Is it okay to be emotional around men, for genuine advice or support from them?

[Kayla45]

I really feel like men comfort women in times of distress, that kind of compassion is nice. But I don’t know if it’s normal to kinda lean on men for that sort of comfort.

[MasseurDeMojo]

Most men want to help the woman they are in a relationship with. The key is for the man to allow you to talk things out, and by using the man as a sounding board find a solution that brings you peace. The problem, is that a lot of men feel that them trying to lead you is looked down on because at sometime in the relationship they opened up to you emotionally, and you put them down as weak.

We are all human, and we all have emotions, regardless if you are a man or woman. When we treat each other respectfully, we are able to gain insights from each other to help us overcome our emotional roller coaster. Men are fine with listening and helping, but they have a fear of what will happen when it happens to them that they are in an emotional state of disarray.

Men give a lot and never ask for much in return. We get not a lot that is of essence; just the drudges.

Is it o. k. to go to a man for emotional support? Yes!! Men will continue to be there for you to give you support, just as they have done repeatedly over the centuries. They want to make you happy, they want to see you at your best. They try to do what it takes; will you let them in to do it.

[Chazmatazz269]

It is normal, but it can be tenuous. Men aren’t permitted the same levels of open vulnerability that women are. So we can sometimes mistake a woman who just needs someone to talk to for someone who cares about us more intimately. Most dudes have damsel in distress fantasies. They’re going to fall for you if you let them. If you don’t want that, don’t let it happen. Choose your confidantes wisely. Or stick to venting to other women.

[Crimsyjo]

I think it's okay around a partner because hopefully they can make you feel better with just support and a cuddle. But if they try and you keep going on and on anyways they quickly find it too draining so it's best to rely on friends too to have a moan to and also try to fix your issues yourself not just go around complaining because that makes you a drain on everyone.

As an example years ago I had a boyfriend with bad painful tooth problem. He kept whining and complaining about it. I felt genuine compassion at first, but after I got him an emergency dentist to see but he didn't go.. well.. I don't want to keep hearing complaining if he wasn't going to actually try do something about it you know.

[alli-112]

I mean, if it's your partner or friend and you're maintaining whatever the appropriate boundaries are then sure? Why not? Same as with women I guess.

If you're seeking out support beyond what makes sense for your relationship or on some level are just seeking external validation or attention then that's obviously not the best, but it's generally fine to rely on friends and family for support.

I think we'd need more detail to actually be able to speak on whatever specific situation you're thinking about.

[Anonymous]

The one thing about most men, if you tell us a problem we’re willing to come up w ways to solve them. I get some women just want men to listen. Sure we can listen, but it’s in us to try to solve those problems as well. How do you think the world got to where it’s at w all these confronts we have. Men saw a problem so they fixed it. I think men can be very good listeners, we can be very honest, but you can’t get upset if you want honesty. Very rarely can men be honest w women cause they tend to get their feelings hurt when the truth is spoken. Now here’s some more truth, there are a number of men who will listen to you because they like you. So listening to you they figure is one way to get on your good side to possibly sleep w you or have a relationship w you. But I do believe a lot of men would listen. I know I would for sure.

[QuestionObsession]

A lot of men are simps/ pleasers to women because they want to get in their pants or come off looking like the caring kind. Apart from them, there are men who are adept at providing emotional support way better than women can, the ones who don't care to just please women but be sensible with their support and energy. Not all men are self servicing assholes and not all women show emotional compassion in good faith.

Also, there is line between seeking emotional support from men and becoming an emotional vampire who drains the energy out of men, whining all the time or using men just as a shoulder.

[Vevv123]

Just be careful about it. Don’t trust too much, this goes for people in general. Learn to provide comfort for yourself, you’re your only safe space, no one else will look after you like you do.

[Crimsyjo]

Really feeling that at the moment 🙎‍♀️

[ohsheeT]

When a women is going through something and she feels it deep because it's real then yes. There are men that will freak and want to get away because they don't know how to deal with something like that... but yes when it's real a man doesn't care how you express it they just want to make sure your ok that all there care about because they hate seeing you that up set or in pain

[DishLady]

Some guys don’t know what to do when you have feelings or want to talk. It’s not that they don’t care, but that they’re not necessarily trained to handle the emotional outpouring. You cry or seem upset they often panic and look for the quick fix (like the pacifier for a baby).


Other guys are mature and experienced enough to know you need time or space to express yourself… (usually guys who have sisters are better with this).

[overlord337645]

all of my freinds are women if anyone says otherwise i would be lost not only do they lean on me i lean on them and hell mabie im just very trustworthy but sometimes they tell me stuff that ussually you would keep between girls regardless if my relationship with all these girls as freinds can thrive I truly belive the right man can be relied upon no matter what you are going through (the right man)

[FreyaRed]

You show them your weakness. They will comfort you as long as you're useful for them. However that way you will never win them as your buddies because you need to be at least emotionally stable as they are, better is you are a level above and you're the one who solves their emotional issues. Just don't be lazy, self absorbed and don't get too comfortable, because this is a receipt for failure.

