If you are in serious relationship with your girlfriend/boyfriend, do you care about his/her past?

Question

For example his/her sexual history, sexual Body count and their girlfriends/boyfriends

This_Is_My_Opinion8 · Accepted Answer

If they were in jail, were drug addicts, were part of a cult, if they cheated before, etc. That I care. With their body count I couldn't give less of a shit.

ChrisMaster69 · Accepted Answer

Nope not in the slightest and hopefully they think the same

caring__1 · Answer

Details are irrelevant, but you do want to know what each of you have learned from your past experiences and what changes have been made, as a result of that acquired knowledge. What they've done and who they've done it with only leads to comparisons, and that prevents us from living in the moment. Patterns are important to know, such as how the person tends to deal with stress or disappointment or rejection. Just because they did something in the past doesn't mean they will always do it the same way, but the longer patterns exist, the less likely they'll change. Don't just trust their word, as people want you to see them as they want to be seen, not necessarily as they are... ask their friends and family for those patterns, also.

As far as sexual history goes, it isn't uncommon for people to go through an exploration and discovery phase when they are young... so they can discover what works or doesn't work for them. Don't judge them on that. You want to be safe, though, so make sure both of you are tested for STIs, though not all can be accurately tested for (ie herpes). You are not only having sex with your partner, but all your partner's previous partners and all their previous partners. It's not about the numbers, as you have no control of that, but about protecting yourself. Be responsible, but taking things to extremes will destroy your relationships.

MTC29 · Answer

"For example his/her sexual history, sexual Body count and their girlfriends/boyfriends."

None of that interests me in the slightest.

In point of fact, there won't be many women in my age range who are virgins, so prior sexual history is taken for granted.

I never knew about the body count concept until I joined this site. I never kept tack, but I'm sure I hit triple digits some time ago.

Pervious boyfriends, partners, FWBs, SO's... what ever you want to call them- I don't care. The only concern are ex-husbands, who have an annoying tendency to resurface.

Ghostlock · Answer

No... why should I care what she has done in her past. It's not a competition. I can't stand when a woman inquires about my past, I have no reason to inquire about hers... or even care. It is not what she has done with them that I care about, it's what she does with me. I don't care how big her exes were, I don't want to hear about how small they were either (women love telling you how small their exes were... like that is supposed to make me feel better than them or something? If they were so small then why did you stay with them?) and I don't care what sexual acts they have done with you either. I didn't ask, I won't ask and I appreciate if a woman didn't ask me.

What I do want to hear though is what you would like to do to me... tell me what you are going to do to me all day long... let's leave our exes out of our relationship, shall we? :)

llcanon · Answer

it depends= but i will say this. i ask if she ever cheated on husband or boyfriend, if she says yes, I most likely will not see her again. I also ask her if she was ever in prison-most likely won't see her again. i ask her if she ever lived a cuckold lifestyle- if she is honest and says yes- i run like hell. I don't need that kind of a woman. if she says she has slept with a lot of men- i don't continue seeing her-risk of STD is very high as many of those kind of sexual diseases can lay dormant and show up later in her life- too much of a risk. Just being honest

DizzyDesii · Answer

Yes body count matters as well as if the person they got sexual with was the same or opposite gender and if they were dating the person. I dont want someone who gives themselves up so easily. Hopefully they only had sex while in a serious relationship. I also dont want someone who experimented with the same sex because I would find that to be gay and i only want a straight man

Anonymous · Answer

Yes past matters highly , I am not promiscuous and I don’t want any. Some past relationships can be fine but not one night stands , multiple partners or too much body count. No only fans , previous nude shoot , any kind of sex service , selling sexual pics online or social media account full of half naked photos. If she has a problem with that better date guys who don’t have problems with them.

Miristheiss · Answer

When I was dating yes... I would have ended things if we weren't compatible.
I wouldn't have stayed with her if she had had one night stands, if she slept around, if she had ever been willing to have a threesome, if she'd ever done sex work of any kind... any stripping, nude online stuff, nude photos.

Anyone who did these things was a permanent, life long "NO" for dating and marriage for me.

Lliam · Answer

Not at all. I like a woman who loves sex with men and courageously lived life to the fullest, maybe made some mistakes and learned lessons. None of my girlfriends were virgins.
Although, there are some past lifestyle choices that would probably turn me away. I don't think I could deal with someone who had been a prostitute or had a long history of one night stands or sex in public bathrooms with strangers. That would indicate bad character.

Peterness · Answer

I certainly care. I think everything about my partner is important. I don't think it would be a relationship killer unless it was something extreme. For example, if she has had hundreds of lovers and loves her weekly gang-bang.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Absolutely. Because a person's sexuality is a life journey. And "cookies" are stored, which can't be erased. Also, there are "programs" left over from earlier activities, which still run in the background. There is no such thing as a factory reset. Your past affects the future, whether you like it or not.

oldawg · Answer

No not really as long as she's being honest and open and doesn't keep any secrets. If she's not being honest with me and she's hiding something that really pisses me off but then if she's honest about her past then no it doesn't bother me

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Not really. I care about why the relationships ended, but nothing more.

DarkWinterNights · Answer

Yes. It’s a good indicator of their emotional stability. I don’t have a high body count. I expect the same for potential partners.

KinxWorld93 · Answer

I don't think so. Unless it was something serious like they committed a heinous crime (rape, murder, domestic violence) or they did really hard core drugs in the past (and even that's a bit of a slippery slope) then their past should be irrelevant to you.

SLRK3 · Answer

Their past is who made them who they are today and I love them for who they are! Their past means nothing.

AngelMegumin · Answer

Ofc, thr amount of person's experience is vital to know in order to make healthy relationships.

vincentisme22 · Answer

If they were whorey in the past I would like to know because it could change how much I trust their loyalty. Plus I don't want a STD. Thing is, I would probably get these questions answered before I'm in a relationship with 'em.

Yourfriend2021 · Answer

If they have a high body count it means they aren't good at long term relationships, either they don't want one or there is some other problem like cheating. So yes it tells me something.

Hadyyy · Answer

I would actually. not ashamed of the truth.  But if we we're serious, then trust and honesty would win over both of our pasts

PeacefulRainDrop · Answer

No its called a past for a reason.. I am a pretty good judge of character

maggie_c · Answer

god! can I confess? I was jealous of my partners and their exes. I checked their social media pages..

jeffryrobertbabb · Answer

We have never discussed it, I'd rather not know about it.

Ironic_Method · Answer

Yes. I care about history as we are all the sums of our decisions.

SenseiSeptred · Answer

Yes, because we should be able to have an open discussion about that type of thing.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, if he has had a lot of sex he probably is just a sex monster.

Being_a_good_Indian · Answer

I do and I have right to know.

888theGreat · Answer

yep, and that would happen before anything was serious

Zygum · Answer

Yes, I will check her past, may she is habitual of Cheating and bluffing

Sampan2017 · Answer

No don't care about past

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Hell yeah. Ill date anyone but her past is what makes her unmarrigable.

Anonymous · Answer

Nothing should be exposed to me unless they feel it should be. It I ask questions I hope he loves me enough to be honest, but everything is up to when your partner is ready to talk about it with you.

es20490446e · Answer

I care about her current attitude.

Agape93 · Answer

Depends

karaspara · Answer

Not bodycount exes etc

EssenceOfLight · Answer

Yes. The past predicts too often the future.

dudeinohio · Answer

No really don't care

Kelly6 · Answer

Nope

If you are in serious relationship with your girlfriend/boyfriend, do you care about his/her past?

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