Stop Pretending You Don't Want Double Standards

...because you do. You do want double standards.

Stop Pretending You Don't Want Double Standards

This shouldn't take too long.

So something I noticed recently

is that most people complain about "double standards," while in the next breath completely ignoring the double standards that they like, because they benefit from them. Example: Guy with a high number complains about a girl he knows who is a hoe, about her putting out to lots of guys *who aren't him.* Not labeled a hoe (or male equivalent, "f--kboy," whatever).

Other example: Girl at bar complains loudly with much consternation about "I make 82 cents to your dollar!", whatever that's supposed to mean, while ignoring the drinks the bartender or guy at a table across the room just bought her for free (this just happened last night).

Other example: Girl complains online about never getting attention... while getting shit tons of attention on every photo she posts, that most guys can only dream about.

Other example: Dude out with friends loudly complains (loudly) about... girls who are loud.

Other example: Guy complains about female comedians sucking for using p-ssy jokes while ignoring all the male comedians who tell d-ck jokes (both are usually lame, to be fair).

Other example: Girl says guys suck for checking out girls while in a relationship; regularly checks out guys while she's in a relationship.

Stop Pretending You Don't Want Double Standards

...Yawn.

Can't we all just agree that people don't actually want all the equality, in every single aspect of life, that they purport to want whilst in the presence of polite company?

Yes, be polite and decent of course, but also: Be honest.

I'm not even saying I personally disagree with all double standards, because some of them, I don't. Most of them are crap, however. The difference at least between me and many others like me is *at least we're honest and don't complain about double standards in the first place.*

Some of them exist for a reason, and that reason is pretty simple: Boys and girls are different.

Thanks for reading. #doublestandards


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Anon-ymous1 is a GirlsAskGuys Editor
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Most Helpful Girls

  • The definition of a double standard is a rule that is unfairly applied.

    Boys and girls are different. They have different rules and expensive ectations as a result in some circumstances. So in golfing you have men’s tees and women’s tees, the women’s tees generally have shorter distance to green by rule. This isn’t a double standard this is a rule based on equity considering the general smaller stature and lighter skeletal features and musculature of women.
    .

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    • true, but 'equity' isn't a right people can demand and it should never be.

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    • @Chris_Humble that s is what happens when people confuse equity with sameness

    • @Chris_Humble I never said it was "most chicks." I said "all the chicks." That does not imply most.

Most Helpful Guys

  • Yes, I want double standards, and I grew up with a lot of "Grandmas, Great Aunts, Great Uncles" and people that lived through the Great Depression, and many that served in WWII.
    They all taught me, from a very young age, to respect, and honor women, and treat them well. Since then, that ideal has been questioned, and some have taken it to extremes.
    For me, it is a simple thing, that I just do, because I was taught to: Open a door; take her hand, in heals, on stairs; bring flowers on a date; and always respect, and not assume, or take advantage!
    Not that women are anything less than EQUALS, and NEED, my help, or assistance, but rather those that like that, and understand, it is part of respecting, and honoring her, as a Lady.
    Some want to serve in the military, and even combat roles. They should have that right to do that, but others shouldn't look down on the others, that choose to be mothers, and raise children, rather than just handing them off to nameless, faceless 'Child Care', as many seem to be pressured to do, maintaining a 'career path' and having a child, seems to somehow interrupt that path, in the minds of many!
    Yes, I want double standards, because we ARE DIFFERENT, but with certain parameters, without judgement.
    Men and women are different, so how can anyone assume that there is one Paradigm that fits both, perfectly? But just because there is a 'difference' does not mean that either is better, or superior to the other.

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    • That's quite a lot you wrote.

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    • What do you mean offend anyone? There's nothing offensive about it. And even if there was, people could get over it.

    • @ Anon-ymous1 By "Offending" I mean, you never know how someone is going to read an email, and how they will interpret it, from their life experience. I RARELY, hardly EVER, post anything to be more than just 'teasing' maybe 'questioning' and sometimes 'pushing the obvious lack of logic', but NEVER intentionally post something just to be hurtful.
      Sadly, some have misinterpreted some of mine, and felt hurt, when there was not intent meant.
      Emails, and chats are much harder to navigate, when there are so many cultures, and people from all around the world, and some language uncertainties, and so on!!

  • Nice take! Well done!

    I TOTALLY want double standards! I'm more than happy to have to focus on my career and make money and pay for the girl. I don't care if she has a major league career. But at the same time, I don't want to spend a ton of time dealing with the house and/or the kids. I'm not pretending to want that, but I am willing to provide in other areas. For all the people who complain I shouldn't look for someone to provide something I'm not providing I say this: I'm looking for a partner with epic tits, a tight waist, a bubble butt and a great vagina. I provide exactly NONE of those qualities into any relationship. But I hardly think it's unreasonable for me to look for those qualities in a partner! :D

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What Girls Said 19

  • Excuse me I have openly since we met wanted double standards..

