Grandmother is dying, I may be alone for life, and other burdens. How do I cope?

[Inthecraphole]

I turned 27 recently this month. I am up here in New York visiting my grandmother and saying goodbye. She is being moved into hospice care.

Meanwhile, I am also struggling with the fact I could be single the rest of my life too. That has been bothering me for a very long time. I seek a woman who has never formed romantic bonds with another guy before, especially from her youth. I only want me and a woman to be each other's first loves. I can no longer say me and a woman met when we were young and kids. I envy people who meet the loves of their lives in college or earlier. They can at least know they spent their youths with each other. I cannot say that.

Also, I feel very alone. I hardly have a social life. I missed out on a lot during my youth.

My dog may be having to be put down soon.

There is not many things I feel are going well right now. I am fortunate and grateful to have such great parents and a job. That's about it. I also still live at home as of now.

Below is me:

This is me

[Jamie05rhs]

Hey, man. Sorry about your grandma (and your dog.). I understand this is a rough year for you, and I feel for you. Try to keep your chin up, man. I believe good things are in store for you still.

[Inthecraphole]

Thank you

[Jamie05rhs]

You're welcome, man.

[Jamie05rhs]

Thanks for the MHO, man.

[Anonymous]

Sorry about your gma and your dog… and I’ve seen you post a lot about wanting a girl with no past, you’re just making things way too difficult for you. Maybe you can try those foreign dating sites they’re usually very eager to marry young lol

[ChiPaPa]

Look, you're going to have to accept the possibility of not being a girl's first love. You're getting to hung up on something that doesn't matter. Especially, if you're concerned about being forever alone.

[Inthecraphole]

It matters. I am older and a true adult now. I cannot say me and a woman knew each other when we were both young.
I cannot get over the relationships and bonds she has formed with other guys from her youth. I missed those days. I cannot go back.
Plus, I don't want to give my heart to a woman the very first time when she had romantic baggage and a romantic past herself.

[Inthecraphole]

... and I almost had a girl like that, but she saw I wasn't her type. My height was a factor among some other things.

[Renegade_Sailor]

Get your ass to the gym, get motivated, start putting a dent in the world.

Put down the video games and porn, start chasing real achievements.

Also check out The Rational Male and Aaron Clarey on YouTube

[Anonymous]

Your focus determines your reality, you are dwelling on the negative.

You also have wildly unrealistic expectations for dating, why make things harder than they already are by making up ridiculous rules?

[Anonymous]

I agree with the other Anon. With that high standard, you will be alone. You can try for mail order foreign brides. They love white western men

[moviedude714]

This question reminds me how my perspective towards the world has changed

[noohair]

Sounds like you have the makings of a country song.