Why do Guys care so much about a woman's "perfect" body? And is it possible for a guy to be attracted to a slightly chubby girl, if she's very pretty?

[Anonymous]

Hey, i am asking because i feel like if i don't lose 20 pounds soon, i will be destined to a lonely life with cats in an abandoned home on a deserted street. I know losing weight is not impossible, and i am not grossly overweight, i could do with a bit of weight loss though. And i feel hungry ALL THE TIME, i don't know what the heck is wrong with me. Maybe i should get checked for iron deficiency or thyroid issues. I was told that i am anemic, so whoopee! Going up 10 steps gives me bouts of dizziness and vertigo, as if I've ran a damn marathon. SO i don't even know. I keep nagging my dad to get me an elliptical, but he won't budge, and there's no way in hell i am dragging my cellulite ridden fat ass to the gym to run for 15 seconds on a treadmill before i have to stop and catch my breath, especially if some hot guy with a 6 pack happens to be right beside me watching my ass jiggle.

Anyways, i guess the only solution for me is to restrict myself to 1300 calories a day, which amounts to about a slice of bread with some chicken and a slice of tomato. i honestly don't know how some girls can maintain their perfect figures. But then i see them walking around with tiny little salads and a carrot for "dessert", and i am like, hell no.

Updates

+1 y

OOOooo, i'm famous!!!

[isbey]

There are plenty of men out there who prefer women in the chubby side. There also probably even more men who don't really care so much about your appearance if you're a good person. Personally, I have a huge problem with women who are slightly overweight. I'm extremely skinny and being with a woman who's bigger than me makes me feel emasculated because of my fragile make ego. But there are many men who are a lot stronger willed than me. If you want to lose weight, do it for yourself so you can be proud of your body. Don't do it to get a man. You can find men without losing weight. Or you can be alone. There's really nothing wrong with being alone. There's lots of people who live their whole life alone and they're very happy with it. Friends are more important than boys anyway.

[Asker]

Thanks, but i don't think i want to be alone. But thank you, that was sweet of you. And to respectfully disagree, friends can often sabotage you. I think a soulmate is much more stable.

[isbey]

Really not true. A true friend is a friend for life and will always be there. Honestly it's so important to have a group of friends who you can count on for anything and call family. There's really no such thing as a soul mate and even the best of relationships can end horribly in which case, you'll need some friends to help you. 'Soul mates' can stab you in the back too. Just be sure that you're happy with yourself. If you love yourself, other people will love you too.

[Asker]

That's great, but i really don't believe in friends. Maybe it's easier for guys to make genuine friends, but for women, if you happen to have a "cuter dress" the green-eyed monster and the fake compliments start coming at you. I still believe a soulmate is capable of a lot more loyalty than a friend can ever be, but i respect your opinion. Perhaps my distrust stems from the fact that i have been brutally betrayed by so-called "friends." But usually a soul mate loves you. I don't know if friends can love you as much as a soulmate.

[isbey]

Maybe you could try being friends with guys. My friends that are girls are the best

[Asker]

Good point, I do hang out better around guys. But everyone says that guys and girls can't be friends if there are no "benefits," which I think is beyond bullshit. Wish some girls were more like guys, like, do guys get super jealous when a guy with "cuter shoes" walks in?

[isbey]

I do

[lloydrz]

It depends on the person inside to me; to be as frank and blunt as possible with no context, my longest and most cherished relationship was with someone over weight and that factor is irrelevant.
I had friends with benefits with someone over weight.
Idgaf, I was attracted to their personalities they were beautiful people to me at the time even though everyone around me was like 'wtf man she's fat' or 'she's a whale' and I stood there perplexed that anyone could be so vile.

BUT ultimately, if you aren't currently healthy or if YOU aren't happy with how you look to yourself, take other peoples opinions out of the equation, you should change to how YOU see fit. Be the person YOU want to be and you'll find someone who will fall in love with you for it, I promise you.

[Asker]

Wow thank you guys so much. Honestly, all of your kind words are making me cry. I think I've spent too much time hanging around toxic people who've made me feel nothing more than worthless. Where are all you good people hiding?

[lloydrz]

Go to the doctor if you aren't comfortable but in the mean time just love yourself, because no one else can do that for you: love yourself and people will love you for that.

[Wonderer89]

I don’t think most men have expectations of perfection, as the ideal for everyone doesn’t exist and simply put no one is perfect.

