I'm so terrified of my weight, I just looked at a photo of myself and I think I'm going to never eat again! what do I do?

[Breakingbermuda]

I have always had terrible body issues. Even when I was 110bls I wanted desperately to be 90. I (against my will) was put on birth control and gained a crazy amount of weight. I even wrote in lipstick on the mirror that I could look at the mirror until i was back to 115lbs. That goal seems impossible. I remember balling my eyes out when I broke 120 pounds. Now, I look at myself, and I am disgusted. I don't want any "be yourself" stuff because I'm sick of hearing it, I just need help. What do I do? How do I love myself? How do I lose 15/20 pounds? Starving myself and jamming the end of my toothbrush down my throat are the only things that seems to work, unfortunately, that is stupid, dangerous, and short term. Not to mention, dramatic.

[willow74]

Sweetie... :( please see someone. Please. I've been battling this shit for over five years... please turn around and get help. The earlier the better, hun, but remember that it's never too late. You don't have to do this alone.
It's really not worth it. I'm struggling myself to see that every day, but I'm slowly getting better. Take baby steps. Start with your scale. Get rid of it. It's painful but it's something that needs to happen. And please confide in someone you trust. Your mother or a teacher or an aunt or SOMEONE. It's so much harder to beat without support. It's tough to face the fact, but you truly need to seek counseling of some sort. Don't ever be ashamed to ask for help.
STOP starving yourself. I know it's not easy, but promise yourself that you will truly try. Eat healthy foods, as little processed junk as possible. And work out. Do a combination of cardio and weights, I promise results will come. And exercise creates all these happy chemicals in your brain, and I promise that they will help on this long and tough journey. Don't over do it, though. Listen to your body.
Don't ever forget that you're not alone, okay? And that you are loved. I love you, and I don't even know you. But I know your struggle, as I face it every damn day of my life. And because I know and understand your pain, I love you. Don't ever hesitate to message me if you need to get it all out.
Hang in there, hun. It's not easy. Please take my advice to heart, it's spoken with experience.

[Breakingbermuda]

Getting help will be hard. Not a lot of people take me seriously because I'm not skinny, so they think "if she had issues she would be skinny from trying so much", but it's not like that. I'm sure you understand.

[willow74]

I'm not skinny, either. The professionals that you need will take you seriously, because they understand that you need help at any stage of this.
Look up EDNOS. That's what I have, and by the sounds of it, what you have. It's the most dangerous, but least known of ED.

[Breakingbermuda]

I'll look that up, and maybe dm you.

[smexiliciousss]

i've always cared about my weight too much as well. when i ran for 3 miles a day and ate healthy i lost 10 pounds in 2 months and it was PERMANENT

[Breakingbermuda]

God, I'm going to try that for sure, time management is hard but I can try. That sounds great. If I lose the weight that I want to I won't be able to explain how much happier I will be.

[Nick7]

Drink only water. 2/3 of your plate should be green veggies and 1/6 each of meat and starch. Rule of thumb, your protein should only be about the size of your palm. Try to stay away from the starches as much as possible. Don't eat any junk food. Maybe one snack a day. Don't drink milk or and juice or soda. Exercise

[TJM27]

Just exercise everyday, drink only water, don't eat any junk food, and try eating like 5 small healthy meals per day instead of 3 larger meals. Losing weight is pretty simple. You just need to burn 3,500 more calories than you take in to lose 1 pound

[Hefziba]

Hi :) i was 245 pounds n it was crazy! Now I'm 150 maybe less, anyway. To lose weight you have to cleanse; you can use products to cleansing your body or you can also make a juice or shake with greens (it's what I'm doing right now) just check online the ingredients for this kind of juices :) YOU GOT THIS!!!

[Drooogie4]

Can you get off the pill?
Don't throw. up, trust me... Thats gonna end way worse than you think.

Eat carefully, drink lots of water... Workout?

[Breakingbermuda]

I have an iud. My parents won't let me get it taken out. But I will do that. Thanks.

[Drooogie4]

Why won't they let you? That's not legal I don't think..

[Breakingbermuda]

It is, they have medical rights over me, and if I don't then they will practically keep me on house arrest.

[Pink2000]

Gee wiz 129 lbs you must be fat... 😑 but I doubt it. Honestly it depends on how you're shaped. It could all be in your stomach or all in your butt. You could have a flat butt and a big gut or flat stomach and a big butt. Or it could be evenly distributed. I'm sure your fine and stop worrying. If you're that uncomfortable then go on a healthy diet.

[pats-life]

I like thick girls so don't worry someone thinks ur sexy just find them p. s.-120lbs isn't fat not at all 😊😊

[Breakingbermuda]

lol, thank you. Hearing that helps.

[ButtHoleSandwich]

You need therapy. sounds like you have body dysmorphia. Seek help girl.

[Shrugs83]

This

[Breakingbermuda]

No way. I'm short, 129 doesn't sound overwhelming, and gaining ten pounds doesn't sound bad either, but when your 5'2, you might as well be gaining 30.

[ButtHoleSandwich]

You said you balled your eyes out at 120 pounds and you look at yourself In disgust, and even at 110 pounds you desperately wanted to be 90. That doesn't sound like normal thoughts for someone who even is ok the shorter side. It's not about what is on the scale. It's on how you look and feel. If you look great why lose? You aren't defined by a number. Eat right and work out.

[ButtHoleSandwich]

"On"

[Breakingbermuda]

Okay. I'll ask about it. I'll see who will listen. But I am still going to try to get my bmi down to 17.0 or 18.5

[Breakingbermuda]

I will talk to a counseler though.

[ButtHoleSandwich]

Great! I'd never want you or anyone to get to the point where it becomes an obsession or lead to an eating disorder. Glad you will talk to someone. Best wishes

[Breakingbermuda]

Thank you. (: I can see what I can do.

[emerald77]

Just eat better and work out! No need to starve or that other thing D:

[9mfeo]

Have you ever considered getting professional help for your body dysmorphic disorder?

[Breakingbermuda]

I don't have that tho. lol

[9mfeo]

Well, you have something. You certainly have an eating disorder. No advice on the internet is going to be enough. You need help. Real help from a professional.

[Breakingbermuda]

I'll see what I can do. I don't really know if it's like that bad. I just want to look nice in clothes, or where cute swimsuits when I go swimming, or hangout with my boyfriend without feeling like I should cover myself up, even when he tells me I have nothing to worry about.

[KhaysunDei]

Hmmm... I think you need to find someone who loves you for who you are.

[Breakingbermuda]

I do. He loves me more than anyone ever has. I'm just not happy with myself. It doesn't make a lot of sense really, but for whatever reason. I just haven't been happy

[KhaysunDei]

You are 16, just be patient, this is a normal period teenagers go through where they can't help but compare themselves to other people. As you grow older, you give less fcks on what people think.

[Breakingbermuda]

I hope so. Sixteen is a stupid age, and I can't wait to pass it. Thank you.

[Klaatu51]

whoa wait... how tall r u?

[Breakingbermuda]

I'm 5'2 and 129 lbs. ):

[Klaatu51]

it's normal weight stop worryin!

[Breakingbermuda]

I'll try (:

[LovesDemBabes]

how tall r u? if ur like 5'6 and 120 u r healthy

[Breakingbermuda]

I'm only 5'2

[LovesDemBabes]

5'2... Hmmm. healthy weight for u would be 100-110 lbs