I’m apparently so beautiful and am constantly complimented and hit on, but I’m always single. Why can’t I get snatched up?

[RosesAreRed2020]

So I go on a lot of first dates and nothing turns into a second. I know... you’re probably wondering what I’m doing wrong but I truly don’t think I am. I also don’t think there’s anything wrong with the guys. I’m not assuming I’m perfect and they’re the problem either. Just nothing has seemed to work out for me, whether I’m looking for someone or stop looking for someone. I am in really good shape and have done some modeling I’m a redhead and pale, tall 5’9 and skinny, am told all the time that I’m gorgeous. However, guys don’t really seem to pursue me or want to take things further past a date or even just a conversation. I see so many people around me who are in relationships but I am perpetually single. I have no idea what more to do and I’ve been so positive lately. But men don’t seem romantically interested in me at all so I’m feeling kind of depressed.
im a nice person and don’t say anything mean to anyone and I am usually really happy all the time. I work so hard on myself and my body and I’m just really disappointed in how my love life is going. Yes I have high standards but I’m not looking for perfect person with no flaws.

[Diodoro]

You saying something to these guys with your words and/or behavior that's doing it. Maybe you have a story you consistently talk about that these guys really don't want to hear. Maybe reference your ex too much.

Maybe talk about people in general too much. Maybe talk too much instead of asking him about himself, then letting him actually tell you. Maybe you're coming across as looking down on them. I don't know what but I know it's in your communication somewhere.

Just assuming you don't have a shrill voice/annoying laugh

[Kathryn19087]

Maybe she just didn’t choose the right guys. It’s not always a bad thing for why someone doesn’t call back, maybe they were insecure.

[Diodoro]

@Kathryn19087 she described the specific pattern of behavior of the guys that she's talking to. If it's guy after guy after guy after guy. It's not the man it's you

I say the exact same thing to my guy friends who are talking about girls. If it's girl after girl after girl after girl, you're doing something wrong. It's not everybody else

[Kathryn19087]

I disagree. Most men are looking for sex and maybe she didn’t put out. I don’t agree with the whole common denominator thing. Especially if someone is using dating apps-it’s normal for men to be flaky.
I had a friend who this happened to where it was many just first dates and that was it, but then she was asked on second dates and third dates and so forth until she got into a relationship. It could be just loss of confidence with dating and not going on enough. It’s like job interviews — going on several and not just a few until you land that dream one which could take multiple multiple tries to score.

[Kathryn19087]

Your rationale would work if we lived in a linear world. I’m a Mathematician at a bank on Wall Street, I literally analyze crazy patterns and algos all day and one thing people don’t understand about life and human behavior is how amorphous it is. There are so much complexity integrated into life that there are things that will never make sense in an objective way.

[Diodoro]

@Kathryn19087 to be frank I didn't read the entirety of your comment. I understand your disagree and that's completely your right to do so. But that is what it is.

In the vast majority of cases if any person has this much of a problem with the opposite sex it is something that they are doing, it's not just a matter of selection. Agree to disagree. That's it

[Kathryn19087]

Nope I am correct. Thank you though :-)

[Kathryn19087]

“Too much of a problem with the opposite sex” right, but a few dates with no follow up isn’t “too many problems” it’s actually quite normal. I also think she could be going for men below her league. If they’re intimidated then they won’t bother. It’s how you make someone feel, not whether or not they’re good enough.

[Diodoro]

@Kathryn19087 I have enough experience in this realm to know what girls who have successful relationships do versus girls who have regular complaints about men

Girls who take personal responsibility for their outcomes are the ones who succeed and have the relationships that they want. Girls who think like you that it's the men, are the ones who never get what they want

I would rather give girls information that would lead them to an outcome they actually want versus an outcome they don't want while they feel "right" as a coping strategy for not having what they want.

[Kathryn19087]

Right but what if none of the feedback is actually a problem she’s committing? Run down the entire list and what if there is literally, objectively nothing she’s doing wrong? If you’re doing nothing wrong, move on and have confidence and find someone who fits eventually.

