When you call someone ugly, do you really mean it? My husband called me ugly?

Anonymous
When my husband and i were having sex, he lost his hardness, and told me im ugly. He said i need to smile. And there was a time i fix myself to look good for church and he told me i look weird, look like im crying, meaning he thinks im ugly but just doesn't use the term ugly. And another time when i posted selfies on facebook and he said im not even as beautiful, just average. Then another time, he said i have an ugly voice. He said he doesn't like it when i wear makeup, only when i go natural, but there was a time he said i look sexy when i wear makeup. He would used to ask me to put on makeup whenever i dont wear makeup. I don't know if he even thinks im attractive or not! I don't know how to look good for him at all... its like i wear makeup, he thinks im ugly, when i dont wear makeup, he thinks im ugly too. This is all killing my securities!
When you call someone ugly, do you really mean it? My husband called me ugly?
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