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If a woman breaks off the engagement should she give the ring back?
Superb Opinion
- 2.4K opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.
u An engagement ring is given in contemplation of marriage and the law treats this as a gift subject to a condition subsequent. If I give you a gift of my piano with the condition that you must perform a concert at a specified location within one year of the gift, then the piano is yours 1) forever if you perform the concert, or 2) until one year passes and you have not performed the concert, at which time I am entitled to have the piano returned to me. If you refuse, I can file a petition for replevin, the court will order you to return the piano and, if you fail to do so, the judge will sign a writ of possession directing the sheriff to enter the premises where the piano is located, to take possession of the piano, and to return it to me.
This same law applies to the engagement ring. As a practical matter, many guys do not want a ring returned, many of these rings do not have sufficient value to justify the expense of going through the legal process, and many guys are simply ignorant of the law. And filing a lawsuit for return of the engagement ring just adds to the pain of the cancelled engagement, but. . . the legal procedures are there if someone wants to pursue it.
This law, to the best of my knowledge, is universal in the US and I believe this is also the law in the UK.
Most Helpful Opinions
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An engagement ring is not a gift (a lot of people make this false assumption). It is a symbol of (long-term) commitment. By offering it, one partner asserts his/her love, dedication, and commitment to the other. By accepting it, the recipient acknowledges his/her partner's love, dedication, and commitment, and purposes to return it in kind. Breaking off the engagement means that one (or both) partners are no longer committed to the other, and thus the ring (as a symbol of commitment) should be returned, since it no longer serves it's purpose.
I personally think it doesn't matter who calls off the engagement. If a wedding is not happening, the ring should always be returned regardless of who called it off (since it is not a gift).
It might help if people started thinking of engagement rings like company cars. You don't get to keep the car if you get fired or quit, so why should you keep the ring if you don't get married?
If she broke it off just because she changed her mind, definitely...
If he cheated or was abusive and she broke the engagement for those reasons, then I'd say it's at her discretion if she keeps or gives it back.. Me personally, I'd give it back.. I wouldn't want a ring from a cheater or abuser... I know some people will say you could sell it but I wouldn't want money from a cheater or abuser either.. That's just me though
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Absolutely! Unless the man specifically says he doesn't want it. I had that situation once. I offered to give it back, but he said it would make him more upset to have it around. So I did a release ceremony and let it go into the ocean. It would not have felt right to sell it.
What Girls & Guys Said
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Opinion
53Opinion
- 620 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.
She's legally obligated to. An engagement ring is legally part of a quid pro quo obligation.
"Quid pro quo" means "this for that". It's a formal exchange of the form "If I do this, then you promise to do that." or "If you do this, then I promise to do that."
The phrase "If you scratch my back, then I'll scratch yours." is a classic example of a suggested quid pro quo.
An engagement ring and subsequent marriage is another classic example of a quid pro quo.
So, if she accepts the engagement ring, then she is indicating that she's entering the marital quid pro quo - that she will marry him, because he gave her an engagement ring and she accepted. So, if she calls off the engagement, she is terminating the quid pro quo and must give back the ring. If she doesn't, then she's in violation of the quid pro quo and that's a problem legally because her keeping it could be considered as a type of fraud. -
If a woman breaks off an engagement and refuses to give back the ring, especially if it was passed down through the guys family… then she’s worse than the scum under my shoes and a classified gold digger (or Ho (known or not known)). She has no rights to that ring if no one says “I do”.
Unless the guy does something horribly wrong and disgusting, and/or the whole family on his side is garbage, then if 2 wrongs equals a right to you, do you.
If the guy did something wrong but his family is decent and caring, then return the ring. It could be used for another son or nephew to wed his love.
But just to be a decent person altogether, just return the ring. Sometimes, things are realized at the last minute and it’s just not meant to be.
If she does out of spite because she feels entitled, and she’s a classic bridezilla, then she REALLY needs to see the inside of a court room and then he needs to swallow the red pill. -
Yes, she should. That ring is a symbol of commitment and that commitment is to be his partner through life which should not be taken lightly.
A stable and sound man will make that plunge for a woman who he believes earned the right to be by his side through life and if she refuses, she has no tight to keep that ring or wear it as it is his gift to her. She doesn't want it, she can't keep it. Then he can either get his money back or save it for a better woman down the line. -
Yes - unless he lied about his situation to influence her decision to marry him and to get her to spend a lot of money that he can't or won't repay in which case the ring is compensation.
Asking a woman to marry you isn't risk free tho. I don't get it when guys have low confidence in her commitment level but they invest a lot in a ring. I'd say, don't even marry her if she's not begging you for that AND she's earned the "wife material" status in your mind. -
It’s only right that a woman give back the engagement ring if the marriage does not go ahead as the ring is a promise to marry and when she accepts the ring she accepts the promise and well it’s just good manners. The legality of the issue is a whole different matter and for the courts to decide. Personally speaking I would not expect it’s return nor would I want it
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It's not a case of "should", most states have specific laws- often called Breach of Promise, regarding the return of an engagement ring. In most states the recipient must return the engagement ring if the wedding is called off, regardless of the reason for the breakup. If she doesn't return it, sue her for the cash value. That eliminates the claim of "I lost it/it was stolen."
- 378 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic. u
this is yet another... thing that people in relationships should talk about with one another, communication is key... during, before and after situations... just talk things through with whoever you are and then you will be a lot less likely to make impulsive, sudden decisions or find yourself in situations where you just feel like "now what the hell do I do"
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ABSOLUTLY NO, that will mean she doesn't even respect the time that we had it togeder and make me and her it whas a whaste of time been togeder whit no real feeling from her for us.
If a girl will ever do that to me i will 100% slap her face.
She should keep the ring and brake up whit me, face to face, phone, apologizes, excises and so on... -
Absolutely.
The whole point of a ring is to symbolize their commitment to be with each other as they start a new chapter in their lives. -
The ring is a symbol of the man's promise to love, care and protect the woman❤️ so if she doesn't want to be the potential wife🙅 then she shouldn't keep the man's "promise" aka the ring.
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if she break sit off, she should return it. the ring is a symbol of love and of commitment to that person and the promise of death do you part
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Yes, they should. My ex never gave it back… but I didn’t make a big deal out of it because it probably had evil spirits in it after she wore it. She probably turned it into a horcrux, I don't know, I wouldn’t want that thing around me anyway.
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Well I don't know,
Isn't it like a gift in a way?
If i bought an expensive pair of shoes for ya and you dumped me should i get the shoes? -
What is the point of keeping the ring if you have rejected the man who gave it to you. You accepted it as a promise of marriage that you agreed to. You dumped him. Now you want to keep the ring? Selfish and wrong.
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We already shared a bank account when we got engaged, we bought a ring for me and a necklace for him. If we did split up back then, we'd each keep our own jewellery, just like we both kept our wedding rings after the divorce.
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I think thats just a necessity
**stormy night on bridge**
MARTHA
I Just can't do this anymore DERYL ! The engagement's off !
Deryl
Nooo Marthaaaaaaaa !!
Martha drops the ring into Deryl's hand
Martha
Goodbye !
Martha runs past Deryl
Tragic. -
Yes, why would you keep it? When my mom broke off her engagement. She returned back.
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Yes, of course.
I can see how she might not if he deceived her in some way etc and then she could throw it away. But it would have to be very serious to do something like that.
But in no case should she keep it or profit in any way from having it. -
Yes. When my ex broke of the engagement I gave the ring back. Why would you want to keep something that doesn’t present love
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I believe it's proper to give it back if you end it being the woman, but if he ends it you keep it, unless it's a family heirloom.
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