What are reasons guys lose interest so fast?

Question

Even if a girl is super nice and everything and he gets along so well with her, why do some guys lose interest in every girl they talk to so fast?

sawno · Accepted Answer

Ill give a real example of a girl I already was on the fence about. She had shown a few red flags such as drinking often and being unable to keep up with me mentally. She annoyed me by disliking it when I explained things in a simple way since it wasn't simple enough to follow. I gave her the smallest details possible and she loved that and asked why I can't just explain it like that the first time while that was the time I didn't give her any information and she wouldn't learn anything about what she asked me for advice on.

A bit later in that conversation she said I had a bad habbit of constantly interrupting and not letting her finish. While she kept dropping pauses as if she had finished because she was juat a slow thinker. Any attempts to steer the conversation into something meaningful she didn't engage with.

At that point it went from me thinking she found it hard to keep up due to being drunk and it being solvable to her actually just not being smart enough to keep up. That was enough to make me never initiate a conversation again. If you object to the kind of conversations I love I have no reason to talk to you since I hate smalltalk and only do it as a diving board.

And this part is a pattern I have noticed. If I fail to have a meaningful conversation with someone I only try again if I think there's a genuine possibility of compatibility (in her case due to common interests and world views) but if it then fails again I loose interest seemingly overnight.

While me loosing interest suddenly can happen its always due to the showing of an extreme incompatibility. Sudden ones can be if she smokes a sigarette, i'm instantly out. But these conversations are a pretty quick gradual one and when I decide I am bored it will feel sudden.

Luckily for my friends and future partner the opposite is also true. If we have good chemistry and meaningful conversations, especially if I love who you are as a person I don't loose interest. And if then a conversation fell flat your not at risk as long as sometime soon we have a good one again like we usually do. It would take a while and me not seeing a reason it will get back to how it was before I give up once really comitted. I am very loyal.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

when they find out she's being fake or is hiding something shameful i. e. a promiscuous past or huge amounts of unpaid debt

however to put it more bluntly men mentally categorize women into 2 different types of desires. the modest classy ones whom they bring home to meet their friends, family and stand up for in a respectful or the promiscuous narcissistic ones whom they'd bang but not want to be seen around them outside of bragging about banging them

basically it's relationship desirability vs sexual desirability and have different desires for different women and if they don't get what they desire, they lose interest

as far as being super nice is concerned, most men are absolutely not used to this happening to them whatsoever except for super duper hot guys. average guys are lucky to get any positive female attention, ugly guys can forget it

men overall are not as appreciated thus any kindness shown towards them especially by women is seen as foreign to the point genuine kindness is no longer perceived as sincere.

even if traditional masculinity is seen as rare these days, any act of traditional masculinity such as opening the door or paying for all dates is not only expected but something that society believes all women are entitled to including those who don't actually deserve it

nobody truly knows what goes on in someone's heart whether man or woman

sage2021 · Accepted Answer

I've been watching A LOT of relationship videos practically every day and I even post some of them on GaG so people such as yourself can find answers to these types of questions like this one.

You said that you are very nice to him. I am a very nice person as well but I am finding out that when you are nice to people they think that you are a weak person and they will take advantage of you. Time and time again all of the videos say that!!

Don't bend over backwards for him.
Don't always be so available. Be like you have a busy life and pause a day or so and then make time for him. You don't want him to think that you are just waiting by the phone waiting for him to call.

Don't have sex too soon. You don't want him to think that you are a slut.

Don't tell him everything about everything all the time. Save some things and spread it out over time.
You want to be somewhat mysterious to him ok?

Remember that YOU come first! Not him because he won't respect you if you don't respect yourself and your time.

Watch for my videos that I post. If I can find one today I will come back and put it up.
Good luck 🍀🤞🏼🙂

DishLady · Accepted Answer

According to an old friend of mine, a guy will lose interest if he's just chasing hot/sexy chippies and sees that you're "relationship material." That pretty much sums up a bunch of different scenarios along those lines.

According to a few guys who I know are INTO gals who are "relationship material," they lose interest in a girl when they realize she's just a common little chippy.

