Was he being rude?

[CruelParadise]

what does it mean if a boy says “it smells like allergies in here.” And I was the only one sitting in front of him? I had came into the class room a bit late and I had put on perfume before arriving to the school. I’ll say I’m not the most hygienic person, but I thought I smelled fine and the perfume smell wasn’t even that strong, just noticeable for me.

Updates

8 mo

He didn’t even sneeze and no one nearby did either. This took place over the colder months but I remembered it and just couldn’t figure it out for sure

[Anonymous]

Most likely it was your perfume. You may have not thought it was strong but some people have sensitive allergies. It could have been heavy as well but because you wear it so often you’re used to it so it doesn’t seem like it’s strong to you. It could also be that the smell wasn’t that good. Some perfumes smell gross. It could be that he was saying that as a way to talk shit as well. I know working in the hospital we can’t used scented lotions or body washes, colognes or perfumes because people’s sensitivities are all different.

[CruelParadise]

Yea, I don’t wear it always and I also have sensitive smell. I can smell what people are eating and they will say “you can actually smell that?”

Or smell if my family is starting to smell stronger in body odor (cause I tested it and they would say “I don’t smell anything”)

[CruelParadise]

I don't know all I know is he was totally in the wrong to say it like that. He’s supposed to be in robotics and this smart kid with two sisters. He should know better. He should! I never heard him say anything seemingly negative to people in school or friends, and then he said that. It was hurtful.

[CruelParadise]

It was wrong!! 😑

[Opinion Owner]

You think k it was wrong cause it hurt your feelings. He may not think it was wrong, others may not think it’s wrong as well. I’m not taking up for him but those may have been his feelings as well.

[CruelParadise]

No you don’t insult people with this passive aggressiveness. He EXPRESSED his feelings WRONG.

If I expressed my feelings he and I would be in a fight, suspended or juvenile detention..

We live in a civilized society you know… I thought a doctor would understand that. Another smart person who’s also a graduate and you validate his feelings and explain how I’m wrong without any sense of consolation or expression of validating MY feelings.

[CruelParadise]

I have nothing else to you to say. You seem like an insensitive, calloused person.

[Opinion Owner]

Why because I’m not crying w you? If he said smells like shit after you walked in ok might be mean. But still no one has control over your feelings but you. So if you’re going to get hurt cause someone said smells like allergies that’s on you. Nothing has meaning unless you give it meaning. Trust me this isn’t the only time you’re going to get your feelings hurt if you think he’s being so mean w what he said.

[CruelParadise]

Trust me I don’t need you to tell me how my feelings work. I’m sure glad you’re not my doctor. 0 sensitivity there.

There is also plenty of things with meaning already so it’s just called common sense at this point. No one says “YAY IT SMELLS LIKE

FREAKING AL•LER•GIES in HERE!!”

[CruelParadise]

It was a negative comment and I don’t have to like it at all. If I had thought up something quick and wise to say at the time I would’ve said it and he would have to deal with my comment and the stupid Alllllllergies stench

[CruelParadise]

I’m done having this discussion with you. I think you’re another bitchy person in the world & I’m all stocked on those

[Opinion Owner]

Oh stop crying. You got your feelings hurt over that. Good thing he didn’t say smells like shit then.

[Blunky]

I wouldn't equate it to anything more than his sinuses bothering him.

[CruelParadise]

He same it right after I came in and took my seat. Everyone was already seated

[CruelParadise]

Said*

[CruelParadise]

And his friend just looked at him but he kind of laughed

[Blunky]

Just because you're used to your perfume doesn't mean others are. Some perfume smells really bother my sinuses and since you sat right in front of him, he probably got a really strong sudden whiff of it.

[CruelParadise]

Well I thought it was rude, immature, and hurtful. People will wear scents and if not commercialized have other natural scents. It was assigned seating too, so I couldn’t choose the seat I wanted and the rest of the class was present and quiet so it was terrible timing and unnecessary

[CruelParadise]

I’d never say that out loud, like if it really bothered me I would just comment it to the person directly and personally not like how he did

[Blunky]

Some people have no self control and just spout out whatever nonsense comes to mind. I'm saying for your own sake, chock it up to him just being bothered and whining about it.

[CruelParadise]

Chock? I don't know what that means

[Blunky]

Stupid autocorrect. "Chalk it up" is a phrase meaning to accept what happened and move on. There's no need to beat yourself up over this and trying to understand what he meant is a waste of time since it wasn't anything direct. I have yet to hear anyone ever refer to someone smelling bad as allergies.

[CruelParadise]

Thanks

[CruelParadise]

yea just felt bad because the silence felt loud after and not very popular in school too. I couldn’t think of anything to say to correct him and I couldn’t because it wasn’t really directed to me specifically or conversationally I mean

[CruelParadise]

He’s slightly more popular than me and a straight A student, so it felt weird a smart kid would get rude like that to begin with

[Blunky]

I really don't know what you could even say in response to that lol. Even as a friend I wouldn't know how to continue that other than, "Don't sneeze on me".

[CruelParadise]

Yea, I should’ve tried that. Now I wish I had said lol

Or say “do you need a tissue?”

Maybe even “snot rag” to remind him humans can be gross. Which is worse perfume or boogers >:[