@LoneWolf21 said most of what I was going to say. Yes, it's possible. No, it won't be easy. You don't have the luxury of time to be passive either - you're going to have to take an ACTIVE role in the process if you hope to have children - you can't just wait for men to come to you.
As others have said, everyone will have more baggage, so expect that. You have much less baggage than most women your age, so that's a strong point in your favor, but you still have more than many girls in their 20s who are your competition. That means you need to have realistic standards for men. You are also going to have to make a choice between children and a restaurant, at least until they are in school full time, because a restaurant is an 80 hour a week job for an owner, and you can't raise children that way.
I strongly advise avoiding dating apps and social media for dating. That's fine for hookups, but you won't find a husband that way. You need to date locally, meet men IN PERSON, and you need to date with intention, because the clock is ticking. You will meet otherwise great men who don't want marriage or children, and you have to eliminate them quickly and move on, no matter how much you like them. It's going to be a challenge, and you have to stay focused on the goal, which is finding a good, moral man who has the same life goals as you. If you focus on his looks or career too much, you will get strung along and will run out of time.
You can achieve this if you work for it and focus on what really matters, but it's going to be a battle, and you won't get everything you want. Make sure you get what matters, and remember that his wants and desires matter too.
Is it possible? Yes. It's not going to be easy for you though. The sorry state of dating and relationships right now is going to be a big hindrance to you. Just be aware of that. I wouldn't recommend online dating in general, but especially stay away from Tinder. Tinder is basically just a cesspool for the most part. Make sure you keep your guard up though. A relatively good portion of guys will just want s*x from you. So be on the lookout for that.
You do have two very substantial benefits in your corner though. You don't have any children yet, and you haven't slept around.
True indeed on your last sentence. I've only slept with one man in my man; I gave it away to him long ago and drained my youthful years. I was naive to believe his words of getting married to him and having kids. He took advantage of my sweet nature, my innocence.
I don't mean to pry, but you said you were, "naive to believe his words of getting married to him and having kids." Did he end up not asking you to marry him?
He would continue saying he would want to marry but then kept putting excuses. He kept demanding me to cook more elaborated dishes, that he wasn't seeing more progress in my food business and kept demanding more (even grading every single pictures of food I would send on messenger)... made me do things so then he would decide if I was ready or not.
It was nearly impossible to reach the goal; he would continue increasing more demands and putting more excuses not to marry me.
the last phrase he told me two days ago that really hurt me soo much that I realized he was never going to marry me was:
''You're not ready for it''. That killed me so badly. I felt as if it was the ultimate rejection after so many years wasted.
Yeah, I'm sorry you had to go through that. Sounds like you bent yourself backwards trying to please and prove yourself to him. Meanwhile he was just playing games and using you. Unfortunately a lot of people are like that in s*x and relationships. At least you know some of the warning signs of this kind of behavior moving forward.
Don't let his behavior and this negative experience ruin your self respect and self worth. You deserve more than that immature bs.
There are a couple things that's keeping me from what ending up giving up on humanity, distrust towards men, being forever traumatized or on even depressive pills:
- My online bakery and food business and my desire to turning it into my restaurant
- My current Judo classes (it does gets rid of some stress and makes me feel relax)
- My supportive grandma, my parents and the psychologist (I went to seek a psychologist today and she adviced to dump and block this user from all contacts, which I did)
Yes it did caused an impact in my life but with those things mentioned, it was slightly less dramatic then it would've been.
When I feel like crying, as soon as I get reminded of my growing business or Judo classes... I become strong again. I have to even though I'm still hurting badly. Thank you for your kind words.
It's great that you have your family, business, and hobbies to help keep you grounded. The therapist is also a big help to. I can understand and sympathize with the distrust and trauma of it all. Unfortunately it seems most people don't really take s*x and relationships seriously anymore. Irregardless of their gender. It can really take a toll on you.
Hope and pray you can heal from this whole ordeal and move on to find a man that won't play games with you, and be a loving and devoted husband to you.
That guy was lying to you the whole time. He NEVER intended to marry you, from the very beginning. I hope you realize that.
