How is it unfair to ask for a decent ring when a woman is asked to give up her maiden name? (Page 2)
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You be surprised how many people call it off over it.
"Whats in a name? That in which we call a rose by any other name name would smell as sweet"
-Romeo and Juliet.
I’m not too surprised. I mean it’s fine if people wanna not do rings or names, but if a guy wants a girl to do all that paperwork and give up something that connects her to her family and heritage; he shouldn’t get outraged if she’d like a ring that was durable enough to withstand longer than a month of wear.
I agree.
Then don't get married. You don't deserve a decent ring, not with that entitlement.
The whole concept of marriage is honoring your vows, not a stupid shiny ring. It's about commitment and duty, something that you don't seem to understand.
No, you don't have to give up your maiden name either, you have the option to merge yours with his. Wow, shocking right? Women like yourself are exactly why most marriages end in divorce.
£1,000 is decent these day
Good thing about a recession I suppose
I had that figure set between £5k-£10k, lower rings generally get parted when I get them through
Seen rings worth a million before frankly pointless because they are either the size of candy rings or so clean they look like cubic zirconia
I never took my husbands last name perhaps its cuz I knew we would never last LOL And I lost my wedding ring a year into the marriage he never bought a new one, It was only 500 pounds so no big deal xD
500 pounds is an irrational amount to a lot of dudes tbh 😭
But yeah if you have that feeling you shouldn’t have said yes, I’m sure he had the same. But we all make mistakes in love, hopefully you’ve learnt from them 🙏
Yeah I learned a lot from him and I grew so much in this last year since being alone... finally getting myself sorted and learning to love myself and get things done.
That’s good, it’s always best to learn from even the worst situations and to grow. Too many people wanna dwell on them and just keep making the same mistakes. I’ve been there too at times, so I empathize. Just have to aspire to wisdom.
Oh why didn't you tell us you got in a bad wedding. So sorry to hear you got hurt Anemone978.
And no, wedding things expensive or not must be kept like they are bonded to your bone. They are like heirlooms you give from parents to offspring to grand offsprings till the heroic act takes place like in those movies where Mongolian Horde tried to steal the wives and the wives rather take their own lives then to be slaves. May be I am thinking too romantically tragic things
@AmeerX Ah the marriage was horrible it was just tough.. but I got through it LOL
As for the wedding ring he said I could pick whatever I wanted and went with his mom but his mom basically picked it and I never liked it so when I lost it, it wasn't a big deal. We just both didn't have wedding rings no biggie lol
*wasn't horrible
Hey still, I think if you can do reconcile with the guy. You seem like a kind girl )).
This question is so wrong.
I have to be blunt, I think some women need to stop thinking of relationships in such a materialistic way.
and... why would any man particularly want to divest a woman of her birth name... I never got that.
"None of those latter men are self aware and fair enough to compromise on giving up both traditions the other values."
A wedding ring a tradition. A very new and very stupid tradition. Women never got anything for a marriage until around the 1930's. They were happy just to get married. You'll get nothing and like it or stay single and buy a bunch of cats.
Neither one is required for the person to love each other. I voted Option C:
"I’ll get her the best within reason, and we can compromise on the last name." I hate my mother anyway, so I don't care about the last name.
Talk to your boyfriend. this is based on the two of you. We don’t know your situation. How much money you both have. What are your future goals for both.
It’s not my boyfriend lmao he’s great. I’m talking about cheap incels
Why do you care about other guys when you have someone great!
I gave a very nice ring and I STILL had to deal with the name bullshit! lol! Sometimes you just can't win!
Sorry 😭 my point is more to put it into perspective rather than to say one is exchanging for the other
Lol the price of the ring has nothing to do w his last name. Either you willingly take his last name or I’d advise him to find someone else who is willing to have his last name. Same goes for you. If you want a bigger ring find a man who is willing to give that to you not cause his fiancé made him feel bad about the ring he got her. Chances are though your marriage won’t last that long.
If she is unhappy with the ring size she most be a gold digger. The ring should be about 1/2 his month salary. Maybe that is all he can afford. If she loves him she will except that. If the wife is already In a profession, i. e. like a Dr, then I would be ok with her not changing names, but my kids will bear my last name. Especially if it is a male.
I think the last name should be of whichever family is most supportive or accomplished with the man's name being default in a tiebreaker.
My family has for the most part been terrible to me so I happily took my wife's last name.
As for demanding a fancy ring that's beyond your mans means, that's the kind of foolishness that would make me reconsider my options lol
When did I say that? 😂😂 you’re reaching and I doubt your that tall.
I said decent ring. Reasonable. Within his means.
What I’m complaining about is a guy who will spend thousands on videogames, demand you take his last name, then throw a 20$ ring at you if any at all
A woman isn't getting just the ring. She's also getting access to her man's resources. A ring is not a practical asset. It does not appreciate and it has no real use. Asking for a rock just because is asinine. Marriage is about the damn ring, and if that's your deal breaker then your fiancé needs to run for the hills.
We were saving to buy a house. We had no engagement ring. We did buy gold wedding bands and ten or so years later I bought my wife a gold ring with inlaid diamonds. I heard that kids are not buying engagement rings anymore.
You can keep your name nowadays. For instance, if a woman named Awesome with the last name of Ding marries a guy with a last name of Bat, she would go by the name of Awesome Ding Bat.
