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"Victim Blaming" Why Do Some People Have This Blame The Victim Mindset? (Page 4)
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Well thanks to certian people trying to use the victim card as a means of making its difficult to start believing someone without proof now don't get me wrong if someone says they were the victim i always give them the benefit of being right instead of down right telling i don't believe cause you never know, u werent there to witness it so yea
Children of abuse don't usually lie... If anything they don't always say anything, they suffer the abuse in silence
never said everyone was lying i just meant certain people
So because, a few lie, doubt everyone who's not? The majority of people who say they're abused aren't lying, so why should they have to suffer further because off the minority who are lying? 🤔
Simply because we can't just take someones word and say they are correct how do u know if a adult is lying or not i could see if it were a child yea they aren't gonna lie but a teenage or older can and will so how do u tell if they are right or wrong
In this day and age... Lie detector for one! Bruises for another... People that have witnessed and chose to do nothing or keep silent is just another. . So to say there's no way is not really true
well what would u do if there was a way to stop all of this victim blaming how would u do it
Did I not answer that in last reply?
ok then well who knows
It's also called gaslighting, it's used by psychos and abusers.
Right
It’s easier and thus more popular than dealing with the perpetrator.
Which is so fucked up. I've seen on here more concern for men in prison who get raped, then innocent law abiding citizens. Truly sickening. Or the user on this thread who said if women act like a tease, no sympathy. What then about the little girls that get molested by family members? WTF is wrong with people
Small minds have been around since the beginning.
Yeah guess, guess just see more online these days.. Maybe why never used internet much before.. 🤷🏼♀️
The dumbest are the loudest.
🤣🤣 wait but I can get loud sometimes IRL so guess me not as smart as me thinks me is 🤣🤣🤣
because people refuse to see the facts, they got one thing stuck in their head and refuse to see both sides. If family and friends take the other side, then you got problems. You need to see both in order to make your decision
It is one thing if a child that has no way out is abused. However, for adults, in most situations, they choose to remain with the abuser and therefore can be blamed and certainly they don't deserve sympathy which only encourages them to stay in the abusive situation.
Honestly at that point i just wouldn't say anything, cause if its clear they screwed up and im just not allowed to criticize them for what they did wrong, they i'd rather just move on and let them wallow in their own self pity. I don't have the patience for people who have no intention of bettering themselves.
Victim blamers, nearly always, are very sympathetic to the attacker... sexist, racist little boys i. e. Trumptards
Of course, being weak cowards, they are never man enough to own up to it
Everybody blames SOME victims for their own misfortunes.
The same women who are quick to excoriate others for blaming female victims are the first ones to crucify male victims.
Funny you say that because I'm the only one bringing up the abuse can happen to makes and females.. But nice try there... Noone should suffer abuse Male or female... Noone should be blamed for being abused, Male or female and noone should be shamed Male or female!!
Right, but there's all different kinds of ways to abuse people and ways people can feel abused, and while you may pay lip service to the idea of sympathizing with men, I'm willing to bet that when it comes to judging actual individual cases, you'll always tend to see a woman's idea of abuse as inherently more legitimate than some whiny bitch man who is nothing but a crybaby compared to how brave and strong every woman has to be, etc.
I'm just saying, everybody likes to spout off a bunch of high-minded ideals about how unbiased they are, but when push comes to shove, everybody's a goddamned hypocrite and the worst ones are those who are the loudest about denying it.
Wow okay sure... You couldn't be more wrong, but okay... Can see how biased you are, and nothing can change that, so I'll just say, thanks for Your reply
www.usatoday.com/.../
If you were put in a position of power to mete out justice to abuse victims, you would heavily favor those who you sympathized with over those you have no sympathy for whatsoever.
That's your bias. There are people who have been abused horrifically but you don't see it as abuse or else you think they deserve it for the way they behave. It doesn't matter what the victim suffered, it only matters what you, the arbiter, perceive as suffering. That's all.
As a man, I know better than to expect sympathy from a female in real life no matter how long and how loud she pays lip service to the idea of being sympathetic towards men. That's just one more thing that's easy for women to say and easy for them to genuinely believe, but when the rubber meets the road, if I depend on you for sympathy, I'll be stranded for the rest of my life waiting for your platitudes to come true.
Good way to let your bias and hatred of all females color your perception of how/who people really are.. A closed mind will never grow/never learn. But okay, I'm not interested in being bashed because of my gender... Have a good day sir
Victim blaming thrives in societies where it's easier to soothe the conscience and to spare the heart than to face the mirror.
Victim is never guilty but maybe this happens because its pretty common to vulgarize crimes or situations, like if a guy looks at a girl's boobs and people pretend thats raping.
And because some situations could be avoided if the victim was a bit more cautious.
This made me cry. It hits very close to home.
Sorry for the tears... And sorry for the abuse you have suffered in life... I wish could edit or update mytakes... Because I was remiss in adding that people of abuse are not just victims... They're SURVIVORS! So don't victimize them and treat them like they're lesser or weak... When it takes real strength to survive and overcome 💜💜🤗
It has become part of their identity. They are able to predict the outcome and to them thats safe where as change would be more fearful because they dont know the outcome.
Evil people will always exist and we have to be vigilant and protect ourselves from them. Looking at how we could've avoided becoming victims is how we avoid becoming victims again. If people don't want to be introspective in that regard then they'll get little sympathy from me.
Tell that to an infant that gets shaken, or a little girl that gets molested by a family member, or a woman who gets attacked walking to her car. Your attitude is part of the problem. So if someone breaks into your home while you're at work, is it your fault? Abuse is a crime, blame the criminal not the victims!
