5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

It's a long Take, guys. Sorry! I've been trying to keep them short like my last few but had a lot of details here I really want to share.

These 5 great ways are not going to be your usual cookie-cutter concepts, rather they touch on some of the more simple things that can actually mean quite a lot in a woman's character. If they don't suit you, that's okay, but I think other guys could appreciate these points.

She stands up for you

Of course a guy can stand up for himself, we know that. And he always should. But there are times where a woman should be courageous and push back at people who are disrespecting a guy unnecessarily, which is not something you see that often anymore. This is a point that will probably matter most for guys in high school, college, or work related situations with a lot of young people.

When guys are in groups and there’s one girl in the middle, they love to one-up each other, or poke at the one guy they think is lesser than them or can see clearly he has a chance with her. They’re often those alpha assholes who don’t have anything else going for them but their smart mouths and maybe their looks, but they can see there’s that one guy in the group who isn’t an aggressive jerk but he’s not a weak beta male either. They can see he’s got something they don’t have or else they wouldn’t be targeting him like they do.

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

The value factor:

If the girl is the type to stand up for that guy or shoot back smart ass remarks at the assholes, then you’ve found a real diamond. That means she’s courageous and not afraid of what anybody thinks, and isn’t afraid of putting an asshole to shame either. It also means that she respects and regards you as a human being and respects you as a different kind of guy which is really important here.

Many women, but especially the young ones, will either laugh along with the varsity punks trying to make a fool of that one guy, or the worst: she will just stand there and say nothing or be silent, pulling out her phone to act like something else has her attention, pretending she doesn’t hear it. These are the cowardly women who probably do think the varsity alphas are real jerks but they’re secretly afraid of making them upset. Or she secretly loves them and finds it hot that they’re sarcastic or disrespecting others, so they will try to act neutral in the situation. But the even worse part? If you do stand up for yourself and shoot back at those punks, especially in a way that really hits them where it hurts, she will think you are being the jerk.

That’s not the kind of girl you want, even if she’s hot. You want a girl who has some true values in regarding you and others with equal respect, not a tramp that likes to keep company with brawn but no brains.

She has humility

Humility is one of the most attractive traits a woman can have, and believe it or not it’s why a lot of guys can go after a woman even when she’s not the prettiest fruit on the tree. But it sadly is not the most common trait of today’s women. Instead, so many females have been taught to over-value themselves through narcissistic, self-serving feministic programming, loving-who-you-are quotes, social media, and even by parents who have habits of putting their daughters on special pedestals just because they are their female child. Also, being stuck up, arrogant, or acting like a beautiful bitch are stylized behaviors for women in today’s world, and so many young women sadly put this into practice and ignorantly believe that behaving this way is sexy or appealing or means it matters.

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

The value factor:

Humility creates a truly attractive woman instead, and the reason that it can make a woman so much more beautiful is because physical beauty is already the glory of women. But a woman who is attractive but very humble - and not even necessarily about her looks - is a double knockout. A woman with humility does not see herself as better than anyone else, rather she is kind to everyone until someone gives her a valid reason not to be to them anymore. She regards you not only as a man, but she regards that you have thoughts and feelings like anyone else. She regards that others exist around her in the world and deserve respect just like she wants to be respected. She can listen when people talk and doesn’t think she knows everything, rather she’s always open to learning from others and looks for knowledge. And she isn’t too proud to admit she’s wrong, or too proud to understand where you’re coming from as a man.

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

You want a woman who doesn’t think the world of herself, not a woman who thinks bitchery and snobbery are cool or sexy. And if you’ve ever noticed, these types of women get jealous of humble women very easily. Why? Because they can see the humble woman is much more appealing and gains much more respect and attention from men. So instead of hating, maybe they should simply learn a thing or two.

She can bag her own groceries

I know this one sounds irrelevant and crazy as fuck, but before you piss your pants - cuz I know a lot of people get in their feelings about the topic of bagging their own groceries - there is a catch. I absolutely get it if you don’t have a lot of stuff when you go to check out and you want the cashier to bag your stuff, or even if you’re an elderly person or have some kind of disability, I’m not going to disagree with you for not wanting to bag.