But honestly a few things in your post kind of raise concerns for me... if you can’t go up a small flight of stairs or run for 15 seconds (and I get that these are probably slight exaggerations 😉) then you seriously need to put some thought into your health. You can actually fit a lot of food into 1300 calories - providing it’s the right stuff and perhaps that’s something to look into while making a few other changes as well

[sensualquinoa]

Losing weight is a perfectly fine goal. Just make sure you're not starving yourself or anything. There's plenty of guys who will love you for who you are.

I always think of it this way: if my bitchy high school Spanish teacher was able to get married, there's hope for all of us.

[Asker]

ha ha, lol. Jeez, thank you for the kind words. In my case, the bitchy teacher was in English.

[CJC96]

Honestly I'd say go to the gym but start with something a little less intensive like rowing or stationary cycling. If you have issues walking up stairs then that should be your reasoning for going rather than physical attraction. You only get one body and the better you treat it the better you'll feel. Don't view physical exercise as a punishment and do it as something you want to do, you'll be surprised how much you'll enjoy the gym after about 2 weeks of consistency.

Also look into weight training, it's great for weight loss if you are looking for that as muscle regrowth continues over days meaning that you are burning extra calories while not even being at the gym. You won't look like a body builder or anything, those people are professional athletes who put a very large amount of time and dedication to reach their level. When you see ig models with that "perfect body" they most likely have had surgery and if not they definitely do weight training.

[Asker]

Thanks, I am seriously considering it, as soon as my exams are over. Ugh, so hard to not get fat when you haven't slept in three days and all that keeps you from going insane is your dark chocolate.

[dizmuhjam]

Face>Body

If she has a face you can't look at because you're so disgusted by her Amy Whinehouse teeth for example, then she could have a body of a victoria secret model and it still wouldn't go up. So before worrying about perfectionizing your body, I would simply take care of being hygenic and clean and without pimples. I had a chubby one and its not that bad actually. As long as she takes care of herself, she can still be very appealing.

[dizmuhjam]

What is that update referring to? 😂

[Asker]

Oh, just that my question got so popular, hee hee. :)

[Josh00000001]

Yes and to put it in a guys perspective it's not about weight till ur stomachs holds ur chest up that's my limit anyway and slightly chubby is ok even if the girl is just ok looking and from my point of view I'm a soldier with a six pack and a presentable face I am feeling the same way relationship wise I don't know what to do but if I don't so something imma be alone the rest of my life so don't worry a few extra pounds won't hurt you especially if u can work it

[Asker]

What, woah, if you're a soldier with a six pack, how do you have an issue relationship wise? Shouldn't girls flock towards you?

[Josh00000001]

You would think but no I haven't even had sex in over a year I'm trying to at least have a girlfriend rn but I don't know don't wanna do the whole one night stand thing doesn't set right with me

[Josh00000001]

Damn wrong post how did I mess this up

[Josh00000001]

... nvm disregard that lol

[Fädzy]

In my opinion you should do what ever makes you happy, if you like to eat, eat. If you want to lose weight, lose weight. But however there is always someone who will like you as the way you are. My girlfriend had the same problem earlier that she thought I wouldn't like her because she is a bit chubby, well I do like her body. So someone will like yours too, you just haven't found him yet. Hope you find someone good for you :3

[Asker]

Thank you so much. I think you're girlfriend is very lucky to have a man like you, who values her beyond her flaws. :)

[askmegirlagain]

Most of the guys don't look for perfect body. Slight chubby is quite a favourite of many.

[Asker]

Thanks. Man, i feel like this site is so patronizing sometimes. Look, right underneath your comment, they posted a very helpful weight loss ad. Jeez. But seriously, thanks. I honestly thought that guys who liked slightly chubby girls didn't exist, i thought all guys preferred Meghan Fox type figures.

[askmegirlagain]

Yep that's how Internet works. It's okay. Yes definition of perfect varies. Little chubby is perfect for many than you can think of. You gotta be in your element and be yourself.

[Meninist]

Well you say hell no to carrots so I think you know your weight is caused by your diet.

[Meninist]

Also,

Why do Guys care so much about a woman's "perfect" body?

Why do women care so much about a guy’s perfect body?

[Asker]

Nah, i am totally cool with carrots. Although all girls trying to lose weight tend to eat ONLY carrots or other satiable food that makes one feel full, such as lettuce or celery, so, hence my dislike. I like my meat, can't live without it.