[beenherebefore]

Once in a while it's okay but in general I would control my emotions. Most people, men and women, will not have the patience for someone who's overly emotional and doesn't know how to control their emotions, that comes off as a red flag to me.

[jshm2]

No. That's how you end up with a punch in the face or in a shallow grave, by a jealous girlfriend.

Always be in control of your emptions and only get emotional with people who can deal with you.

Ok, some people are all drama, and others have mental problems, but for the vast majority, you only want to connect with people who can help you. Not those emotionally roped in to help you.

[Geo1970]

Why not? We are all in this together eh?
For example, I have good friends who are female and sometimes they will be, metaphorically speaking, a shoulder to cry on, listen to me, make valid suggestions.


Male or female, we have to be there for friends, especially those you know really well and love to bits.

[Shiprex]

You're right is is something men will almost automatically do for women because of the protective nature of men. However, some will no longer do this because of fear that this will backfire and become an expectation that women can manipulate men using emotional triggering of this behaviour.

[Benjiman19]

Yes. It's definitely okay to be emotional or to ask for genuine advice. If it's something we guys know, it's emotion. We go through a lot in our own minds and hearts and also can give a different perspective on some things rather than how women might look at it. Just give us a try

[genericname85]

in my opinion that's completely fine, IF you can accept constructive advice and don't just wanna vent your emotions. cause that's just annoying as fuck. i can't deal with that. i hat people who keep whining about their problems and then never actually doing anything about them.

[Twalli]

Men generally see things as problem-->resolution. We don't really do well when someone wants to just vent but isn't seeking a way to resolve any problem. So, it depends on what you're wanting from a guy. A lot of girls will try what a guy suggests, and it can be very good if it works. For example, I told my girlfriend to focus on all the good memories she had with a friend that died rather than the fact that she couldn't make any more good memories.

[Cormac995]

As men we expect our SO to lean on us for emotional support that's part of being a couple. If your SO isn't doing that it's a problem. Any man who won't support their SO in a time of emotional need is a POS.

[Godihateyou]

I have found that men offer support genuinely out of a need to defend protect and make better. These woman then ride their dicls and any other dicls available the dick riding causes problems. This is why American men dont seek American woman. All the dick riding

[AviatorTom]

We men expect women to be emotional, showing emotion more than us men. That's one of the major differences between men and women, and the way it should be.

To women of all ages: Please don't be afraid to be emotional around us men.

[meepmeeperton]

Yeah it's fine. Just be weary some of them will take that as you getting close/emotionally intimate with them and possibly develop feelings or try to hit on you.

[RavVid]

We are disposed to protect women and comforting is part of the deal.

For myself I draw a line when it feels like I am pouring water into a sponge.

[Valdemort]

My friends support me like I support them. Which is why we're friends. Whether men or women doesn't change that.

[WonderingManII]

I think you need to be careful about what men you are leaning on for this kind of support. But if He is your boyfriend and you allowed him to get to know you really good, then I think yes.

[NathanDavis]

Yes... just don't trust all of them, that's not wise

[Anonymous]

Within reason. Nobody likes a whiner. And there are plenty of women that do and in addition fabricate drama just for guys attention. Those women get exhausting very quickly. Guys like to help. But nobody likes being used and manipulated.

[MannMitAntworten]

People lean upon who they feel safest with to do so. For you that is men. There is nothing abnormal in your doing of this.

[fish5505_87]

I try to be a good friend to all my friends, male or female, I guess you have to be a good judge of people to decide answer the question you ask?

[DJB72]

That's what we're supposed to be doing in a relationship

[Jennz6]

Be careful of what you tell them about your weaknesses

[TheoreticallyGreat]

Depends on the man. If they're trustworthy it can be safe.

[LiamS95]

I supose it depends on the guy, i really enjoy comforting a woman in distress.

[LiamJHayden]

It is okay to be yourself around those you can trust.

[RedInnocent69]

Of course it is. Just don’t be surprised if we’re not as vulnerable in return.

[hello4433]

It's fine. But share only with the person you can rest ally trust

[Panthero80]

I certainly wouldn't mind. I'm here for you or anyone.

[Taylor_C]

No, they generally hate that

[Anonymous]

They have therapists for this.

[TwoToTooTutu2]

That depends on the relationship between you two.

[Chocolatetwopointtwo]

no men won't help shit

[bananathunder]

sure. Anyone can be supportive

[wkhan_87]

I think nothing is abnormal about that

[Anonymous]

Yes, I think it's ok.

[WhitneySnow]

It’s ok

[bowenw]

Normal.

[Anonymous]

You must be single

[LiaRaven]

Not all of them

[Dün1bugün2]

No, manipülasyon

[SamWinchester058]

Absolutely.

[Boythatlive16]

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Certainly.