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

I do also know that some cashiers don’t have a problem with it, but it becomes really pigheaded when you as a customer come to check out with a mile-high cart full of groceries and have the snotty, distasteful attitude that “It’s your job” or “That’s what you get paid for, not me,” only wanting to stand there watching the cashier bag it all, and even worse when you’re just standing there on your phone or you know well that the line behind you is already long enough but you feel that you’re too good to put in some effort. As someone who’s worked different jobs as a cashier years ago, I can tell you that most cashiers cannot stand this, even if they keep a smile on their face while doing it.

Please, everybody. Don’t be that guy or girl.

The value factor:

For me it’s great to see anybody, but especially a female helping out with customer service, not because she has to but because she wants to, because she isn’t a Karen and doesn’t see herself too much as a pretty princess who needs her hand held all the time, and because she has some empathy and understanding for someone else’s situation. Sometimes a customer does have to take a little initiative to help things move along for everybody, not just the employee but the other customers behind her as well.

Americans abuse the customer service system like crazy and want people to hold their hand for almost everything where it really isn’t necessary, even if you are a customer. Sometimes helping out does matter. Doing this from time to time is not going to kill you. I personally always bag my own groceries even if I don’t have to and even when I’m well dressed, I prefer to do it because I am able-bodied, do not think too highly of myself, and do not like people doing simple things for me. And also because I have a history of working those kinds of jobs in the past and I know how it is.

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

So to me a woman who knows how to jump in while a cashier is doing his part says to me that she doesn’t consider herself a pretty princess that wants or needs to be pampered all the time but can take action where necessary, and is not as selfish as to just stand there and rudely watch him ring up her $200 food bill. It’s a simple thing but bears importance, because it shows that she knows how to do some thinking and take charge with common sense, and is a good indicator of how she may handle other areas of life.

She doesn’t have “high standards”

Just kidding. Sort of. You definitely do want a woman who has standards and principles, but not all these chicks out here claiming they have such “high standards.” Women with true standards don’t declare it and don’t need to. The ones who do are trying to use it as a requirement that men must first meet in order to be with her, not realizing that having high standards involves a lot more than just what you want a potential partner to meet. True high standards are a principled way of life for a person period, regardless of what guys are out there.

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

A lot of these “high standards” women are the same ones who treat customer service workers like garbage, have college degrees and walk around believing they’re pretty princesses but have nasty habits at home, have girlfriends who they know are messing around on their boyfriends or husbands, can work a career but can’t or don’t cook, and don’t even know some of the basic, common sense things out there that the rest of us do, or just don't do them. They pretend to be clean girls with the guys they want to keep at a distance or keep as backup, but are sexual to the core with other guys they hook up with. They’re a joke.

The value factor:

Women who have true high standards don’t go around announcing it. They live them. And probably have for a long time. Nor do they regard their standards as a gate that men must have a key for if they really want to enter her world. Their standards are simply their way of life, for everyone and everything.

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

You will know what her morals, character, and principles are just by seeing her behavior, interacting with her, and hearing what she has to say. And that’s the kind of woman you really want, not these fake chicks who want to convince you and me that we need to ask how high when she says ‘jump.’

She is clear and consistent (no mixed signals)

A lot of people, both men and women, seem to think that it’s normal for women to be wishy-washy or “give mixed signals,” but I personally don’t believe this is exactly normal. It’s true that women do overthink things 10x more than men, but a woman who sends men one message one moment and then another the next is not very strong on character or courage in my opinion, and most men don’t really want women like that, even if they do think they’re supposed to learn to decipher women’s “mixed signals.” And after all, who really would? No one wants to pursue - or be in an actual relationship - with someone who is on their mind when they go to sleep at night - or lose sleep - wondering if she really likes him, what she really meant when she said this, meant when she did that, or worrying that she’s going to end up being flaky or changing her mind about something tomorrow. This causes men to now start overthinking and feeling frustrated.

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

But believe it or not, there are women out there who are not like that. Are they hard to find? Probably not as much as you think. It’s just that we meet so, so many women who give mixed or unclear messages that it seems impossible to meet ones who are courageous in their communication and decisions with you as a man. And you shouldn’t feel like you have to settle for the ones who aren’t either. In my opinion women who can’t clearly communicate if they like a guy, what they think, be clear about their intentions, change their minds a lot, or change them easily, and overthink everything obviously do not know what they really want and probably don’t even really know themselves as well as they think either.

