Girls: how should I try to meet new people and make new friends of the opposite gender?

[Gmars]

This may seem a bit cheesy, but I am absolutely terrified of communicating with the opposite gender outside of present friend groups or in a workplace setting, (even then I'm still nervous).

I've been really uptight recently and ultra-focused on my work and trying to start my career that I have practically lost all of my property social life (outside discord calls with a handful of friends since they are long distance) and want to try and revitalize it.

Right now I'm playing the ever so agonizing waiting game with my career so I have all this time that I'd rather spend meeting new people but don't know where to start or how to even meet and communicate with people. With men it's ass simple as 'actually meet a person, and the rest is second nature' but I clam up entirely around women. I have very little issue communicating with women at work (since we're on a completely professional level) but in public I dare not even open my mouth, even just to compliment someone on something, like the time I saw a cosplayer that I thought was really cool but couldn't say anything because I was scared.

There are 3 big things I'm afraid/unsure of:

1. Initial meeting, I don't know where I'd find new people and even if I do, I hesitate to initiate a conversation because I'm afraid of backlash, even though I would NEVER IN MY LIFE do anything inappropriate I don't know what the mind of the other person will think of just a simple conversation.

2. Trying to become friends, this I'm just completely clueless about, I don't know the best way to say "hey let's be friends" or something like that, and I'm afraid of rejection or even hostility

3. Maintenance, I'm afraid of maintaining friendships, even my current ones. And with a women it will probably be even harder. I don't want to accidentally say or do something that might cause tension.

I know it's a lot to ask but I'm at my wits end over this. I really don't know where to turn to. Any advice is welcome.

Updates

8 d

I should mention that I suffer from Asperger's syndrome and as such have difficulty perceiving conversations in social settings as well.

[SecretsofKB]

Frankly, you need to stop putting so much pressure on yourself about making friends with women.

I think the reason you do well in a professional setting versus a public setting is that in your work, you have no expectations of you interactions with the women beyond work. In public, you are acting under the assumption that every interaction with women could lead to a friendship.

That is what puts pressure on you and your interactions with women.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Meet people, period. Go out more, regularly, ideally to the same place. And if you’re wanting feminine friends I would strongly encourage you to make sure you don’t pick them based on how attracted you are to them or how great the potential is for dating them, because that’s not being a friend that’s incel shit. Find your local gay bar and connect with some lesbians who will never get in bed with you.