How do you deal with a cold boyfriend?

[dody_diab]

Sometimes my b.f gets too shy and cold..

I tried so hard to make him talk, but he only talks little :(

sometimes I feel like that I wanna him to show me how much he loves me!, but he don't understand this. I need him to tell me his feelings from time to time. what should I do!

plzzzz help me

[PhatPat]

Oh sweetie :( You poor thing - this totally sucks! And I've been there, I totally understand what you mean!

Okay, well, there ARE those people out there that aren't really that open with their thoughts/feelings and that's okay and understandable. But that doesn't necessarily mean that they are going to connect with someone who is more open and needs to hear those thoughts/feelings on a fairly regular basis.

I think the best thing here is that you need to have a talk with him. Make it VERY casual and be calm about it, but tell him that you feel like you need more warmth from him. That you love him and you show him that you do and you need to see the same from him. Tell him it hurts when you don't get anything from him.

Now if he doesn't want to put the effort in trying to be more open to you, then you have to put some serious thought on whether or not this is the right person for you. It doesn't mean you don't love each other...it just means maybe he can't give you what you need. And you have to be honest with yourself at that point: how long can you go on like this? I know it's harsh and I'm sorry sweetie, but you deserve to be happy. Isn't that what relationships are all about?

Good luck hun! :)

[dody_diab]

But I feel so shy to tell him that his words mean too much to me! =(

i don't know how to make it? =S!

[PhatPat]

Oh sweetie, I understand! But you know what? If you can't talk to him about your feelings, then should you really be in a relationship with him? I'm not trying to be harsh, that's just something you have to ask yourself!

[dody_diab]

I told him everything I feel, but he only said that he don't feel what um talkin' about?.. he thinks that he gives me everything I need from him. he also said that he isa ready to change 4 me, but he doesn't believe that he doesn't give me everything I need! he wants to do this because I asked him for it! how can I make him know that our conversation doesn't have enough emotions?

[Maggalicious]

hm if you try so hard..give it some time...if he can't eventually open up to you then you guys might have a compatibility problem...just throwing it out there.

[QuirkyErratic]

Do you tell/show him you love him from time to time? If you do, try and go over the subject lightly, e.g. 'I know you love me but I wish you'd show your feelings for me more' (I'm not good at coming up with stuff to say XD) so he doesn't get hurt/offended, though if he's a good boyfriend he'll understand. If you don't, then you should show him your feelings towards him in an obvious enough way first (he might be afraid that you don't feel as strongly for him) and see how he responds - after all, good relationships are about balance in terms of getting back what you put in.