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  • We’re not really different. Sorry to break it to you. These r all just societal constructs based on gender stereotypes. U can’t possibly say that getting free drinks at the bar, and not every woman does by the way, equates to earning 82 cents for a dollar. Plus, what if the woman isn’t an alcoholic?

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    • I also never complained about not getting enough attention, and I wouldn’t check out guys while in an EXCLUSIVE relationship. I don't know which girls you’ve been hanging out with, but not all girls do this. The other examples r guys by the way, and those double standards r also hypocritical.

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    • ... No, I asked where they came from. So, where did the "societal constructs based on gender stereotypes" come from.

    • "These r all just societal constructs based on gender stereotypes" millennial collage girl I assume :)

      Social constructs based on gender stereotypes sure patriarchy, mans-planing, misogyny, cisgender, trigger warning, male privilege and manspreading. I guess all words part of your vocabulary.

  • I agree. Men and woman are different and should be treated differently.

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  • just because you don't hate every single double standard that exists, doesn't mean you can apply that shit to everyone. Boys and girls being ~~different~~ means fuck all regarding this.

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    • No idea what you mean.

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    • Yes, it is, thank you. And you're wrong.

    • Lol no, but please explain why you think so

  • But I DON'T want double standards. I just want people to stop WHINING so much.

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    • I mostly don't want the whining as well, but most people (including you, probably) really do like the double standards that benefit them. They just don't acknowledge it.

    • Believe what you want. I would gladly get rid of all the double standards, both those that benefit me and those that don't. Double standards are everywhere and go both ways, and I don't think there's anyone who does not have at least one that benefits them... and one that doesn't. And I DON'T like to know that some of the advantages I get, I only get because someone else is being treated unfairly.

      It's so easy to just look at the advantages someone else gets at your cost, and then ignore/forget the ones you yourself get at their cost. And it's easy to just ignore wrongs and unfairness when they aren't done against YOU. And I try not to do that. Maybe I don't always succeed, but I do try.

    • You're right-- it is easy.

  • You beat me to it... I was just thinking of writing about this. Great my take by the way there are a ton of examples everywhere.

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  • I would actually like your MyTake if it wasn't a personal attsck on girls

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  • I believe you should not complain about something you yourself do. That would eliminate some on your list. There are differences, as there should be. But some things there should be equality in. Sometimes the lines are fuzzy and exceptions do exist, making the lines even more fuzzy.

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  • All this gender equality garbage is making me sick.

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  • So... are you saying you have no idea of what gender gap pay is? Or, are you merely trying to skirt around the fact that it exists. Because when you say "whatever that's supposed to mean" as a reply to a female saying "I make 82 cents to your dollar!" that's what it sounds like.
    And, to reference situations that take place socially; ie: free drinks at the bar, as some sort of 'making up' for being paid less in the in the work environment I find incredulous.

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    • As I said on another comment, I was aware of what she meant. By "whatever that's supposed to mean," I was merely implying that it's actually a much more complicated issue with many more variables and macroeconomic detail than her soundbite allowed for. Which is why that soundbite is always worthless, as most soundbites are.

    • Oh... gotcha, now I get you were just being dismissive of her, right? I mean by your own admission you said you understood what she meant. So by adding 'what ever that means' you were basically brushing that off.
      by the way, don't @ me with that garbage pertaining to socioeconomic nonsense, save your 50cwnt words for the non-educated. I'm majoring in BusAdmin, with a minor in Statistics, so I'm not impressed. By saying its complicated by variables & macroeconomic detail, you basically haven't told anyone anything.
      Gender gap pay has nothing to do with that. It's two people, one man one woman, with the same or basically equal skills and qualifications do the exact same job, producing the same results... yet, the woman makes less because she's a woman.
      #nicetry #notimpressed #youshouldbeashamed

    • Wow. Well then, you must be highly educated. Clearly this is an issue that is very important to you.

  • If someone has two biscuits. I will say. Hey you are only allowed one biscuit! But since you had another I will too.

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  • I want different standards for some things because we are inherently different but not double standards.

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  • By today’s mainstream i’d Probably be considered sexist... against women.

    I’m a woman. I don’t consider myself a sexist, just a realist.

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  • except i don't want double standards
    xx
    ~ Bloodrayne Absinthe Nevermore

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  • I just want people to fear God.

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    • Uh... okay.

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    • Your concern is Hell?

    • The fact is, most people do shit stuff because they believe that they can get away with it. So yes even though people should have sincerity from their hearts, not everyone does unfortunately so yeah.