[Asker]

When do women care about men's perfect bodies? Are you serious, i don't. I feel like i can only judge someone so far as how well i compare, so i can't judge someone when i myself am inadequate. And even if i was smokin', i still wouldn't care that much. Unless he wasn't downright obese, i would not care if he had some flaws.

[Meninist]

There’s nothing wrong with eating meat, especially a lean cut low on fat.

Do you eat cakes, chocolate etc?

[Meninist]

They care about men’s bodies all the time.

Spend a day talking to women about their perfect man and he’s always above 6ft, dark, muscular etc.

[Asker]

What, okay, i am 5 feet 2, and any guy above that would do. As for the muscular thing, i don't want him to be skin and bones, but i am not seeking a six pack either. And i do tend to prefer dark haired men, how'd you know? But then again, don't "gentlemen" tend to "prefer blondes?" Also, i do like chocolate and cake, but i eat it once every few months, not every week. So i think i am not being smart with how i eat. i eat small amount of food, but it happens to be high in calories. So essentially, i eat empty calories. Gotta rid my cupboards of that dangerous rice.

[Kuraj]

Why? Because being skinny is really not the problem that overweight people are desperately trying to make it to be.

Being slim and healthy is the bare minimum you can do for yourself.
It takes no effort to *not* put stuff in your mouth.
And if you don't have the self control to prevent yourself from eating when you aren't hungry, just for the sake of having nice taste in your mouth for a few seconds, at the cost of permanently ruining your health.
Then I just can't have faith in the other decisions that you make.

No tolerance here.

[Asker]

Who says I eat when I am not hungry? I said I am anemic and have thyroid problems. I never said being skinny is a problem, if you're going to come here and insult me (fat shame me) then I don't need your opinion. I know full well that I need to lose weight. And it is very difficult for some people, no matter how well they eat or how much they exercise, to lose weight, It is called low metabolism, so educate yourself before you fire off something ignorant such as "not put stuff in your mouth." And don't worry about having faith in my decisions, I think my life is going on a good path thus far. Got into one of the top 20 universities in the world, and on track to get into law school. Unfortunately, I did have to deal with anorexia for a few years. so thanks for your advice.

[Kuraj]

I wasn't talking to you, I was talking in general.

Also, I know how metabolism works, it doesn't matter what "condition" you have, if you have adipose tissue, you are eating more food than you need to be eating.
There is no other way to fix that than eating less food.

It is perfectly normal to feel hungry, that is how you should feel like if you want to lose weight.

[ericclayton]

I myself prefer a cute girl who's 20 pounds overweight to a "ideal weight" girl that I'm not attracted to.

[Asker]

It's really nice to see that not all guys seek perfection. Thank you.

[ericclayton]

"Perfection" means a different thing to me than what you think. :)

[rusty1333]

Well I love chubby girl. As the saying goes, "the more the vision the better the pushin"!

[Asker]

pushin? What, i am not going to try to decipher that. Anyways, thanks. :)

[Asker]

Oh, that was supposed to be a smiley, i honestly don't know how to work these emojis.

[rusty1333]

Lol it means chubby girls are better lovers!😉

[lookskill]

For me once you get a curtain (were your stomage hangs a good couple inches ) or have cottage chees legs your still good looking size wise

[lookskill]

Till you get

[MajorEasy]

Don't know who told you that...

If guys only wanted perfect bodies, 80% of women won't have a partner...

What we like to see and what we will accept are two different things... Similar to how girls view guys...

[JSmith925]

Oh hell yeah! I have always preferred woman with a little volume.
~JSmith

[Aroso]

I don't care... Women with perfect bodies also care for want good looking men. It is only when we have flaws in us that we don't seem to mind others flaws

[Mexicoman101]

I like a girl with a little tummy going on

[Asker]

Really, that much "little" tummy? Or are you just trying to be cute?

[Mexicoman101]

It's a little bigger than my ideal but typing in 'plump belly' on google or some shit like that doesn't conveniently yield what I'm exactly thinking of. I have a preference for chubby girls with soft, delicate bellies.

[mikehoncho44]

Yes, im not 16 im 24.
But im fit and good-looking. And i find chubby women extremely hot and attractive. Especially if you have a pretty face

[Andyjohn815]

Yes. I prefer a girl who's smart to hold a conversation rather than how she looks. Looks fade love can but doesn't often

[Andyjohn815]

You need a guy who likes you for you lol get in touch lol

[DontHaveIdea]

It is possible