And that was just disgusting and evil what he did to you. The manipulation and gaslighting. I hope he dies a very painful death.
@Jamie05rhs
I had to go to a psychologist. The lady told me that I was his puppet the whole time. He lied to and used me. Even more insult... he still owes me $1,300. He never paid my money back either.
What a douche!!!
Omg you sound like your in a very similar situation to me. I have spent nine years in a toxic relationship and I’m 34 next year,
I really want to have children and find pure love. I do believe it is out there for us. We deserve happiness and a good partner and to be able have our needs met! Good luck to you, I’m sure there is a nice man out there! If you need to talk email me as I know how you are feeling. Love to you xo
I read your story in the comments. It is very similar to mine. So if you ever needed a friend know you can always DM me. You are a beautiful woman and your past trauma does not dictate your future. You are now lost and depressed and that's okay. Just be kind to yourself ❤️
Opinion
45Opinion
Its not impossible... its just harder.
In my 20s it was easy because I was nieve. In my 30s and 40s I just know better and so do the single ladies I meet that are in my age group.
We just pick on thing and see signs that we have experience with... and then we over think it, or cut and run from it.
Welcome to the club. Just got out a couple of months ago. It's a bit hard but I am not looking for one right now. Also, I don't go out due to covid thing, so it'll be hard for me to meet someone new. But yes, it's possible. We need to work on ourselves first. Fix what is broken, improve what is already good and we should be back to the dating game in no time.
It sure is, it is possible at any age to find love.
You might want to try some of the better online dating sites where you have to pay to join, It's just lunch, e-harmony etc.
That tends to eliminate most of those just looking for a hook up for the night. I live in a small town so there were not a lot of options available for dating locally.
So going on line opened up a lot of choices to me.
I wasn't big on going to bars etc.
Of course it is. There are lots of men out there in your age group who are looking for the right woman to settle down with.
This is not a specific advertisement for one... get on one of the better dating sites. I know several people who met and married on there.
I'm 29. Single for 5 years never been married and can't find anyone to talk to or even try to build a relationship with so I understand where you're coming from and the uncertainty. I mean you're beautiful so you shouldn't have any problem but I'm a guy so it's probably going to be a little more difficult. Hopefully this vaccine bullshit don't wipe out half of our age group
That’s the best thing that could happen to the world… good bye stupid young people lmao… but in all actuality that really might be a good thing. Terrible shame and waste of life but our generation have no sense of accountability.
Freaking liberal ideology and social justice warriors.
Hope your not talking about me… it’s because of the liberals and feminists I think a few generations of suffering will do this country and it’s people some good.
Americans have had it easy for too long. Maybe if they come to understand what they stand to lose they will appreciate it more. If not i completely support the eradication of an entire generation -.-
Not like I have anyone of this generation I care about besides myself.
you hit the wall. forget it. you have been replaced by the thousands of fresh young sluts who will make exactly the same mistakes that you all other used up hags made. It's not that you cannot find somebody. Never underestimate a woman's millions of options. It's just that you will never be happy with the options you have. Women want it all.
I was an innocent girl at the time. I bumped into a manipulative, smooth-talking, prolific user. He also owes me money, it's $1,300. I never got my money back.
I didn't know. I really thought he would marry me. He purposely kept me to waste my years. I hate him. I hate him.
if you really are such a tradthot who wants marriage then you would let your father, brother, community or church make this decision in your stead. Women have the dumbest instincts and all you end up doing is whoring yourselves out and then play the victim to gain a position power. The guy who played you is a king.
It's ALWAYS possible. Problem is as we age we gain baggage. When we're young we're all relatively in the same boat. Same education, same life experience etc.
You being childless is actually a plus. Kids are the ultimate baggage lol. I'm not saying kids are bad. But kids ALWAYS come first and they should. But that can be a problem when 2 people are trying to get to know each other.
u Yes, it very much is. I have known people who have gotten married in their mid and late 30s.