That's the thing, you need to ask the question "is there anything I could've done differently?" Did I leave my doors unlocked? Did I leave valuables in plain sight? Maybe I should've chosen a better neighborhood to live in? The person who asks these things is less likely to get robbed a second time.
Children aren't really in control of their own fate the same way adults are. Adults almost always have the option to leave certain people or places if they endanger them.
No that's not always true but okay. .
But maybe society needs to do more about people committing crimes then blaming the victims... And crime don't just happen in bad neighborhoods... Do people should just pick up and move any time there's a crime... Do you realize how ridiculous that sounds? So when stores get robbed, banks get robbed, it's their fault too. Damn, share some of what you must be smoking 🤣🤣
Whatever, go ahead and continue thinking that it's everyone else's job to protect yourself if it makes you feel better. The reality is the average member of this "society" doesn't give a damn about you.
It's what a lot men like victims or potential ones always been that way that's how they like it to be and stay it's more normal than u think too.
just because you label someone a victim doesn't mean we agree
you have almost a religious use of the term victim blaming. they aren't victims just because you say they are
your entire post shows an extreme lack of ability to take the perspective of others
So if a child gets physically or sexually abused are they not victims of child abuse? So when a partner cheats, are they not victims of cheating... I think your whole reply shows either you didn't read the whole post or you're just very ignorant
@Brainsbeforebeauty see now the problem you are making is that i spoke generally and you are trying to force a specific example on me
No there problem is this post was about All abuse, not just women being raped, it was also bout people who's partner cheated, yet they get blamed... Yet men keep thinking of just women, cuz that's a way to still blame the woman. Makes it difficult to blame the child without looking like a POS. But, funny how some men will blame the Female instead of the criminal. She should of done this, she should of done that. But then can't the same be said to men who say they get fucked over by women and the courts? Shouldn't they have been more safe, took better precautions to not be in those situations?
you are jumping back and forth between specific examples and generalizations. your inability to remain consistent is indicative of someone who is just angry at a group of people (men) and your only emotional, there's no logic to it
you need to make sure the tense of everything your saying matches up, if i am speaking about generalizations you also need to avoid using any specific examples. i am having a conversation about the RULES of the concept, not examples
Since when is it A RULE to blame the victim? And no I'm not jumping all over, everything I've said minus make victims of the courts was in this mytake... Maybe you didn't read it all, or maybe you didn't comprehend what you read. . And nice try, I don't hate men. . Just the PEOPLE regardless of gender that put the blame other than where it belongs. But obviously you're more interested in trying to insult someone or their intelligence than have a conversation, but that's where it ends for me. But thanks for replying
i am talking about the rules of what defines victim blaming and what doesn't. the rules of rule utilitarianism more specifically
if you can't focus on the topic we can't have a meaningful discussion. that means looking at the concept of victim blaming WITHOUT specific examples in order to ascertain its actual properties. what is it? and perhaps more importantly for you what is it NOT?
www.usatoday.com/.../
again, specific examples are outside the scope of my conversation
Of course, anything that refuted what you say is 🤷🏼♀️
you aren't responding to my core argument thus you cannot be refuting it
you aren't a very smart woman
What core argument? You started with a personal attack from the get go:
"just because you label someone a victim doesn't mean we agree
you have almost a religious use of the term victim blaming. they aren't victims just because you say they are
your entire post shows an extreme lack of ability to take the perspective of others"
I gave real examples of abuse as did users who've suffered abuse, yet all you seem capable of is insults verses an actual conversation, yet say I'm not very smart? Smart enough to know done with petty insults by someone with nothing intelligent to add other than insults... But "thanks" for your "reply" ...
I think its because people get tired of others using the "victim card" for minor things.
A child beaten or molested by a parent not playing the victim card. A woman trapped in an abusive marriage where her husband controls the money and controls her is not playing the victim card. A women brutally raped is not playing the victim card. Are there people they do... Yeah a lot of times the abusers or criminals. Funny people excuses criminals they free up in a poor home they didn't know better, but turn around and blame victims... What's wing with that picture?
Agreed, but some people deliberately become victims to gain attention or for the purpose of having an excuse for their own behavior.
But don't blame or shame all victims for the actions of others
No of course not - and don't assume that an accusation with no evidence is true.
My guess would be because it's probably for the same reason that some people have the play the victim mindset.
Not everyone "playing" the victim tho... So when you treat real Survivors of abuse like it was their fault, that's just wrong... If people don't know what someone has really gone through, then maybe they should just say nothing. Little kids abused by their parents playing the victim? Our teenagers? Or survivors of physical abuse by a partner... I got a bright idea... How about blame the parent that abuses an innocent child. How about blame the people that would exploit and and abuse teenagers. How about blame the people that are guilty of physically abusing someone... 🤷🏼♀️🙄
Agreed, but that wasn't the question. The question simply ask why someone would persecute the victim. I honestly have no idea, my response was simply my best guess.
Okay. But your answer is focused on people playing the victim, When this take is about REAL survivors of abuse who then get blamed or shamed. The only blame or shame should be the ABUSER. Just because there are some that lie about abuse, why should real abuse survivors pay for the lies of others?
My answer is just an answer. It doesn't mean that it's the answer. I simply just posted a hypothetical response to a question on a public forum.
Okay then. Thanks for your reply
I agree with you that's an awful thing to do, victim blaming is never okay... Hopefully this type of thing stops soon
Also fantastic mytake!
Thank you
No problem BBB
Because it is easy , they won't fight against you because the society thinks the victim did something wrong , but as the society barks , whoever there is your loudness doesn't mean you are right and the victim is wrong , so suck it up!
Not sure but I hate it
Me too! And it really needs to stop.
I agree
👍👍