  • Yes, we are all different and different brains

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  • good take

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  • Hmm.. well I think one can recognize problems caused by stereotypes without simultaneously acknowledging every stereotype which exists, including ones that benefit them.

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  • The fact that a guy wrote this makes me cringe twice as much

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What Guys Said 26

  • Yeah, that's women. They really don't even know what they want, and even if they do they'll change their mind. Just ask them!

    Watch what they do, not what they say.

    Women are like dems - they're all for what they're all for until it doesn't suit them any longer then they want to change it. :)

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    • I have no idea what that last part is supposed to mean, but uh okay.

    • Democrats - they do the same thing. They'll stand behind the constitution if it suits their agenda - if it doesn't they want to change it.

      A woman wants what she wants because she FEELZ like it. And highly likely to change her mind at any given moment. See my take on having a woman boss - they're horrible to work with for just this reason - nothing is static, always subject to change. It is ALWAYS about the FEELZ. :)

  • the "82 cents to your dollar" thing is actually talking about a problem proven many many times in every business.

    Girls are always paid a certain percentage (i forgot the exact percentage) LESS than men.

    So, i get what your saying but that's just a little explanation for you.

    The more educated you are, the better. :)

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    • I was aware what she meant. By "whatever that's supposed to mean," I was merely implying that it's actually a much more complicated issue with many more variables than her soundbite allowed for.

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    • @D_Bone_Steak As I said, in some ways it is true and in others it isn't, and it's a complex issue with many variables, which is why that soundbite is worthless.

    • @Anon-ymous1 I wouldn't even have wrote what I wrote if I'd seen you already responded to him... it was the "more educated you are" snarkiness that had me responding to him at all.

      I don't have a problem with the factoid or the convenient lack of all the information which a simple google search even tells you about... The snarky holier than thou shit though. That argument got shut down all the way back when Obama said it during a speech and was still president, but there's still plenty of retards just parroting that argument as if it seriously needs to change... They see the lack of equal outcome and assume there must not be equal opportunity, that must be the reason.

      But fuck it, you're right... that sound bite was worthless... at least to those of us that don't assume a lack of equal outcome just gotsta be because of a lack of equal opportunity.

  • Standards are good. Thus double standards must be double good.

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  • Men and women are different. We want different things in a partner, we experience dating in a different way, and we treat each other differently. A lot of this is rooted in our biology. These double standards will always exist for these reasons, this is why I think that obsessing over equality is silly.

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  • I'm not gonna write a super long and deep comment, but I just simply agree with all you wrote. Great post man.

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  • Everyone is a hypocrite at times, and they need other people to point it out. I think a problem is that people get too defensive when their double standards are pointed out because of the view that only ignorant people are hypocrites.

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  • My objective always has been very clear, i don't strive for equality i strive for what is most fair. In many cases that elevates double standards completely. But i agree that for a girl its not in her interest to want a single standard as it will be a horrible experience for them in the long run.

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  • It's gonna be extremely hard and probably take years to achieve that. And like you mentioned, some do exist for a reason. Mostly biological reasons because boys and girls are different.

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  • I dislike double standards. I like all things being equal.

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    • spoken like a true SJW

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    • that's your point of you.

    • @Chris_Humble I think you meant "That's your point of view." And don't hide behind that stupid bullshit when someone says something against you; that's idiotic.

  • I respectfully disagree with the premise of this article. I have no desire to be in control of any relationship I am, I want a true partnership. Yes men and women are different in some ways but we basically desire a lot of the same things. This article has way too much generalizing and does not reflect how I personally feel.

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    • ... Huh? Who's talking about relationships? This post is about double standards between the sexes. What do you mean?

  • Yea, I've never taken much issue with Double Standards as a whole. Only take issue with complaining about choice Double Standards. Either we accept that these differences exist and walk through the world with that understanding or we attack them all across the board evenly. We need to agree on the rules and nothing more.

    It's like unless we're going to make a movement for societal change then the double standard should just be highlighted and understood, rather than complaining about one and ignoring others.

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  • Despite your "hash tag" I completely agree with you.

    I've been under leadership from men and women.
    Men tend to fail in focus. Do, I?

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    • Hash tags are stupid but I used one to hopefully garner more attention to the post.

  • I don't do any of the "guy" stuff, myself, but every woman I know does all the "girl" stuff you mention. Sad world.

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  • Well, people want to be whiny no matter what, so I really try not to bother with it. Society is insignificant anyways.

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  • girls on this site bitch all the time

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  • Speak for thyself.

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  • Someone had to speak up

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  • Stop pretending I want double standards. I don't.

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  • Random hypotheticals don't prove anything.

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  • i want one standard

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