[Kathryn19087]

And I don’t think men are the problem here. It might not be them either in the circumstance. Maybe it’s just not a good match.

[Diodoro]

@Kathryn19087 making a change in the face of consistent failure is the only way to know. Telling her to do nothing will ensure the same result

[Kathryn19087]

I’d tell her to just go for better people and keep being the awesome person she is. Thanks for your time but I’d prefer to actually have conversations with people who are smart :-)

[Diodoro]

@Kathryn19087 I like how I'm talking about ideas and you're making ad hominem attacks about my intelligence, when you're the one commenting on my comment.

Gonna take a swing and say you're single

[Interstate]

It is usually because of timing or you aren't destined to be married. I have been single for the past eight and a half years, and I have accepted the fact i am not meant to be involved or married. The most you can do is live your life day-to-day, and in the meantime get your mind off of it and move on with life.

[Kathryn19087]

I disagree. No one is “meant” to be anything. Everything people become is through their belief system and work. Life is a beautiful and non-linear process. work it.

[Interstate]

@Kathryn19087 If one is MEANT to be filthy rich, they WILL be rich. If they aren't meant (destined) to be filthy rich, it won't happen no matter how hard they try. It is all about what the big guy upstairs says we will or will not have.

[Vegasrunner]

This is easy. You're a Narcissist. Every w/ an inflated and what seems like inaccurate view of yourself. Even your responses give off the exact same tone. When the user suggests that perhaps it's something lacking in your personality you respond "I have a great personality too" I can't speak for why other men are unwilling to enter into a relationship w/ you but I certainly would not want to spend my time w/ someone like you, which may provide insight into your question.

[Kathryn19087]

Geeze... maybe she’s jus having bad luck. Not everyone who looks at themselves in a really positive light is a narcissist. You might be though, since you’re so confident in this opinion.

[Kathryn19087]

Maybe that’s not how someone speaks usually? Maybe they were just mad about their circumstance and fed up? Geeze dude... I’m sure you’re so great. Haha.

[Vegasrunner]

@Kathryn19087 Na she's a narcissist. Go back and read her remarks and show me one sentence where she expresses humility.

[VikingWarLord]

Because all these Beta males have ruined dating in the west.
They kiss the ass of EVERY female out there, even overweight obese ones.
Now we have average women walking around like 9s and 10s
it's gotten out of control because of the manginas and beta male simps!

[Kathryn19087]

What does this suggest about the author? Maybe she’s telling the truth.

[nachosaresexy]

Well, the good news is you don't seem to lack confidence. But on the other hand, seems you might look more positively at yourself than others who are spending time with you.

[RosesAreRed2020]

I have a lot of positive interactions with people. Friends, family, everyone I meet. I don’t think that’s true.

[Kathryn19087]

Okay and why are you single? (I looked at your profile). Maybe you view YOURSELF more positively than others. @nachosaresexy

[AnthonyJ01]

I don't knowxwhat you look like other than what you have described. You already have my first choice, your a redhead. I love redheads, but of course we are probably states apart and then there is the age thing. Don't be down on yourself. If you want, DM me.

[PeterSmith1983]

Your to beautiful guys think they have no chance, just ask guy out you like instead

[Yourfriend2021]

It's tough to find love in today's world. It's not you.

[LegendaryIcon]

stop answering this, people, she left the site already

[hhadeshatesme]

Maybe you’re lacking personality wise

[RosesAreRed2020]

Haha no I am not. I have a great personality too. Why is someone being single always for a negative reason?

[RosesAreRed2020]

I make sure conversations are 50-50, I get a lot of invites out places, I do everything in my power to make sure people around me have their needs met. I talk about funny things and also about things happening and ask people questions about themselves too.

[hhadeshatesme]

Being single isn’t a negative thing. I don't know you which is why I suggested maybe it had to do with personality if it wasn’t physical. You clearly don’t lack self confidence so maybe you have a big personality that may come off as obnoxious unintentionally

[Kathryn19087]

Or maybe she just hasn’t met the right person. Some people give up after a few dates if it doesn’t work out. A lot of men are intimidated by women nowadays. Gotta just keep your head up.

[In_Trance]

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