Why doesn’t anybody like me? Is it because I’m autistic?

[Anonymous]

I never understood, I am polite, kind and very helpful but some people think I give a bad vibe or something is off about me. I can be shy and quiet at times but it doesn’t mean I don’t care or I’m cold. As a kid I got diagnosed with autism at age 7. Not a lot of kids wanted to play with me. I was disliked a LOT during school. I’ve had friends but they ditch me. Middle school was horrible and high school wasn’t any better. I had a friend since 8th grade and until 11th grade, we were the best of friends. She started hanging out with other girls and started ignoring me. I tried to talk to her and asked what did I do but not a word. I chased after her and my parents told me to let her go and she wasn’t a friend. My parents kept warning me not everyone is my friend and I’m so stubborn and I won’t listen. I didn’t wanna be the loser with no friends. Even my classmates in special education don’t really talk to me. They think I’m too stuck up, rude, and make them feel dumb by knowing more stuff then that do since I’m more advanced. One of them said I have a huge ego.
People get upset when I make the conversations about me when they speak about their experiences. I only did it to relate to them. They just stop talking, frown or walk away when I do that. Even at work most of the students don’t speak to me. I got ignored by a couple of students today at my job. I said hi to them but they ignored me and passed by me and said hi to the other teachers and hugged them. I act like it didn’t bug me but it really did and hurt me. Even some of my coworkers don’t really talk to me either. Some do. I don’t know if my autism is the reason or is it because of my height. I’m a tall girl at 5’10” and thick and overweight. This one coworker who is also autistic isn’t interested in getting to know me. I thought since we were both autistic, we could get to know each other and be friends since I can relate to her. Why doesn’t anybody like me?

[Mansearching]

Its not that they don't like you.

Its because of the autism. They don't know how to act, talk, or treat you.

Some people are just that way. I don't know how to help anymore than that. But your parents are right. Not ev1 is or will be your friend. They will take advantage of you. I will not surgar coat things. I will be totally honest. I will put things in terms that can be understood by the person's abilities.

If i was to brutal, i apologize. But its simplest way to say it.

One more thing, STAY POSITIVE. NEVER EVER SAY YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH. YOUR HUMAN. NO ONE IS BETTER THAN YOU. NOT ME OR ANYONE ELSE ON G@G. YOU'RE THE BEST YOU, YOU CAN BE. Understand?

[Asker]

I knew it. I’m not surprised it’s my autism. I HATE having it and to tall you the truth, it ruined my life! If I wasn’t autistic, I wouldn’t have this fucking problem. Even people who are non autistic have this problem but nobody understands. So sick of being reminded of thing I already know. I have no friends and even some of my relatives don’t really talk to me. Some do but I don’t have much friends anymore and dumped me. I have a classmate (SPED ED) that’s autistic and he has a lot of friends. I don’t understand why I don’t. Everyone seems to be more brutally blunt with me than my older siblings who aren’t autistic. I’m not close with my siblings but they’re close to each other.
I try to be the best version of myself but it doesn’t work that way.

[Mansearching]

You might see a psychologist to see if there is an underlining thing you're doing that you're not noticing that you're doing. I've done that and put people off. Not your fault. Find out what "that" is and you'll be fine.

[Asker]

Are you autistic too?

[Mansearching]

No. I'm not. But my niece is a special child. She's adopted. Her birth mother, not my sister-in-law, did drugs while pregnant. So it made her that way.

I'm not saying your did. Not at all. I just saying i understand where you're coming from.

[bingbongbangbung]

If I had to guess, it's probably a combination of you behaving inappropriately in a social context, as well as you not being attractive enough. I too have ASD (diagnosed with Asperger's a few months ago, sort of misdiagnosed a few years ago) and a lot of people I interacted with despised me for being "weird".

[Asker]

What do you mean not attractive enough?

[bingbongbangbung]

You mentioned you're 5'10 and overweight. Most men prefer shorter and thinner women (not necessarily underweight).

[Asker]

Well yeah that’s true. That’s probably why I never get dates. What about tall and thinner women? No because men don’t like tall women.

[bingbongbangbung]

as long as you're not like 6ft or taller, then i don't think men would feel intimidated.

[Asker]

I’m 5’10” I feel bad for the women 6ft and taller.

[bingbongbangbung]

thanks for MHO

[FreyaRed]

People are fascinated by good looking assholes. I was raised by a psychopathic mother and I don't have much emotions but I'm good observer and adopt easily into a group of people. Generally people reject often others with good intentions but accept bossy ones. Human nature is weird an illogical.

[Miah05]

So i seen first hand a lot of people who are shy get mistaken as rude or arrogant.

They assume the lack of interaction is a sign your think you are better than them

Eventhough that is not the case. People assume it.

[Danny_dan92]

You’re really gonna talk down to yourself like this?

[Asker]

I’m not trying to. It’s just the truth. Nobody likes being around me. It’s my autism. I know it.

[Danny_dan92]

Stop

[Asker]

I know it doesn’t sound great but what am I supposed to do? Sugarcoat my feelings. It’s obviously my autism that is driving people away. My parents tell me people are just going to take advantage of me and they’re only being nice to be because I’m special needs and probably don’t like me like I think they do.

[DextroShade]

Lose the weight, people will like you more especially guys.

[Asker]

Wow that was very rude….

[Asker]

Me being tall and fat makes people dislike me.

[DextroShade]

The truth is rarely polite.

[Asker]

When has the truth EVER been polite? NEVER. But saying something without someone asking you for an opinion is flat out mean.

[DextroShade]

By posting a question here you are asking for my opinion.

[Asker]

Men never like tall and big women.

[shortster]

I don't know; but it seems like a possibility when I have the same problems.

[Asker]

You’re autistic too?

[shortster]

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Do you ever ask about their experiences? Or confirm their experiences?