To me this is a personal development issue they need to work on. So many women come up with so many explanations for why they behave this way, from the classic excuse that it’s in their shy nature, they don’t want to hurt a guy’s feelings, to “society’s expectations” of them as women, and they honestly are just BS to me. Even some female relationship experts - who really only want to teach men what they want them to know or believe about women - try to train men to understand why women aren’t straightforward about things, and this is the worst miseducation they can receive.

The value factor:

Think of it like this, guys: wouldn’t you rather meet a woman who can say to you, “I think I really like you,” or can courageously convey to you, “I admit that I get so nervous when you’re around because I like you a lot”? And wouldn’t you rather deal with a woman who rejects you and honestly communicates “I don’t feel that way about you” or “I don’t want to hurt your feelings but I’m not really interested in that with you,” if you’re asking her out or even suggesting you two hookup?

5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship

Or do you really want to deal with a woman who does goofy things because she’s into you but can’t say it? Or deal with some chick who lies to you for the moment with a smile and says, “Yeah, we could do that!” but doesn’t mean it, changes her mind, and then the next time you two cross paths she doesn’t speak to you and acts like you did something wrong, or ghosts you or blocks your number, leaving you scratching your head? I can appreciate the honest woman who knows what she wants even if it hurts or is disappointing. She’s being true not only to herself but to you as well, because she feels that it’s fair even if you don’t. She doesn’t want to be a liar and give you false hope.

And deep down, I think that’s what a lot of you guys really want too, it’s just that you’re not ready to appreciate it yet, but can if you give yourselves the chance to. You want a woman who is confident and courageous in letting you know she likes you, in what she says, how she behaves, and what she wants, not leaving you to have to figure out anything. Women who give “mixed signals,” or a Yes today and a No tomorrow are weak and cowardly. Don’t try to make something happen with a female who can’t make up her mind.

It's up to you

I can't tell you who to love or choose, but I'm pretty sure most guys want something positive in a woman like what I listed here - and if there's anything you can add, please shout it out. I think as guys it's important to focus a little less on the "hot" or beautiful women, who often don't have great values because they know they're worshipped, and focus a little more on a woman who has quality where it counts.

Namaste, and good luck.


5 Great Ways to Know A Woman Has Good Values and is Special for A Relationship
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19Guy Opinion

Most Helpful Girl

  • Alyssa_11
    This was really informative, especially for a woman like myself.

    I am glad women who speak up for others is considered a good thing lol.
    I am that kind of person and I will speak up for men AND women, friends AND strangers and that's just the kind of person I am.

    I used to stick up for my ex all the time. And once I was a supermarket where a group of teenage boys were bullying a worker because he didn't speak English well. I stood up for him and made them leave.

    After that I felt bad because sometimes I do have some alpha kind of energy and I feel like it comes out in situations like this. But it's good to know it's appreciated.

    Sadly for the no mixed signals/games requirement, I suffer.

    I do recognise that I am not a straightforward person and I genuinely wish from the bottom of my heart I am.

    I am naturally just not an easy going person - I don't take things as they appear surface level and I have always been that way.

    Now, when it comes to love and because I have been hurt before too, I am difficult to break through my walls and get to know.

    But I promise when you do, I am the most loyal, caring and sweet cry baby deep inside lol. Just waiting for the right guy to come and break those walls.. one day.

    Sometimes I think he won't come because every person, including guys, have their own demons and issues to deal with. And maybe I am expecting too much.

    Who knows...
    LikeHelpful 5 People
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Guy

  • spartan55
    Great take dude, and I endorse all of it. I wanted to add a characteristic that I value, which is being able to put their ego aside a apologize when warranted. Self awareness seems to be an afterthought for many women when it comes to how their words and actions affect those around them. Ladies, trust me a guy will notice when you can admit a screw up. We also notice when you don't
    Like 4 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • ManOnFire

      Very good one. Self-awareness is the perfect way to put it.

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • MzAsh
    Good take! I laughed on the groceries point. I imagine you taking your lady through the self checkout thinking “alright now for the test” lol love it.
    LikeFunnyDisagree 6 People
    • ManOnFire

      That would be really funny, yeah.

