There's been some talk on here about password sharing and I've noticed a number of people suggesting that "Sharing your passwords isn't a big deal if you have nothing to hide". This take will be a counterargument to this belief that privacy = selfishness and a cause for suspicion.
Point I: Why my account security matters to me.
Whether it be social media or online shopping, I create my accounts with specific purposes in mind and they don't include handing anybody a master key to my personal, financial, and professional information. I'm not just referring to the ability to view and track this information, I'm considering the ability to alter it as well. A few examples of accounts being abused by "the most trustworthy people" include:
-A teacher in High School's ex had access to his account and she added some students and sent them his nudes pretending to be him (there was an investigation and IT was able to trace it back to her, luckily for that teacher).
-My ex-friend's ex was narcissistic and threatened by her friends so he sent a bunch of flirtatious messages to their bf's.. He sabotaged a lot of her relationships.
-A friend of mines ex, was really insecure and would often lurk on his accounts but she was really good at sounding like him. She often locked him out of his accounts and led other girls on. You know how you can use certain accounts to log into others? i.e FB, Google, Twitter? She used one of his accounts to access an online shopping website and ran up a tab because "she felt disrespected by him".
- I've seen similar situations between "friends" too.
I've seen wayy too many situations like this to just brush it off. Security in a relationship works both ways. My concerns are valid too and any man who says "well you must be keeping something, then" is bloody right. I'm keeping my boundaries.
Point II: Why a lack of trust is a reason against my S/O having access to my private accounts.
I've mentioned this before but I'll break it down again. A lot of insecurity I've witnessed had more to do with the insecure party than the objects of their suspicion. Some people have a compulsive need to control those around them or else those people are deemed "untrustworthy".
I'm not a deceptive person and I make a point of transparency, but there's a point where my business becomes my own.
If my best friend is venting to me about her relationship, that's not for anyone else's amusement.
If I'm texting my manager, that shouldn't be a cause for suspicion.
If I have a voice message from my mom, why does it need to be screened?
Some levels of paranoia are intolerable.
Point III: Compromises I'd allow under the right circumstances.
If my boyfriend, had some understandable concerns about someone, I'd be willing to unlock my phone/PMs so that he could see my innocence for himself. Passwords exist for a reason, though, and I like my security, well... secure.
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