Ofcourse it is. For women if they dont have kids it’s very easy to land a man. The biggest problem single girls have is their kids because the man always assumes responsibility even if the kids aren't his because that is the role of the male to be a strong provider
Possible yes. Probable no. Your 30+ and datings shit right now. Even if you do well I can get sex from other sources for free so the basic point of looking for a partners lost.
yeah I'm trying an international dating site (I've paid for it just now) and got some replies. One of them was a 50 year-old man already asking if I wanted to see his penis. I'm recovering for a bad experience where I was lied to and manipulated for years... he never wanted to marry me and he wasted my years... he took my innocence too. I was a virgin when I met him and much younger.
that's not true.
Anyways girl you stay away from international dating apps they're full of scammers and ambitious people who'd do anything just to get visa. Don't let your emotions and frustration make you stupid. I understand where are you coming from but acting based on desperation never gives good results especially for women. Lower your standards or upgrade your interests and looks and get with someone local. You are already beautiful so stop this thinking. Love can be found at any age I know women older than you and with kids who found love. Plus online opinions are not to be taking as facts. You are not worthless just because you are 30 what a load of crap
I never said she was worthless… I just said she was worth less… her times come and gone. There’s younger hotter models out there for the men still dating so why would they choose her?
To be fair I also never said the odds were 0 either. But no matter how you look at it… your gonna have to give up a lot to be with someone. Just as men have been lied to thinking being king and working hard was enough women also are being lied to thinking their suitors will always want them. Unfortunately there’s not always tomorrow.
Although I’m being very unfair. Maybe your beautiful and amazing and kind and honest and loyal and perfect in every way… but I don’t know you enough to trust you when you brag about how wonderful you say you are… thus the rub. If you can’t show off your personality how do you attract guys without looking good and offering better then the rest?
I dont understand the last paragraph and to whom it was directed. Plus you mentioned a lot of possibilities which is what life about. So I'm not going to argue every possibility because that's endless. Finally don't act like hot young girls are stacking up at your door or every guys door. Just go around G@G and see how young men also are struggling. Studies actually shows that young men today reported having way less sex than two or three generations before them. So no the market is tough on everyone. And sometimes try to be kind. It doesn't really hurt. Love is luck. Some are lucky to find it and some are not. So just be kind. When a man is short or doesn't have money or ugly you don't see me running around telling him he's worth less. Because that makes no sense. Easy to put others down. But that's all that it is.
Sry I thought that was an obvious change in who I was talking to my bad. I was talking to Asker.
Do you think having money as a man helps or hurts or don’t even effect your chances? How about looks on a woman. Don’t pretend men don’t want something nice to look at. Take it from someone who’s not a looker if you lack any physical attraction you’re screwed.
And your right I don’t have lines of women and don’t want them… I’m not… sexual. I get all the sex I need from 2 friends when we’re in the mood. I only need sex once every couple of week or so to keep my spirits up I don’t really enjoy myself with that kinda thing so idc if it dries up completely. What really sucks is knowing how alone you’ll be until the day you die… that’s the hard one to get over. I suggest Asker find a hobby, friends, or a sister or something and just get used to it…
Maybe I’ll say it in a less condescending way to make you happy. Both Asker and I and billions (yes that numbers correct) will die alone without ever finding someone that loves us or even cares about us. Welcome to the real world honey unfortunately it’s not the fairy tail you’ve been raised believing it is.
well your last response was realistic and respectful so I'd respect that. I don't think I want to debate as we're both entitled for our opinions. we can agree to disagree. Have a good day 🌹
Not really. People are dating in real their 60s and 70s. Women are having babies in their 40's and relationships are not even about sex that's just a bonus that comes with the territory. I think people who are single their whole lives are single by choice, not because it's forced on them. People have these high standards for a mate. Everyone is very spoiled and entitled these days. The reason it wasn't a problem in the past is because people had realistic expectations. That's why I think I still have a good chance, my standards aren't through the roof on beauty and Idc her income level.
But that has no consideration towards HER standards. It’s never been an issue of men’s standards and many men would take the first bi-pedal vag that would have them lol. It’s always been women’s choice and they don’t choose you.
well… it wasn’t until years later I realized how many advances women made on me in high school LMAO. Unfortunately I was extremely dense so yeah in a way I have. But since I left school and society behind not many advances to reject truth be told.
