Is my life over?

[Anonymous]

My ex abused me and left me with $15k of credit card debt that is mostly his, like his car insurance. Since he had no credit but a bunch of money and I had perfect credit. I also have $60k of student debt but it is deferred with 0 interest because I'm so poor.

I moved to be closer to his dying mom and he promised he'd get us a house but instead he bought drugs and a luxury vehicle for himself. He changed into a completely different person from the grief of his mom getting sick. Even his friends are in shock.

I quit my job to move for him and I haven't found a new one.

I got diagnosed with ADHD and Autism as an adult so there isn't even much help for me now. I am too poor to afford my ADHD medication and it is out of control. I developed an eating disorder from stress.

I lost both my cats because I had to move in with my mom and she let them be outdoor cats against my wishes. One got hit by a car and I haven't been myself since.

I can technically divorce my ex but he has basically gambled away our joint funds. A judge could force him to take out a loan so he can pay me my half but that would ruin his life. He only originally got the money by investing household funds without telling me so he'd be in a lot of trouble. I trusted him because he was my first love/high school sweetheart.

I'm entering my late 20s and I'm above average pretty but that's all I have going for me, I have no career.

My mom is a narcissist who allows me to have no boundaries of my own and smokes inside all day. So I have no privacy and I'm super depressed.

I am the caretaker for my family member who is morbidly obese and has toilet accidents and is losing her mind so she has delusions.

I have no car and I don't know how to drive since my parents never taught me and I could never afford lessons. I am honestly considering applying for M. A. I. D. for mental health reasons so that I can end things on my own terms in the spring.

What would you do?

[Hulk_kitty]

Life is not over for you, unless you decide its over. Get your priorities straight first. Yes you have a lot of problems going on, but don't try and solve all of them at the same time, it will overwhelm you.

First get yourself a job, So you can get your freedom back, and move out from your mum. Then start paying off your credit card slowly until you are financial able to do so. 15K isn't much in the grand scheme of things.

Also you need stop feeling depressed about your situation, because that will not help you, will not improve your situation.

My uncle is very rich, he said something to me, which changed my life. You need to be solution orientated to get on in this world, don't blame, don't make excuses. If you have a problem, think of solutions.

Best solution for your problem get yourself a job asap. Once you have a job, you work on improving your life from them on.

[Asker]

Yeah I probably need to read some stoicism. I'm just so embarrassed that I was able to be used like that.

[Hulk_kitty]

Nothing to be embarrassed about, it can happen to anyone, the lesson from this, don't lend anyone huge amounts of money.

[Hulk_kitty]

Don't worry about stoicism, just get moving and and start doing things to improve your life. Self pity is not going to help you, just make your situation worse. Only you can make your life better, no one is going to do that for you. Its flaming hard, and a struggle, nothing in life is easy, there is a lot of suffering a pain. But you need to be tough to survive.

[Hulk_kitty]

I do not believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they cannot find them, they make them.
George bernard shaw. True quote

[Danny_dan92]

Get a job, if needed. 2




Work towards paying off your debt.




Improve your credit. Seek a trade to learn and go from there

[Anonymous]

Nope, it is a bad situation; but you can dig your way out of it. If you can get him to take responsibility for the debt he ran up you should. It won't ruin his life for him to take responsibility for his actions.

[Asker]

Yeah, I don't know why I feel so bad for him, probably because his mom is dying but he's too busy running around with his former prostitute girlfriend he got with a week after we broke up to even spend time with her. And he certainly doesn't feel bad for me.

[joeldalton]

Stop worrying about "ruining his life" Get what is yours, and get your life in order. There's zero reason to end your life.

[Asker]

I guess I'm scared that people will see me as some evil vindictive bitch or something because his mom is dying and he's obviously in a lot of pain. But I guess if I were in his shoes I wouldn't behave anywhere near the same way so it's no excuse.

[joeldalton]

who cares?

[jayhams]

Only read like half of this mess. Take him to court or file bankruptcy

[Anonymous]

Man this would make a good country song.

[Asker]

I haven't slashed his tires though lol