Would you want to be with a man so out of control with his money that he spends huge amounts on jewelry without the forethought to save that money to care for the needs of his family when hard times arrive. Not if they arrive, when they arrive.
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Not what I said. I’m talking about a reasonable amount. If he makes 60k a year, it shouldn’t be unreasonable to want a ring that cost more than 100$
Unless it’s an extremely expensive ring >$10K, it’s not unreasonable to ask for a decent ring that, you know, she gets to wear ‘til death do you part.
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That’s all I’m saying. I feel like 1000 isn’t that much to ask and I was trying to put it into perspective with bringing up the fact she gives up her name 🤷♀️
That is a rather weird comparison. I know a lot of women who kept their name, usually because they have some sort of professional certifications in that name and don't want to bother changing it.
Why would either party agree to marriage at that point? The price of the ring doesn't actually matter, it's more so the quality of marriage expected. Our ancestors in the Great Depression weren't proposing with equivalent $5000 rings today.
Maiden name are symbolic and the only reason s woman should have to keep one is due to name prominence, such as if she is part of a family business/firm. Otherwise it's not worth keeping especially as far as traiftion is concerned.
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Why wouldn’t it be worth it? What if your last name sounds ugly with hers? Her last name connects her to her father, her heritage. Giving a nice ring is more about being selfless. Taking some time to stop spending so much money on yourself and to save for a few weeks to get her something of good quality. But your comment has already shown me you’re not really capable of looking beyond yourself so don’t bother 🤷♀️
1. What do you think a Maiden name is for? The last name doesn't disappear after marriage it becomes the middle name and preserves it. 2. It isn't about selfless behavior but the opposite, one shouldn't be stingy and buy the cheapest ring but if truly wanting marriage that money could go towards wedding expenses, a home down payment, etc. Clearly you do not know how expensive a "good" engagement ring is and for most men it takes a few months, not weeks, to hit the "2 months salary" rule. So if you're already paying rent, for a car, etc. Now throw in a payment of 2 months your income in there on a ring not before deductions and taxes. For me that would be about a $15,000 engagement ring. Now does that sound reasonable at all vs say, a $5-6k ring? Obviously not, it's irrational and I make a lot more than the average man.
This is real life not a Hallmark movie. Marriage is a religious sacrament and things like how expensive an engagement ring are do not matter.
I’m just talking about a ring that’s 1k. My issue is how many guys wanna get away with a 50$ ring. It’s cheep and clear they just wanna spend money on themselves
If you see your relationship as purely transactional, I suppose you could call it fair to ask for a decent ring in return for taking their last name, though neither of you seem to actually care about each other or be a good fit if you have to compromise to make it work.
I don't marry him just to get the "perfect" ring. I marry him for who he is and how he makes me feel. I see no issue with giving up my maiden name (even though it's special) to have my husband's, whom I'd love wholeheartedly.
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I’m talking about men who give a 10$ ring then demand the name be taken
You said "are you also fine with her and your kids not taking your last name?" as if that's comparable. One is based on tradition, the other is based on where you are economically. Just because you take someones name doesn't mean you are entitled to a ring worth as much as your house
Yeah based on where you are economically. So if he’s making 60k a year and gives you a ten dollar ring that would be pretty disrespectful no? Who said that much lmaooooooooooooo
It's less about the price and more about what it represents and whether the woman simply likes how it looks. You can find beautiful rings for only a few hundred, nevermind getting a diamond or some other such rock that has inflated prices for thousands
What does it matter what kind of ring you have, you got a ring, you are going to get married, you found a guy that loves you and wants to marry you and all you can think of is you got a crappy ring.
If you don't want to change your name then dont
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When he spends thousands on video games, he can save up a few hundred for a decent ring 🤨
If your last name ids more important than a ring then keep your last name and have someone else’s kids. If the amount of money being spent on you is what is important to you then gold dig somewhere else. A ring is important but love is more important.
I’m not talking about that, if you wanna be a progressive modern liberal type then that’s fine. I’m talking about men who claim to want to be traditional and conservative but only when it comes to convenient standards to them.
It's pretty hard to take those guys seriously. They just want a cook and a convenient sex partner who won't cheat on them or argue with them. Good luck to them with all of that nonsense.
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Would you want to be with a man so out of control with his money that he spends huge amounts on jewelry without the forethought to save that money to care for the needs of his family when hard times arrive. Not if they arrive, when they arrive.
Not what I said. I’m talking about a reasonable amount. If he makes 60k a year, it shouldn’t be unreasonable to want a ring that cost more than 100$
From your replies this seems less about the ring and more about the last name
Nope
A "decent ring" is one that has SENTIMENTAL value, NOT monetary value. In some,
countries, married women DON'T wear a ring at all.
In my country, women DON'T give up their maiden name and CAN take a married name as well or NOT!
Do they also give the kids her name?
Yes, they can if they want.
A LIT of people have a double name. In some cultures, you have 3 or 4 names!
LOT***
I don’t mean double name I mean hers
Possible
Unless it’s an extremely expensive ring >$10K, it’s not unreasonable to ask for a decent ring that, you know, she gets to wear ‘til death do you part.
That’s all I’m saying. I feel like 1000 isn’t that much to ask and I was trying to put it into perspective with bringing up the fact she gives up her name 🤷♀️
That is a rather weird comparison. I know a lot of women who kept their name, usually because they have some sort of professional certifications in that name and don't want to bother changing it.