Yes it is possible. You're attractive and it looks like you take care of yourself. People find love at different ages. There are even people older than you are who have found love
Yes. I found love in my late 30s/early 40s. It's obviously more ideal if you can find it earlier, but that didn't happen to you it's very possible to still find it latter on.
I hope you. I thought what I had was love but it wasn't. This guy had deceived me for years and doesn't even pay my money back. He owes me $1,300.
Of course! At any age. Just remember that we like the same things that you like in guys. Positivity, confidence etc.
Your an old guy who's on a website who texts over a 1000 girls about putting your dick up their ass.
What louser...
People meet and fall in love in elderly homes. There is no age limit on love.
Of course, love isn't age definitive.
People of all ages find love out there.
It's possible. But the state of the 'fast food' dating market today isn't going to make it easy. Good luck.
I know it won't be easy but I guess getting away from a dead-end situation is better than if I had continue staying it in and wasted more years. By then, my fertility window would've been closed completely.
Honey good thing you got rid of him. He was blocking your blessings. Work on yourself love yourself, enjoy being single and you will meet a lovely guy who will treat you right.
What do you think? I don't know why you asked this... Ofcourse it is, and you know that duh.. if it's possible to find love at 80, why not 30? Anythings possible... I think you just asked this question to sort of advertise that your single and looking and try and get some of the men on this website to hit you up... Wrong site Hun... This isn't a dating website, so kindly fuck off
I'm sure it's possible. I believe you can find love. 💜
I'm not sure I should have hit the yes choice, but I'm going for the optimistic outlook for you. Hopefully you will
Yes, you are very pretty and should be able to find love and get married , have kids
Love is not restricted with age, you can get love even at 60
Anything is possible & love can kick you in the ass when you least expect it.
Sure, I fell in love a few times in my late 30's after my marriage ended.
Absolutely, especially since you don’t have any kids
Definitely... try not to stress about.
Get out and about in New interests and groups/clubs to meet people.
The more relaxed you are about it the easier it will happen
You can even find love in your 50s and 60s. Tons of people find love in their 30s
sure. i mean you still have more than half of your life in front of you.
Sure! I did! I even found it twice in my 40's and again in my 50's.
I think it absolutely is. I have seen it done with people I know
I hope so. I want to form a family. I don't ask for anything but a faithful husband that that wants kids.
Thank you. My grandma is currently praying for God to bring me luck. I met the user when I was 19 and he drained many years out of my life.
I was a naturally sweet person. I was a virgin when he met me.
Thank you. I think exercises (I'm currently doing Judo), eating healthy, rarely ever drinking and never smoking in my life is helping out.
Absolutely! It tended to make me much more cautious when I started dating again in my late 30s but I found the right one the second time around and 30 years later... somehow she is still with me.
I believe in miracles. 😊
Depends on your demands, what you bring to the table and how active are you willing to be.
I just want a faithful man that wants marriage and kids. This player made me waste years only to then tell me I wasn't ready enough... draining me all my years. He owes me over $1000 too... he never paid it back. Scumbag, user...
Well looks aren’t your issue thats for sure. Would have to know you more personally to see for sure
No, you have to just give up. When I turn 34 I'm gonna just kill myself by jumping off the world
It is possible at any age.
Love isn’t related to certain age✨💕
I hope it is incase I'm not married by then too
Try not to wait until the last minute. Don't rush; but don't dawdle, either. Keep your mind open to opportunities that may arise. Just be careful, and remember the power of the word "No" when it comes to sexual things.
You can find it in your 80s
Yes but I want a child
Yes.
hopefully
My girlfriend did at 32 with me.
It's possible, I hope lol 😆
For attractive people.
For other people, yeah. For me, no.
Sure. You just have to learn to like anal.
Yes but only if you have low standards.
obviously
I masturbate more as well
Give me some bitcoins, I'll date you
Of course.
No 34 is too old
I got brainwashed and lied to for years. That user drained my years. I was a naturally sweet, naive person that got tricked.
Yes.
Yeah it’s possible
Yes..
No... its not
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