To be Strong and Independent 💪
This is about both men and women, but I will dig a little deeper into the strong an independent women to begin with.
I have read some guys here bash independent women. They might say that those women does not want any relationship because they aren't in need to commit. That in fact has nothing to do with being independent. To put it shortly: an independent person doesn't need anyone, because they are a complex person and have their own life - BUT they do want to be with someone too.
Not just anyone of course. In fact, that is the reason I think an independent persons love is more reliable than a dependent persons. They don't need you but they still choose to live with you - because they want you.
The saying "a strong and Independent woman" has a little negative rattle in it. It is often used with irony or a dash of sarcasm. When it comes to real independent and strong women they are often not being told to be that. Those women know they are that, but they do not have to walk around and yell it on the streets. Being strong on the inside will show even on the outside. Everyone will notice it - and this is what I think is the curse.
The Curse in It 🔥
When everyone notices you are independent and strong, they think they can act like shit. Yes, often it goes like that. Not always, because sometimes people appreciate those qualities and tries to show it. The ones who do not appreciate it too much are putting their worst behavior on the strong people. They think those are the ones who can take all of it. Of course a strong and independent person knows when to walk away and what to put up with and what not to, but it is not like they would not still feel bad. It is not like anyone - even the strongest guys - can take all the crap all the time.
We'll, they say "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". I want to say that this is partly true, because it is. We grow from our mistakes and learn from them. When it comes to someone else's mistakes I am not so sure if they always has the same impact on us.
Bullying, for example, makes even the strongest person collapse at one point. People have an impact on each other, and often it is bigger than we think.
Not to say that this is the curse of being independent and strong. No, this is just a part of it. The hardest part is dating. To put it bluntly: people tend to have either this idealistic picture of an independent person or the negative picture of them. So when it comes to dating they will either think the independent person is out of their league or then they see them as assholes.
Why It is a Good thing
Everyone of us knows that there are bad effects on being an strong an independent person. If the person is otherwise a bad person, being strong and independent will not change it for the better.
But there are a lot of good in it too, and to be a complete human being who enjoys their life fully I think you need to be both strong and independent. We are all growing to be a person like that. If we are good otherwise too, we get to grow even more amazing with the courage to be us without having to depend on others.
A strong and independent person has been the vulnerable and dependent person before. They have went through much since then. And they have grown and learnt. So in a way they are wiser. Maybe not on all levels, but emotionally they have some experience that has left its mark. It is a sign of living life fully. When you do not expect anything from others you will find happiness.
An independent person knows their worth and will not settle for anything less, that might be seen as a curse too. I see it as a power.
Thank you for reading! ⚡