Who gives up their name these days? Most people keep their names and family names. The names of the kids depends on the parents' agreement.
Why would either party agree to marriage at that point? The price of the ring doesn't actually matter, it's more so the quality of marriage expected. Our ancestors in the Great Depression weren't proposing with equivalent $5000 rings today.
Maiden name are symbolic and the only reason s woman should have to keep one is due to name prominence, such as if she is part of a family business/firm. Otherwise it's not worth keeping especially as far as traiftion is concerned.
Why wouldn’t it be worth it? What if your last name sounds ugly with hers? Her last name connects her to her father, her heritage. Giving a nice ring is more about being selfless. Taking some time to stop spending so much money on yourself and to save for a few weeks to get her something of good quality.
But your comment has already shown me you’re not really capable of looking beyond yourself so don’t bother 🤷♀️
1. What do you think a Maiden name is for? The last name doesn't disappear after marriage it becomes the middle name and preserves it.
2. It isn't about selfless behavior but the opposite, one shouldn't be stingy and buy the cheapest ring but if truly wanting marriage that money could go towards wedding expenses, a home down payment, etc. Clearly you do not know how expensive a "good" engagement ring is and for most men it takes a few months, not weeks, to hit the "2 months salary" rule. So if you're already paying rent, for a car, etc. Now throw in a payment of 2 months your income in there on a ring not before deductions and taxes. For me that would be about a $15,000 engagement ring. Now does that sound reasonable at all vs say, a $5-6k ring? Obviously not, it's irrational and I make a lot more than the average man.
This is real life not a Hallmark movie. Marriage is a religious sacrament and things like how expensive an engagement ring are do not matter.
Why would I give up my middle name 🤨
I’m just talking about a ring that’s 1k. My issue is how many guys wanna get away with a 50$ ring. It’s cheep and clear they just wanna spend money on themselves
If you see your relationship as purely transactional, I suppose you could call it fair to ask for a decent ring in return for taking their last name, though neither of you seem to actually care about each other or be a good fit if you have to compromise to make it work.
I don’t think that’s how transactions work
That's exactly how transactions work.
I'll buy her a nice ring and take her maiden name because I don't like my last name.
I don't marry him just to get the "perfect" ring. I marry him for who he is and how he makes me feel.
I see no issue with giving up my maiden name (even though it's special) to have my husband's, whom I'd love wholeheartedly.
I’m talking about men who give a 10$ ring then demand the name be taken
God bless you, your man is lucky to have you 👍
I don't really understand the big deal about not wanting to take the mans name. Its traditional, and what is the alternative?
Rather than taking your husbands name, you are just keeping your father's name lmao
That’s not what I was saying
You said "are you also fine with her and your kids not taking your last name?" as if that's comparable. One is based on tradition, the other is based on where you are economically. Just because you take someones name doesn't mean you are entitled to a ring worth as much as your house
Yeah based on where you are economically. So if he’s making 60k a year and gives you a ten dollar ring that would be pretty disrespectful no? Who said that much lmaooooooooooooo
It's less about the price and more about what it represents and whether the woman simply likes how it looks. You can find beautiful rings for only a few hundred, nevermind getting a diamond or some other such rock that has inflated prices for thousands
The two are not comparable, kiddo.
You need to be worth the ring, your name is worthless if no one is willing to take you.
Wow women really think guys are made of money.
What does it matter what kind of ring you have, you got a ring, you are going to get married, you found a guy that loves you and wants to marry you and all you can think of is you got a crappy ring.
If you don't want to change your name then dont
When he spends thousands on video games, he can save up a few hundred for a decent ring 🤨
I think you are confused, it costs up upto hundreds for new video games, it's cost thousands for rings
You don’t have a system for your games?
If your last name ids more important than a ring then keep your last name and have someone else’s kids.
If the amount of money being spent on you is what is important to you then gold dig somewhere else.
A ring is important but love is more important.
A last name is more important than a ring lol
It’s a ring. The important side of marriage needs to slip into focus.
Does this mean that if my wife does not take my last name, I don't have to buy a ring?
No, I was just trying to place it into perspective
And I was just teasing you. I'm sorry to be difficult.
I figured xD
Sharing a last name is really nice when you have kids together. What people consider a decent ring can really vary in opinion.
What? The things some people care more about end up being the reason they divorce not years later.
Or maybe it’s the fact that they both omit tradition and don’t care about what’s special to the other person is why divorce happens so much
Yeah, the point being one or both screw it up like willingly. A marriage does not dissolve by neither screwing anything up.
Exactly
When it comes to names and marriage, let's just say feminism is not compatible with marriage.
I agree
So basically you just want shiny useless "things" ? And what happened to keeping both your last names? Religious people are so bizzare..
I don't care about the last name, and I'm not going broke for a ring.
Cool, then im not talking about you
Fine and well. Some of us see past the scam.
I’m not talking about that, if you wanna be a progressive modern liberal type then that’s fine. I’m talking about men who claim to want to be traditional and conservative but only when it comes to convenient standards to them.
It's pretty hard to take those guys seriously. They just want a cook and a convenient sex partner who won't cheat on them or argue with them. Good luck to them with all of that nonsense.