn’t wanna think too much into my behavior with him. What should I do without directly telling him that I have feelings for him? Any suggestions? What would have worked for you?

I have tried touching his thigh when I’m drunk, I have told him he’s great, I hype him up, I show my care for him by cooking him his favorite meals, what else can I do?

[Yannae]

The only thing you can do is being straight forward and just telling him that you like him and want to go out with him. Word for word.

[spartan55]

Wow, aren't you full of yourself.

[Asker]

How so? Cause I don’t have below average self esteem about my looks?

[spartan55]

Why say you look 'far better than every single girl he has ever dated, by a lot?' That's not healthy self esteem, more like a lack of humility mixed with arrogance. Your statement is based on YOUR opinion of his former girlfriends. Why you think that matters is laughable. Judging attractiveness is highly subjective, and in your case, gives the look of petty jealousy. If you're such hot shit like you claim, you don't need to point it out to anyone who will listen.

[Asker]

I have mentioned that I look far better than his former girlfriends, and I have also said he may still not find me attractive. That is saying attractiveness is subjective. It matters because people don’t date people they don’t find attractive, visually I’m nothing like the previous girls he has dated so it is important to note. You’d much rather prefer of if I said “oh no I think I’m ugly that’s why he doesn’t like me”

[spartan55]

No, I'd prefer you don't mention looks at all, like most people.
Visually you're 'nothing like the previous girls he has dated'. What does that even mean?

[Asker]

It means “I may not be his type”

Clearly you’re trying to find reasons to be angry at my post, I can’t entertain this anymore

[spartan55]

Uh... no? Guys don't have 'types' they have preferences which aren't set in stone.

[spartan55]

So you look nothing like his former girlfriends, and you look better, by a lot. 😂 Your self awareness is non existent.
Maybe he isn't into you because of your lack of humility, and the attitude that you are better than every woman he has dated?

[Asker]

I am. Please go ahead find someone else with low self esteem to bully

[spartan55]

"I am" Way to stay on brand. Bullying you? Gimme a fucking break. If you are so hot he should be falling all over himself... right? Lol...

[Asker]

Not everyone is falling in love with Gigi hadid either. Take your lack of self esteem elsewhere, you’re not making any impact on me.

[spartan55]

Try to spin it back on me... so lazy.
Am I supposed to know who that is?
Keep telling yourself how hot you are honey.

[Firestar01]

Only in exceptional cases.

[Asker]

Like what? Can you elaborate?

[Firestar01]

I could, but I won't write down half my life story publicly, if you don't mind.

[Firestar01]

Drop a DM and I'll explain.

[shortster]

I don't put women there to begin with.

[Asker]

But he does 😭😭

[In_Trance]

This is ridiculous

[Asker]

Why? Can you explain?