Getting married or staying married for a stab at changing a trending social norm is a terrible idea.
Many guys nowadays come at the topic far too logically and logically it makes sense.
The institution of marriage began to erode the moment divorce was conceived. To the point people game the system. Making the whole idea of marriage unappealing or even terrifying.
Luckily I have few such worries or concerns. Marriage in this day and age is boiled down to three slips of paper and a few half heart words from a efficient that may or may not be qualified to guide the service.
All that being said, i was married before. Met her in second grade dated in high school. Spent 4 years apart and married at the young age of 21. Married a total of 6 months. Together for only two of those months.
Fast forward to my current wife, together for three years, married 6. And i love her more then ever.
The legal, official form of marriage is pointless except for tax purposes.
Dedicating oneself to another is still as beautiful as ever.
I think I get what you’re saying.. but the problem is the risk vs reward.
Dating itself is a nightmare. If you manage to tough it out and find someone you’re compatible with and checks all your boxes then there is marriage. Marriage has a more than 50% chance of failure.. and as a guy it’s even riskier because women initiate 80% of divorces. When women initiate divorces they overwhelming win custody rights, child support and something’s even alimony. This makes you as a man undateable and working forever to support a family that left you.
You can read the horror stories online from many confused men. Many are written by women years after the fact that regret leaving their loving husband because they were bored or thought they could do better. Someone you may know has probably been through divorce court. There’s a reason they call it the grinder.
This is not including the couples who don’t get divorced but are just miserable together.
It’s not that guys don’t want to commit, it’s just not worth the trouble for most guys anymore.
It is not that marriage is pointless, people just don't care anymore. Allow me to explain. If you read in the Bible, 1st Corinthians 7 fully explains what a marriage is. Regardless of what anybody says, this is how marriage is and was supposed to go. But how many follow that? less than 1% from what I am seeing. And for those reasons, is why I PERSONALLY don't see what is the point of marriage or getting involved with just any man on that level. I am a virgin, never dated, never got involved with a guy or had a boyfriend. I am just tired. I went through a lot hell because I refused to open my legs to every guy who comes along. From what I am seeing people just like screwing up each other's lives all in the name of sexual gratification and "winning", be if it's getting a marriage or children. It is at the expense of everybody else. People think of it as a game or a toy. And it's the one "game" I refuse to play. My life, my heart and my body is not to be played with.
Getting married, like the act of getting married, never appealed to me. The dress, the planning, the attention…. hard pass for me thanks. Beyond that, there is really nothing that being married offers that I don’t already have. We have kids, we jointly own property, wills are done. Breaking up for us would be just as difficult as if we were married, except, I don’t have to pay the government to say “okay, we agree that you are broken up.” 🙄
We are just as committed as any married couple. Maybe more so considering all the weddings we have attended that have already ended in divorce.
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The only mutual benefits to a marriage comes from having children. And considering how violently divided the world is, few want to raise kids in an environment where civilization seems to be sliding backwards.
Parents want a better future for their kids at the expense of the here-and-now. Adults who are not parents want a better here-and-now at the expense of the future. Both are reasonable expectations and we normally come to a compromise that accomplishes both - just neither fully.
But because so much infotainment has been made to keep us at each other's throats all the time no one can agree to disagree anymore. So, many are opting to just join the here and now crowd which means no children which negates the point of marriage.
Because when you're a man, there's a big chance you're kissing half your net worth bye bye.
Is there an actual benefit? Something you can't just have in a committed non-married relationship? Nope.
So all the risk for no benefit. Marriage is simply an outdated religious institution.
Because a marriage takes three people to make and two to maintain, but only one to break- and the price of that breaking is enormous, financially and emotionally. It's a high risk of a giant loss with precious little gain. You can decide to reverse the trend by a having a marriage that lasts a lifetime, but then, that's what everyone thinks they're going to do. And even if YOU decide to stick it out through the ups and downs, if you're partner doesn't, your marriage is just another statistic.
So you expect men to risk their lives, everything they worked for, sign a piece of paper that makes them legal slaves and give the woman legal power over them in a system that supports women in every just so we can take up a challenge and somehow change the world. Yeah that sounds very smart. Exactly what a stupid woman would do. I prefer to make a cost/benefit analysis and proceed carefully with a strategy. I will never stop telling young naive men to avoid marriage like the plague.
Are your views based on religion? If yes, then why are you following that religion? People think marriage is pointless because of facts and experience. Religious people either are afraid of God or think they'll get cookies for following God. What's your reason? Why are you doing what you are doing? Are you thinking enough?
70% or higher of divorced are started by women and 50% of all marriages end in divorce..
Women get alimony, taking half, and if you have kids 25% of your eating and 5-10% extra per kid.
Why would anybody in there right mind get married?
Women trade up and do not value good men until they are used up.
Play the first fellas. Have a kid with a chick outside the USA or if you have a kid don't get married
Because it could be a financial disadvantage and we accomplish things by ourself more easily nowadays than ever
Because it is basically meaningless. You can still get cheated on, divorced, your life ruined. So why commit in this way? If you are not married, the same events carry almost 0 risk to your life afterwards.
Marriage is just a made up game adults play, it doesn't actually mean anything, except maybe legally, which complicates things further. If you want to play that game go for it. Those who don't, good for them too.
Marriage to me is just a license and nothing else. If you wanna get separated, the process is hard and time consuming. No one wants that
Don't know, but it's an annoying philosophy.
Because it's not necessary.
Simply put people are tired
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