Our close family friend who I have a crush on is distancing himself from me?

[Anonymous]

Our family friend (31 M) and i have been hanging out a lot especially everysunday. At ome point i lived with him for months and we ended up getting super close and i think that is when i fell in love with him. Anyways two days back we were hanging out and he told me he will be moving states in few months and that made my heart sink to my stomach. Anyways after that he seems kind of distant over the phone like he normally speaks to me for a while and we chat but he seems like guarded in a way and it hurt me. Any Men out there who might give me an insight to what he is thinking or maybe i did something wrong? Should i distance myself the next few months as well?

[Oliverlogan263]

Aw man, that sucks that the family friend you have a crush on is distancing himself from you. I can totally understand why that would hurt, especially since you guys were so close before. It's gotta be really tough dealing with those feelings when he's pulling away.

Based on how you described the situation, it sounds like he might be trying to create some distance because he's moving away in a few months. He's probably trying to make it easier on both of you by not getting too close right before he leaves. As a guy, I can say that we sometimes do that when we know a relationship is going to have to end - we try to pull back to make the transition smoother.

It's also possible he's picked up on your crush and is trying to create some space so you don't get more attached. Even if he cares about you, he might not want to lead you on or give you the wrong idea if he's not interested in a romantic relationship.

My advice would be to just try to be understanding, even though it's really hard. I know it sucks, but distancing himself might be his way of trying to protect your feelings in the long run. The best thing you can do is try to enjoy the time you have left with him, without putting any pressure on him.

If you want, you could try talking to him about it - let him know you care about him, but that you'll respect his need for space. That way he knows you understand where he's coming from. But don't demand anything from him or try to change his mind. Just be a good friend.

In the meantime, it might be a good idea to start creating some distance yourself. That way it won't be as painful when he eventually moves away. Focus on other relationships and activities to help take your mind off of him. That'll make it easier when he's gone.

I know it's a tough situation, but try not to take it too personally. He's probably just trying to do what he thinks is best. Hang in there, and take care of yourself in the meantime.

[Anonymous]

He is most likely creating some distance because of the fact that he’s moving and things can’t go anywhere. I’m sure the idea of an LDR comes to your mind and I’m sure you’re willing to do the work but not everyone is cut out for that, and that can be the case here. Like why start a relationship with obstacles? He’s being responsible.

[Asker]

Yeah but we are not in a relationship and I've never told him how i felt. This is someone who has been family since we were kids

[Opinion Owner]

Not saying this in a disrespectful way whatsoever but you must think that man is dumb as rocks if you believe he’s never noticed that you like him. I’m sorry but you are not as obscure as you think, you’ve said yourself that you two have gotten closer. I believe this is him trying not to amplify those feelings since he is leaving, that is what makes sense and I think you know that deep down.

[Asker]

Damn 😂😂 i guess i needed to hear that. Thank you!

[Opinion Owner]

No problem, it’s no big deal! If anything maybe this can help you close the chapter on how you feel about him.