Everytime I look up my own country, I come up with results for the top ten deadly animals, all being in Australia. I come up with ignorant people from the Northern hemisphere stating that I live in a dry, hot, bogon country where everyone drinks, swears and dies from snake bite or crocodile attack.
I don't.
I want to clear up a few misconceptions about my home for all the people who both don't live here, and have never been here.
First off- I don't live in a desert. My whole life I've either lived in one small town, which really wasn't that small, and now I'm living in Geelong city which is just that. A city like any other. And it's freezing. Back in Colac (my old home) our schools would give us the day off if temperatures rose above 35C (95F) and the heat would be humid. That's Victoria though. Perth, in WA, is bloody boiling. It's a dry heat over there and the time I visited was in the middle of a two week long heat wave, of 35C and up. Dry heat is a lot worse than humid heat.
Second- Nobody rides kangaroos. We don't own kangaroos. They're not pets, they're not cute and cuddly, I've seen one growl at an idiot who thought walking right up to it was a good idea. It's not. Do you know how much strength they have in those legs and tails? They're like super kick boxers. You don't want one of those buggers angry at you, or going over the hood of your car. If you hit one, chances are the kangaroo will be fine. Your car will not.
Third- If you see a koala on the road, don't stop on the bend and walk right up to it, and especially don't get your three year old kid to pat its back. Koalas are less cute and cuddly than kangaroos. Have you seen those claws? My Outdoor Ed. teacher was driving on the GOR one day and had to stop because there were a bunch of tourists who had decided to go up to the koala on the road, surround it, and start patting it. Koalas are wild creatures. They better be glad they found one who was pretty relaxed, otherwise that three year old? Yeah his face would have been gone. And furthermore, they're not bears.
Fourth- Drop bears. Bunyips. They do not exist. Drop bears originated from one guy having a koala fall out of a tree and happen to land on his head or something. Like I stated before, koalas are not cute and cuddly. I'm pretty sure that guy lost his face. And vegemite is not a repellent for drop bears. I don't know shit about the bunyip myth. So just know they aren't real.
Fifth- I go to a great school. I get just as good education as the rest of you. I don't even know where it comes from that we have less education than whichever country it is that thinks they're better.
Sixth- We don't all drink. Most of us do, there is a thing that you're not truly Aussie if you haven't gotten drunk before you're eighteen. But then there's a thing that you're not truly Aussie if you don't like vegemite. But we aren't all like that. That's more for the people who have families that you need to be drunk to get along with.
Seventh- We're not as accepting a country as people seems to think we are. Sure we're the 'free country' and all, but do you know how many people are getting jacked with all these religious folk coming in and screwing up our shit? I mean seriously, my primary school can't celebrate Christmas anymore just because you think it's offensive? I think it's offensive that you're taking away our celebrations. Don't like it? Fuck off to your own country. I am not going to start wearing a supid... whatever it is your women have to wear to cover their faces just because you say so. (and yes, they're trying to do that to us now. Not so free a country now is it? We're being over taken by dicks who torture animals for fun)
I would come up with more if I could think of more. But if anyone has any questions or wants to tell me I'm wrong, feel free.
If I get enough feedback I might feel motivated enough to make another with more points.
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