I am not a feminist. However, I am not afraid to stand up for the truth and I am not afraid to speak against what's wrong. I just don't want a label for myself. This is because labels come with stereotypes. I believe modern feminism has become a joke and definitely needs some improvement and self-reflection.
Modern feminism is no longer about real issues or serious issues, just petty debates like
1. why girls play with barbie dolls
2. why girls wear pink
3. why girls wear princess costumes
4. why heroes save women in films
5. why boys do bike stunts
6. why women cook
7. why photoshop is used
8. why magazines tell women how to dress, how to wear make-up, how to cook
My reaction is "no one is forcing a customer to buy a magazine," and in terms of Photoshop, "no one is forcing a woman to become a model." Then, there are petty debates on almost EVERYTHING you can think of. There are debates about topless rights, and my reaction is "why can't we debate on something more serious like human beings starving, dying and being homeless?"
It is good to question things but there is a limit to everything. It should not become an insanity. Also, many women have a victim mentality for NO reason. Many women don't even know the real definition of a "victim," "serious cause," and "feminism." It is like anyone who moans is a "feminist" and a lot of people are "rebels without a cause."
Now, since I am moaning about the fact feminism is not putting its energy, time and efforts on serious causes, I want to give examples of "serious" causes.
1. Female infanticide
2. Forced marriage
3. Domestic abuse
4. Child marriages
5. Young girls as young as 7 getting kidnapped and murdered
6. Human trafficking
7. Flesh trade, women forced into prostitution
9. Rape victims beings shamed and abandoned by the society just for being victims
10. Women not getting child custody- a husband has no right to snatch his children from their mother, children need their mother more, and a mother has more right on her children than a father because she carries the child in her womb for 9 months and give birth.
11. Women not getting divorced because they have no support from their families and are not financially independent
12. Women who are not allowed to have love marriage
13. Acid attacks (in one case a 15 year old got acid attack by her own parents just for staring at a guy)
14. Women getting murdered for saying no to a relationship or marriage
15. Honor Killings (women getting murdered for committing adultery, for getting in a relationship against their parent's wish) Yes, I know the word adultery does not exist in the western world but it still does in other worlds.
16. Women getting stoned for having extra-marital affairs.
Even though extra-marital affair is wrong but no one deserves to be murdered, the man can move the fuck on and divorce.
A lot of innocent women can be accused of cheating and a lot of rape victims are accused of lying and committing adultery. A lot of people believe that the punishment for adultery should be 100 lashes, and I am like one day they might say 200 lashes for getting drunk.
Even though I am a Muslim, an Asian and from a conservative family and society, I am not ashamed to highlight issues that Asian, Muslim and conservative women face. Recently, I heard about a woman getting shot by her brother just because she tried to run away with her boyfriend and she was not allowed to have a boyfriend in the name of fucking honor. Still, there were people almost trying to justify this including my own family members.
Her boyfriend got jailed, this shows that even the legal system even the police is backward. A boyfriend got jailed just for being a boyfriend and just for running away with his girlfriend. A lady got murdered just for falling in love and her boyfriend got jailed just for falling in love. I feel IMMENSE SADNESS and I feel like tearing up and crying because two lovers got separated and they had their entire lives ahead and they must have had beautiful dreams, plans and hopes for their future like everybody else.
Even in 2018, human beings especially women are not free to live their OWN lives. This makes me question, is the world really modern or do we still have a long way to go? Even though I am a Muslim, an Asian and from a conservative family but I am against compulsion, no one should force their religious or conservative ideas on others.
So, the conclusion is that it is not about feminism, it is how to use feminism. If feminism is used for serious causes, I will support feminism but if feminism is used for petty things then I will not support it.
One last thing, there are cases where women are considered victims even if they choose to do something. For example: if I choose to be a housewife, a full-time mother, if I choose to have an arranged marriage and if I choose to wear the Hijab, I am NOT a victim.