Boyfriend prefers curvy girls?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend admitted to me that he prefers thicker girls, you know, the slim thick girl everyone raves about nowadays. i know it seems like a jerk move, but he only admitted because I asked him to. It’s something I’ve picked up on based on pervious crushes and girls he’s dated before me so I stupidly asked him to come out with it and tell me if he prefers them on the curvier side, which he admitted because he knows I hate being lied to. Stupid of me, I know...

anyway, it’s eating out at me now that I know I was right. What’s eating at me the most is that he was getting off to thicker girls, but turning around and telling me I’m absolutely perfect. Maybe it’s because I’m looking at it on a logical stance, but how do you have a preference of thicker girls, but tell me I’m everything you could’ve ever wanted? Tell me I’m perfect and wouldn’t change anything about me, but turn around and get off to girls that are my opposite body type (forgot to mention I’m fairly skinny, but not too skinny.)

either way, it just doesn’t make sense to me. I feel like he settled for a skinny girl because he fell in love with me and had no choice. I feel like I’m not everything he could’ve ever wanted because he prefers them thick, that I’d have to be his preferred body type to actually be the perfect girl for him. It just doesn’t logically make sense to me that I’m perfect to him, but he prefers thicker girls that I don’t look like at all, and wouldn’t change anything about me. Does that make sense?

anyway, I just wanted to share this because I’d like to hear what other people have to say, maybe even change my perspective and make me feel better about this? somehow prove me wrong? He loves me and tells me all the time how sexy and attractive I am, but still can’t help but feel this way. I know it’s a me problem, but this logic can’t help but creep up back into my mind when he tells me I’m everything he could’ve ever wanted and wouldn’t change me. Let me know what you guys think!

[NamerOfStars]

Well, what is it you want from this relationship? Do you require that the person you're with sees you as the most attractive woman in the world? Full bluntness here: that ain't gonna happen. Yes, I can say that without ever having seen you. Even if you are, objectively, the most beautiful woman in the world, a person who spends the majority of his time with you sees everything- sees your tiny imperfections, sees every last flaw and detail. You're not going to be able to compete with an idealized airbrushed woman who's got distance and photoshop making her look perfect.

But sex is only one part of a relationship. Yes, instinct tells you that he might leave you for someone he finds better looking, but look past that. If he's in a relationship with you, then it's because he chose to be (and you did too, of course, but we're focusing on him here). If he's still attracted to you even though you're not his type, then he sees more in you, and you mean all the more to him for it. He wants more than just a sexy body, and it sounds like you're giving him what he wants. He even respects you enough to not lie to you when he knows you hate that. Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good.

[andy530]

Everyone has preferences, preferences in physical features, personality features, interests, goals, values, etc. it’s highly unlikely you will meet someone who checks all those boxes perfectly for you. So what we all do is we find someone who checks the most important ones and have relationships with them. That leaves us to still have other interests and preferences outside of our relationship but that doesn’t mean the partner isn’t the one you want to be with or that you love them any less. I don't know if this makes sense I feel like I’m rambling but this is how I see this issue. It just happens this mismatched preference of his is bumping up against what seems to be an insecurity of yours and that’s where you’re having a hard time...

[lanadelrey25]

Surely there are beautiful, thick, amazing personality women out there he could date. But he chose you. For a reason.

[Jean-Marie_Céline]

You can have a preferred type but still love and be happy with a person who's not that type.
If anything, it means you are very special to make him attracted to you even if you aren't his type.

My fiancée too is not my type physically, but that just means she's very special to me to make me feel attracted to her.

[OlderAndWiser]

EVERYONE does not rave about slightly obese females.

[triff]

I would never have said this to you I think it's quite hurtful Certainly, insensitive The answer I would have said ( which stands as the truth for any guy) would be None of my Xs are not the same They are all individual personalities which was how I was attracted Here now you win hands down your in my heart and head

[AaronKrieger]

I prefer slightly chubby girls, yet my last ex was REALLY skinny and I wouldn't had changed her. I found her appearance attractive and her personality as well, so her being skinny didn't bother me. A girl doesn't have to be the exact body type I usually find ideal for me to find her insanely attractive and perfect even. I've found finding a girl's personality attractive makes her appearance way more attractive to me.

[mike5150]

He loves you. It is is possible to have an attraction to a certain sort of person but fall in love with someone who doesn't fit that category.

[Iron_Man]

Either move on or start working out with weights and eat a lot of food but don’t get fat

[Siavash_1990]

He chose you. He must have had a reason, i would think.

[reptocarl2]

Looks aren’t everything

[Twalli]

Why do you care if he's in love with you?