Should I get married for money and security?

Question

Hi guys. It’s me again. And I’m having a dilemma so I thought I’d ask what your thoughts are.

For context, I am Middle Eastern and it’s normal for our families to introduce us to others for marriage. I can still get to know the guy before we decide to be together. It’s not forced or anything.

An opportunity has come up with a man who lives in Canada. This is beneficial because I hate my life here lol and I’ve always wanted to start fresh. He is also quite well off - a successful dentist with his own practice. This means I will have financial security and I will finally get married.

I’m 26 and in Middle Eastern timeline, the pressure is on me to be married. I’m watching all my childhood friends get married and it’s just me left.

I thought I would marry for love but every time things just haven’t worked out for me. I keep getting my heart broken and I honestly feel like it will never happen for me. I am still in love with someone from last Autumn but he ended things with me.

I’m wondering whether I should just get married to this man and start a new life. At least I am promised financial security.

Mr_twoface · Accepted Answer

GAG users without the middle eastern background will never understand what dilemma you are facing and the pressure from one's family. Obviously, the westernised mindset of marrying the love of your life is the correct way to go AND you know it too but the reality of parent’s involvement, their consent, our deep relationship with them etc. plays a major role here. Would your parents allow you to visit this man in Canada and get to know him on personal level? If so, make that happen and see where it takes you. Once you met him, your gut will tell you whether he’s the right path for you. If he it’s not, you seek elsewhere. If it is, then love can happen with time.

This whole idea of working your butt off and studying on your own is all good for those who are independent and don’t have parents looking and breathing over your shoulders.

Best of luck to you!

blondfrog · Accepted Answer

Don't bother explaining this to wester people especially North Americans. They will have no idea what your going through or even explaining to them. As far as they are concerned in their eyes you are going into an arranged marriage even though that's actually not what your thinking of. I am also middle eastern from Iraq. And I know what your going through. My parents are always trying to get me to get married. Hey I'd say take the chance but its not my life. I mean worst case scenario you moved to Canada and get married and it turns out it won't work you can divorce him and take half of his stuff including his money. Now you have a Canadians citizenship and still have a better life. I don't recommend this obviously, I'd much rather it ends up working out and you end falling in love with the dentist.

LazerBean · Accepted Answer

Definitely not, getting married for money is a terrible idea. But I totally understand being tempted to do it just to get out of your country. Probably the best thing you can do is just work your butt off and do what you need to move to another country yourself. At least in the United States, you would probably be able to get enough government help and work to survive long enough to get yourself through a nursing program and get a good job, if you play your cards right. Then you would be free to marry for love instead of money. Just my two cents, though. Good luck 🙂

Nikki1989 · Accepted Answer

Never rely on a man for any of that.

AviatorTom · Answer

There are many reasons why people get married. It's up to you to decide.

LiamS95 · Answer

Well you're certainly a very attractive woman assuming the profile pic is you. There has to be some attraction and emotional connection but Canada is a good country to live in. Do you think love could develop, a loveless marriage is headed for eventual failure, there are many things to consider of which you and you alone will be able to decide what is right for you. I wish you all the best and a happy life.

KostasKouvalis · Answer

Please don't do it. Aside from Canada not being a good place to live, you should marry someone because you love them and not marry out of desperation, and especially for money. Please don't become one of those people, and please don't cave to peer pressure. If you want, you should get to know him first and actually fall in love. But Canada is not a good place to live.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

Love is a combination of a series of chemical reactions and a series of choices. When you let the chemical reactions dictate your choices, you’re more likely to divorce. When you let your choices dictate those chemical reactions, you’re more likely to remain satisfied and maintain a committed relationship.
That’s kind of a convoluted way of saying you can learn to love anyone and you’ll be happier longer than if you’re impulsive.

Friendlybro79 · Answer

This is so hard to answer because of a few things. One we all might feel differently about this topic and then cultural differences in the mix make it more thought provoking.

I feel like meeting this person and seeing how it goes if say you spend a week with him (if that's something you can do). I've met friends with arranged marriages and they're great. My only suggestion is try to find both stability and love. You can have both.

exitseven · Answer

Anyone that marries for money will end up paying for it somewhere down the line

Anonymous · Answer

That’s a disaster that’s not love. That’s looking for opportunity so you can take it easy an easy way out and sleep all day and then don’t have to worry about any responsibility because he’s taking care of everything.

Tstrbrainer · Answer

Wouldn't that make you kind of a sugar baby?  Try to get to know this person. See if you like him and see if he's someone you want in your life.  Also make sure he knows to choke you 😉

NathanDavis · Answer

love does not exclude financial security lol...

DrPepper12 · Answer

Don't give up and fuck what "they" think. It's easy to fall for security but it's better to make your own.

ScattArrow · Answer

They've been a bit pickier these days. Lol for one if any how do I look post are anonymous they're almost guaranteed to be taken down lol. If you ask any questions about they're policies that gets taken down also

Staximus · Answer

You shouldn't be involved with any guy if you are still in love with another guy

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

Most people do but if you get married for that it won't last

war_daddy · Answer

not a bad move tbh. you're not really young anymore

Abdulwahh · Answer

Look it's important for a Muslim women to marry a man who is earning money?

Princesspd · Answer

Marriage is all about money and sex.

RedInnocent69 · Answer

No. That would be, insufficient.

soe11 · Answer

Why not.

jahaims · Answer

Nope.

Luckycharms12 · Answer

No never love by

Should I get married for money and security?

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