  • IceEmbers
    I'm late reading this post and I have to say it has inspired me to respond. I currently in a relationship where I feel as I need to draw out the inner strength of my partner. The quietness mention in situations where speaking up is essential has been a long consistent battle that has taken it's toll. I am fighting to be fulfilled with communication and attempting to ask for initiative when it comes to (nearly everything.) Sorry for the vagueness but I am frustrated and internally lashing out within myself.

    I would not suggest at all that I am perfect but I am someone who will openly speak out when someone is knowingly attacking me. Yet, it took me years to develop this tenancy, and it still a working process. Let me get to the point of what I am saying. Seeing these flaws or negative emotions of my partner leaves me in a state of emptiness and longing to be with someone who fulfill those roles you implied as a woman.

    I feel as I need of you too encourage me as selfish as it sounds, that a quiet reserve woman who communication seems vague, empty, and unfulfilling can be satisfying. I don't want to end the relationship with her, yet everything makes me want to walk away because I feel majority of the time, I am dealing with a child with emotional damage.

    I could possibly recreate a war within myself for how angry I consistently am when I asking to be loved as a man, but treated like someone who has a superiority complex. Her main excuse is that she doesn't want to "offend me" or "anger me" but it enrages me when she doesn't take her rightful place in the relationship as my woman. This childish, reserve, not combative or non-defense is not what I find attractive in a woman.

    I am a man of commitment but I will be "damned if I spend the rest of my life "unhappy because you won't grow up." Challenge me with reason. Initiate in our relationship and stop being so timid and weak to express yourself! Gah!

    I know this is selfish, and only one side of the story with limited information but I'm at my boiling point. I'm nearly at a point of giving up but I am not this kind of individual to do so. I want those qualities of a woman to be implemented everyday and it strains me to recieve the opposite. I'm sorry for the long, high pressure text but I just feel like you would be able to help.

    I've calm down a bit, I just need to write this out.
    Like 1 Person
    • ManOnFire

      I understand your frustration entirely. Family situations can also be the same. Maybe I'm wrong but it sounds like she's not fully developed into a courageous woman, and because of that it causes friction.

      A lot of women believe the man should be the only strong one in a relationship and help make up for what she lacks, and this causes more issues than I think most couples really understand.

      I also think I can tell that you've tried talking to her about all this but instead she deflects and might even be telling you that you're the problem?

    • IceEmbers

      It doesn't even remotely enter a realm where she even tries to deflects, it become "OK, I'll do better." Repeats the action nearly five minutes later. Then I am determined as too angry and uncontrolled. No, I have logically processed the amount of disrespect you implement by repeating the same action. I am a very calm individual, but their is a limit to my patience.

      Yes, I constantly am telling her about my feeling because I feel communication is the most honorable thing you can give in a relationship. But if I had a nickel, "here we go with that philosophy, " for everytime I've heard "OK" to my concern, I might shove them up her... Sigh.

      Regardless of what I am trying to say I feel as if she is potentially unable to fulfill her role as a woman. That is a big suggestive sentence and I don't wish to offend women but I need her to be more...

      And yet, I'm here still fighting to siphon any positivity to handle another day of this.
      Thank you for replying to me.

  • jaybee281
    The first one really hits home - Especially when the dude trying to mess with you in front of the girl you like is your best friend - supposedly - who knows that you like the girl - I could only handle it by being a jerk back to him and now we haven't spoken in like a year - fuck that guy
    Like 1 Person
    • ManOnFire

      Yep, I know your experience well.

  • Laura456
    I like this take. Valid points for both genders. I work as a retail assistant as a side job and you would be surprised by the number of people who pass me their bag expecting me to scan then put it into their bags. I just do it. I tell myself I'm doing it as a part of the service, but I would never make anyone else do it for me. It's really not that hard to do it yourself.
    Like 1 Person
    • ManOnFire

      Exactly. "but I would never make anyone else do it for me." I think that's part of my own thinking too when I go shopping. Having worked those kinds of jobs before it feels downright vile and unspeakable to have someone else wipe my ass like that when I can very well do it myself.

    • Laura456

      Yes, because respect goes both ways

  • Diodoro
    I'd agree with all 5 and I'm actually surprised you put Stands up for you first. That's an underrated trait I look for aswell. I only ever had one partner who didn't stand up for me and it killed my attraction for her.

