Anyone expecting an exterior existence to make them happy (be it a partner, or a substance like drigs/alcohol, or social media, or pretty much anything) will never be happy. Expectations can and should only be directed at ourselves, and indeed only we can make ourselves happy. Expecting your partner in particular to make you happy necessarily leads to bitter disapointments, conflicts, even loss. I'm not saying you shouldn't experience joy and such positive emotion because of your partner's deeds, behaviour and plain existence in your life (in fact, if you don't - they might very much not be the right partner for you, or you might have a serious emotional problem), but the moment you EXPECT them to make you happy - it becomes their "job" and your unhappiness becomes their failure, which is a very unhealthy and even toxic situation. You should be able to rely on uourself alone for basic social and emotional survival, other people and things in life are nothing but aids (perhaps important and meaningful aids, but still nothing more than aids).
I think in any relationship your partner could have the jesters and their best friend and like to do fun things but you're the only person that can make yourself happy nobody else can do it and it's not their job to to make you happy they can't do that we can do nice things but happiness comes from within I mean I'm single and I wish I wasn't but I'm single and I'm happy I'm not happy that I'm single but I'm the only one that can make me happy. I learned a long time ago that we are all given a choice and that choice is become who we want to become by the things we say and do so make the right choices make yourself happy everyday there's no reason to be angry and pissed off at the world if you have happiness Within that means you're giving happiness to somebody else by showing them how they could be happy
Yes, of course. If someone is constantly unhappy with their partner, it's probably not a good relationship. On the other hand though, I think a lot of people expect to be happy *all of the time* and that's simply not realistic. There will be times when you may argue or have disagreements with your partner, which is 100% normal since we are still individual people with our own opinions on things. It's important to understand that real relationships involve both moments of happiness as well as moments of adversity and difficulties. If it's the right person, they will work with you to minimize the difficult moments and communicate appropriately when there is an issue. The important thing is to recognize what your limits are for the "unhappiness" and what someone is willing to sacrifice when in a relationship.
Nobody can really make you happy except for you if your partner makes you happy then he makes you happy but really and truly if something goes wrong that he did by mistake and now you're upset. It's really not his quote unquote job to make you happy I don't really expect my partner to make me happy I expect them to communicate with me or something is wrong with him or just have fun and do things together he can make me happy yes but I don't "expect" him to make me happy I can make myself happy you shouldn't really expecting anything from anyone cuz it might not turn out the way you plan.
Opinion
46Opinion
No partners are there to make life more enjoyable but they aren't personally responsible for your emotions.
Happy in life no... Happy, scratch that.. content in the relationship is something both partners should strive for work together towards in a healthy relationship.
I can't believe so many people said yes. It is not your partners job to make you happy.. If you're not already happy, your partner has no hope of making you happy.
My wife is the spice of my life, but when i met her i was not in a good place in my life, Meeting her, i decided to make changes for the better, become a better, happier person, Having her with me was the icing on the cake, making the happy way better.
Listen well, You are responsible for your own happiness, your own emotional state, not your partner, and no one else, only you.
So here's the think... no one can MAKE you ANYTHING. Unless you're saying you've given over power over yourself to someone or to others. YOU get to choose, you determine how you feel about things, your level of joy or regret, sorrow or glee.
Mostly these responses are a replication of something you responded to in puberty - and your brain dredges those feelings up again in response to new stimulus. Your brain doesn't just manufacture feelings.
A successful relationship relies on both parties to be 'happy'. To be contented, committed, upbeat. No one likes debbie-downers.
And then there's the old adage, "Fake it 'till you make it." How you think and feel directly affects your mood. You can choose to see the glass half empty or half full. It's all up to you.
Great question!
The answer for me is No. I do not expect my girlfriend/fiancee/wife to personally make me happy. What I mean by that is I'm not expecting her to have to put forth effort specifically to put a smile on my face and/or put me in a good mood. That's not her job. My own emotional health is my responsibility, and must be maintained and regulated internally. (However, if she does things with the intent of making me happy, then that will certainly be welcome and appreciated. And I intend to do the same for her.)
HOWEVER,... she WILL make me happy -- generally speaking -- simply because of the fact that she is with me and she is "mine.". (Please don't be triggered by the possessive phrase. It's just an expression.). I will be happy just due [to the general concept of] having her in my life.
If you consacrate your life to one person, that one should make you feel at ease when you're together.
I believe it's pretty obvious. If that isn't the case, either you got the wrong person, or you're the wrong person for the relationship. Try seeing if things can be fixed from either side, or just break up and look for a better candidate.
I can say that people put their happiness in someone else's but it rarely works that way. If you turn that kind of control over to someone else, you'll often be miserable in life.
You need to be able to be happy yourself, and then when your together with someone you can still be happy. Don't ever give that kind of power for some else to wield.
Yes and no.
No one will make you happy 24/7.
Having a partner should make most experiences in your life better, not worse.
Sharing my hobbies with an SO would make me happy most if the time, and the times that sucked I would usually still be content just knowing I had that.
I just expect my partner to be themselves. Because if I'm in a relationship with them 9 times out of 10 it's because I like who they are and enjoy being around them and with them. And that does make me happy.
But I think it's important that both people in a relationship both make an effort to make sure their partner is happy within the realm of what's appropriate and not outrageous and to communicate with each other.
No. They add to my happiness but I don't expect them to make me happy all the time. That expectation is pretty high.
Most people think they will happy because of their partners, but if they're already miserable with themselves it's hard to be happy from one day to the other just because they have a partner.
A partner has an important influence, yes, but that person is not fully responsible for his/her partner's happiness. So my answer is not, I do not expect it.