Before you start handing out scarlet letters or tossing rotten tomatoes at people who you think qualify for the title title "chippy" I'm not referring to single moms who ARE relationship material but just focusing on their kids' future rather than on their personal relationship status.

SherlockHolmo · Answer

Our suspect's choice of words and the underlying tone reveal far more than they might have intended. The question posed by the pontificator, while seemingly innocent, carries a subtle hint of frustration, not towards men in general but specifically towards the dynamics of heterosexual relationships.

Their interest in the subject of men losing interest in women points to a deeper motive, a desire to disrupt conventional dating norms. The use of the term 'competition' suggests a desire to level the playing field, possibly to create an environment where alternative relationships, such as same-sex ones, might flourish more freely.

Furthermore, the mention of oral sex, albeit veiled, could be an indirect reference to their own inclinations or experiences within the LGBTQ+ community. It's not a confession per se, but the pattern of their inquiries paints a telling picture, wouldn't you agree, @AnalUnraveler?

NicholasRedone · Answer

@coxoabean a good example from me the over-thinker (and I'm happy with who I'm, I'm me) - sighs - 👀 I sort of reflect how over my 20s, many women looked my way, some repeatedly - and then they'd either ignore me at the end or just disappear/ghost or plain ignore. Cold shoulder like. So it's like Keira in Love Actually "*open mouth after watching footage back* ...(To guy) but you never talked to me - you only ever talked to Peter - you don't like me." So sometimes I wonder why women 👠 "let me become the one who got away, or, they were never into me/I had misunderstood/or eyes were lies. Lol. Eyes were lies

Nik1hil · Answer

It's called End of Chase..

See if a Guy starts his chase to achieve a women, then once achieved the women, guy will stop the chase..

This is a big problem with women, First they will make the Man Chase her, following which they will complaint about him losing interest..

Congratulations! If wasn't enjoying you, he was enjoying the chase.. The Cat and Mouse Game.

Women need to Learn that by "Making him chase you", you are setting up "The Risk of Him losing Interest suddenly" once the chase is over.

So please stop making him chase, be available and communicate.. if you don't make him chase you, instead from beginning from him asking you out, you walk with him. You will have zero Risk of Him Losing Interest in you in future.. infact.. his Interest will just keep increasing with time.

your Relationship will grow and bloom instead of getting Pumped, crash and Burn!..

HungTexan · Answer

Some younger guys have a short attention span, and get distracted by the next girl they come in contact with. It’s unfortunate, but common.

OneViewpoint · Answer

1. Because he sees flaws that the woman is blind to in herself.

2.) Because he has deep seated insecurities and fear of commitment.

3.) Because he went home and swiped right 200 times last night.

4.) Because no one ever taught him how to behave in social situations.

WilliamPamer446 · Answer

Think her boy or boobs isn't attractive enough

Thinks she's boring

Her values/belief don't align

If it's the first two stop talking

If it's the second, tell your values and explain without any ambiguity

ohsheeT · Answer

Most guys your age are not ready to settle down. And if the can't get what they want from a girl they move on... but even if they do get what they want. They move on. Even faster.. the sad part is they are very selfish in so many ways

Sonorous · Answer

Just go for guys like this, they never lose interest

YourExLover69 · Answer

Guys don't lose interest unless girl isn't showing interest, ignoring him, talking very less, flirts with everyone, cheating behind him. (If she does that I lose interest).

Gwendoline · Answer

They weren't intrested in a relationship with you to begin with merely sex and once they got it they no longer care

Anonymous · Answer

Most men have short attention spans with most things.

CupcakeTheDestroyer · Answer

He was never interested to begin with, just playing a role to get some attention he otherwise wouldn’t have at all.

Anonymous · Answer

Men are just looking to breed… i know some Mormons who cheated on their other half’s. Guys don’t excite me any more. Sebastian that’s 8inches makes me happy.

Shiprex · Answer

They see things they don't like or find the girl is no longer appealing.

jahaims · Answer

They probably just wanted sex and thought you'd be too much work

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

It takes a LOT of lady, ie., big boobs, to keep us lads' interest.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

If they lose interest in you fast that means they was never interested in you to begin with. They just wanted one thing

Dongie · Answer

Because they are females.

Valdemort · Answer

Some people are great at playing games.

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