    Didn't even realize it mattered to me until I realized she didn't have it. All previous girls I dates just always had that trait so I expected it. Def importanté
    Like 1 Person
  • ArrowheadSW
    Looks like a good take! I'll finish reading them later.

    One thing I like is a woman who is polite to others in public. One that can understand what employees in stores and restaurants have to go through, and not talk down to them.
    Like 1 Person
  • spuitkaas
    I have a question, what do you think of confidence in women? You say you value humbleness, however I think the value of having standards, standing up for you and being clear and consistent are characteristics you need some sort of self-confidence for.
    So what do you see as being humble? Do you think there's a difference between confident and stuck up and how do you distinguish those? Or would you rather have an insecure girl?
    • ManOnFire

      I laid out what humility is. Confidence is great and definitely necessary, but you don't have to act like a snob or self-assured to have it, which is what a lot of women ignorantly believe is confidence. Confidence is simply being bold and courageous in how you approach and interact with others, like what I noted about a girl standing up for a guy, that requires not only courage but Confidence.

      Confidence is also knowing yourself and your strengths in order to carry yourself comfortably and courageously. Snobbery and stuck up behavior is arrogance and pigheadedness, not confidence.

    • spuitkaas

      Okay that's very clear! Thanks!
      I think sometimes there's an expectation that women should stay low and not be confident and when they do confidently express themselves or are opiniated, they come off as bitchy to people. What do you think?

    • ManOnFire

      It's only bitchy if she's really trying to be in-your-face about it. Otherwise a woman who stays honest and transparent is acceptable for me.

    • Show All
  • Heartache0405
    Unfortunately women of value are dwindling.

    In terms of political value, more women unfortunately vote leftist dem while majority of men vote right wing. Also there’s a study showing that young dems wouldn’t want relationships with their political opponents while republicans couldn’t care less.


    LikeDisagree 4 People
    • ManOnFire

      Well, I think I'm the same. I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with a Republican woman. I hate to say it but I think the Republicans who couldn't care less are probably men who want to have sex with women even if they are democratic.

    • Or you could check out those two links I left and see for yourself... @ManOnFire

    • ManOnFire

      I've read these before, yeah.

  • msc545
    Interesting, but I doubt that it's possible to find a woman who has all this...
    Like 1 Person
    • ManOnFire

      I understand it might seem that way.

    • msc545

      well yes, it is not just that it seems that way - lots of experience suggests it really is. Still, I live in Los Angeles, not exactly the dating mecca of the world. Women here are hell on wheels.

    • ManOnFire

      Lol. They’re horrible here too in the D. C.-Maryland-Virginia area. Very arrogant, very self-absorbed, they all want quality partners but don't want to be one.

    • Show All
  • Shiningtempest
    @ManOnFire What good is dating a woman with good values when there are no shared hobbies, compatible political values, & views on religion?
    Like 1 Person
    • ManOnFire

      That's why you need to find a woman who has both. Just as long as they aren't the mainstream low value chicks out there.

    • @ManOnFire On the contrary, I am willing to date a woman with "low value" if she has shared hobbies, compatible political values, & views on religion.

    • ManOnFire

      Well, if that works for you then keep doing your thing and get that match. I'm sure you can.

  • gamernerd
    100% agree with this, thanks for putting this Take! :)
    Like 1 Person
  • Better_off_here
    this is all great info thanks for sharing it with us :)
    Like 1 Person
  • Subarugirl
    so basically, Integrity, honesty, constancy, humility and a good work ethic?
    • ManOnFire

      Somebody didn't read this whole Take, cuz I didn't say anything about a good work ethic.

    • Subarugirl

      that was just how I interpreted of the part you were talking about bagging groceries, basically don't be lazy and entitled and expect someone else to do something you can do for yourself.

  • TsAubreyKate
    I’d like to add to this um women being fuckable doesn’t make you a baddie I mean Martha Stewart is fuckable
  • Sullivan_Rebecca
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  • ninaneedshelp
    It's really sweet actually. I can agree.
    Like 1 Person
  • Mavie123
    This is beautiful
    Like 1 Person
  • emperor90
    So true
    Like 1 Person
  • Jmmmfi4
    Good take
    Like 1 Person
  • John_Doesnt
    What a myTake for virgins.
  • Show More (7)