No , my ex wife did the polar opposite , & why I avoid even the thought of " dating " , far prefer my own company . The only person you can rely on for happiness or anything else , is yourself , more so if you are male. What a stark difference in gender response.
No, I believe happiness should come within for the most part. Someone can't rely on another to make them happy. I do believe that a partner should be able to help the one their with, with happiness if it's been a tough day, and become a supportive shoulder, but no way should someone expect someone to make them happy.
yes, not in the sense that they need to make me overall happier than when being single, but sure they should bring more happiness into my life than distress since I do have to give up some personal freedom and use some energy to be there for my partner.
I want to do things to make my partner happy as well, I expect a partnership where we share an everyday life with its ups and downs and help each other out.
Expecting your partner to make you happy is a good recipe to a toxic relationship. You shouldn't expect someone else to make you happy. Its not their responsibility to make you happy. You should be happy being yourself before dating anyone. Expecting someone else to make you happy is... well... selfish.
No my girlfriend is not responsible for my happiness. I am responsible for that. If she gets in the way of that I must reassess the relationship. Although having a loving girlfriend that looks up to me does contribute to my feeling happy, my happiness does not depend on her.
No. Mistake number one in any relationship as a human is to believe someone else can give you or provide you with happiness. Happiness isn't material you can buy at the store. If it were true billionaires wouldn't be getting divorced aka. Jeff Bezos Amazon owner. Happiness is innner peace you can and must find within. Not without.
I always though that it was a two way thing in marriages, each giving and receiving,
It's my own job to be happy. Of course my girl should only enhance my overall happiness, but my base happiness is my own responsibility, and that's true of everyone.
Yes, I mean, if we are together, that means we love (or at least like) each other. When you like/love someone, you want that someone to be happy with you, right?
Good Lord, no! I just don't expect her to go out of her way to make me miserable. My own happiness must well up from within.
These answers explain why women have perpetual “grass is greener” syndrome and are ALWAYS modifying their love and interest to suit how their needs are being met. Why most divorces are started by women and why women’s happiness has been on the decline exponentially for the last 60 years.
Wow, 63% Yes.. Really?
Thats extremely unhealthy, the only person who can make you happy is you, its a choice that you make.
No I don’t believe my partner will make me solely happy, but I do believe two people can create happiness together. By being happy for each other’s achievements and doing what they love in life. That kinda happiness tends creates a strong bond
Not in any intentional way.
Being with someone serious, who thinks in a similar manner/to the same level of sincerity and genuiness, would/does on its own.
Physically similar traits help us relate.
well , we're partners , if i get sad he gotta try to make me happy and when he's sad imma try mah best for him to have a smile
Awww. That's good! You're a sweet person.
@Jamie05rhs :)
I think some do. It's foolish to outsource responsibility for your own happiness, and wholey unfair on the partner.
Isn’t that what’s supposed to happen when two variables pair themselves.
“Do you have what it takes to impress me?”
”Double Kill... I’m beginning to enjoy this”
”SKssiwdndkdowuuucnflu msksidnd. @$”#d, dem H I K E”
No, my partner is not responsible for my happiness however they shouldn't detract from it or try to get in the way of it either.
IMHO, your partner is there to support and aid you in your pursuit of happiness as you are the same for them. The goal is also to find things that make both happy to share together throughout life together.
I expect to be happy with my partner. They don't necessarily have to actively make me happy... but if I'm happy with her then chances are I'm overall more happy.
I expect to enjoy being with her.
But I don't expect her to to fix me or fill some hole in my life.
If you're generally biter or depressed, a partner isn't going to change that.
My happiness comes from within. Every women has me unhappy. Loving makes me happy though. But it isn't the women that makes man happy. It is loving her that makes one happy and unhappy in the end :)
Maybe your partner has to provide an environment that you can be happy in.
No? Like I want them to make me 'happier'? Yes? If I'm unhappy before dating, I don't think I'm ready yet to date in the first place
Simply being able to talk with her everyday and be a part of her world made me happy. It just didn't last.
My husband TRIES to make me happy, but happiness is up to me.
I don't expect her to have to so things to make me happy, but I will leave if I can't be happy with her
To be my only source of happiness no. To help me be happy yes
If its the right person they can bring the best out of you !! And when someone is able to bring the best out your personality you feel happier😝
I expect her to help not make it worse. My happiness is my own to deal with.
I expect it to work both ways.. if you don't make each other happy then what's the point
Yes! And I make her happy! Win win! Isn't that a huge part of it?
Sure , I want to marry someone that beats me and poisons me.
Lol.
@Jamie05rhs I think maybe me and Aimee_ on here should marry , she has PR fire of desire going , but she could also kick my ass because she is only 22 .
@888theGreat I don't think I know her.
What does "PR" stand for? (Assuming it isn't Puerto Rico?)
@Jamie05rhs yes it means that
Oh, okay. Cool.
No. I don't put that ridiculous responsibility on someone else.
Isn't it obvious?
Why does people get into relationship at the first place?
I know what makes me happy. They can cooperate a little time to time.
No, I’m already happy.
Expect? No, but one can hope.
I mean they shouldn't make me sad
True!
Though there are a lot of emotions that people will experience when in a relationship. And some of them aren't even the fault of their partner. It's just feelings.
As much as I make them, yes.
Yes She needs to help me
I expect my partner to be happy with me.
It should come with the packaging, shouldn't it?
To some degree by being loyal and judgmental.
I meant unjudgmental
the flip side is miserable.
Make each other happy
Yes. As much as I'll make her happy
Nope.. Why would I?
No I don't.
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