Are you really okay with not giving your children his name because you wanted an expensive ring? It just doesn’t sound like your priorities for a marriage are in the right order.
It shouldn’t be about the ring. It’s about building a life with someone you love and wanting to share their name, and becoming a family. (Spoken by someone who would love to have a special ring from the man who wants to share a life with me.)
Not my point
Is your father willing to pay your suitor a lump sum of money or other dowry, such as property or livestock?
You just don’t want to hear the truth. Sometimes people say things that might upset you but it doesn’t mean that’s what’s intended.
And what exactly is your definition of decent because that term can vary quite a bit.
Also I don't really see why or how the two should be tied together?
My only point is that one is more expected, while the other is shamed for even asking. Both involve the early stages of marriage.
What does the word decent mean to you?
Well one of those things segments you and your partner as married and hosts tax benefits and will last you the rest of your life.
The other is a ring that shows that your engaged and is a way for women to show off to their friends and family. And once your actually married the engagement ring comes off and the ring band goes on. But I get why women are the way they are about em so I try to be a little understanding about em.
Also decent for me would be I don't know probably around two to three thousand. I really don't see myself spending more then 3,000$ but I'd be willing to go up to that.
Though I might end up using a family ring instead I don't know since I like the sentimental value of it and passing something along through the family.
Assuming I would date or marry which I would never do either, only assuming. The last name issue has feminist written all over them, I would avoid.
I agree, and men not wanting to give a ring or only a cheap one gives the same vibes as the parallel selfish incels who want everything tailored to their own convenience.
My main point is just that it’s a lot harder emotionally plus tons of stressful paperwork to change your name for the man you love than it is to pick up a bit of overtime and eat out a little less to get the woman you love something decent and durable.
Feminist are literally adding their maiden name to everything everywhere including women from long marriages that already had their husbands last names also adding their mothers maiden names to their mothers head stones when their mothers pass away. So the cost argument is void.
Also what is your definition of incel? I ask because women seem to throw that term around at any and everyone they have a disagreement with.
As I said, parallel to feminist. The same as calling a guy a soy boy or a cuck if he is a feminist, the flip is a pickmegirl.
Incel used to mean one thing, but now it’s more for whiny men who want to blame everything on women and society rather than working on themselves. They prefer to be lazy and paint themselves as victims, just like most modern feminists do. While also still feeling entitled to the other gender to uphold traditional values that convenience him while not expecting the same to be done for ones he doesn’t like. Like a feminist who sleeps with guys casually, or doesn’t get dressed up or shaved; but still wants men to pay for the date.
When you refer to those men as painting themselves as victims many of them are victims due to feminism and biased laws against men. Therefor we men are actual real victims. And that's exactly why I walked away from the idea of dating and marriage years ago I saw it back then. And now? Forget it no way would I ever consider either. I am thought of as a rapist a predator I don't even go around women anymore and children forget it I don't go near them. Men are victims.
And women and black people call themselves very real victims. How is yours different? Anybody can twist anything to make them look pathetic… but shit sucks for everyone! Maybe you dealt with some sexism, maybe a woman has been raped, maybe you lost your kids, maybe she was passed over for a job to a man.
Everybody has their own stuff, when men act pathetic and roll over to show their fat belly’s… it’s unnerving at the least
I have done my homework that included sort of a OJT real life experiences. I also did the homework on the facts that coincide with my own experiences. I never relied on bogus statistics unless they added up to what I have seen with my very own eyes and they match up to reality. And I know women and blacks call themselves the real victims but are they really? Who is vilified by main stream media and unholy whorellywood and society the most men are and in particular white men.
And who was passed over for the job? Well that would be me in the year of 1984/85 when I applied for the jobs and was told they were only hiring women and minorities are strictly hiring women. Yes in deed that happened and I could easily prove it too.
And no I didn't lose any children because I am a straight white man and straight white men aren't allowed to adopt children because we are all assumed in part by feminist and society as villains and predators because we were born men. I can't even go near children without causing alarm and I TOOK CARE OF CHILDREN not my own wanted to adopt one that I had for months.
As far as marriage and dating when. I had two serious relationships and I regretted them both. One went around stating I was her temporary until something better came along always hinting at cheating and the second one was caught cheating and I saw back then how no one would have taken my side for anything hints why the last dating relationship was many years ago.
And as for the subject of rape all guys have to do is look at a girl the wrong way or in a way she considers offended and it's treated as rape. And should a guy accidentally brush against a girl he's had it he is done just refer to Metoo where millions of women cried rape. PART 1.
And furthermore men are false witnessed against in order women can gain child custody and that is even advocated for and pushed by lawyers and the system a lot of it caught on video. Again if women would have done their homework they would have figured out that it's not women who are the victims it's men and all very easily provable. But then again men weren't worth the time and effort it took to figure that out.
https://www.bitchute.com/video/M-Dtcvqcjc8/
PART 2
Tons of paperwork? Stressful? Lol
I think they're pretty even there. If I marry a man, I'm keeping my last name. If it's "so important" that we have the same last name, he's free to take mine
I'd be fine with letting the women I marry keep her last name as for the ring I found a gold right with a 10k Dimond in it so I'll probably get a guy to refurbish it and give her that
Ring not right
10k tbh I’d probably be annoyed if he spent that much 😭 I more mean like 1k or so
I think 10k is just the Dimond rating it's not worth 10 thousand bucks