What’s your idea about true love? can it be found in these days and can it be remained in a long term relationship?

[Anonymous]

I mean at first we may feel love but after some time, this feeling will fade away. Do you think love can be remained between two people after 30 years of their marriage? Do you believe on the soal mate connection? Do you think falling in love with some one is important for marriage?

Yes

No

[Finchie40]

I like to believe it can be found but so hard to find , Every new relationship is exciting in the beginning , the connection the chemistry the affection and intimacy is the best it will ever be , then slowly it starts fading , resentments start to build , arguing and criticizing and belittling and assuming the worst case scenario , analyzing, projecting , accusing etc. In time those things start to build a wall around the both of you trust is broken, pointing fingers at each other for things that have gone wrong , playing a victim without realizing we ourselves are all imperfect people and we all have flaws and we all have selfishness in us , Most people get into relationships without looking at the big picture , they will change themselves to appease their partner because it is new and exciting not realizing they are burying the things that really matter to them the most because this is new and exciting to them , eventually they start to miss those things they really enjoy the most and start resenting their partner for not being interested in those things they really enjoy , why it’s best to find someone that has a lot in common with you not someone pretending to have a lot in common with you , If a partner tries to get you to stop something that you really enjoy doing they are going to resent you for that and hold it against you. Why it’s important to be honest with your partner from the very beginning , If you can’t be honest with your partner and keep it a secret that secret will come back to haunt you , For a relationship to work both people have to remove selfishness for each other, wear each other’s shoes and make each other their number 1 priority , and sacrifice for each other , if those things can not be done then you are best to not waste your time getting into a relationship with that person be cause eventually they just become a convenience to you and it feels like they are just using you and stringing you along until something better comes into the picture , So bottomline if you can’t remove selfishness for each other your relationship will be doomed

[Asker]

Comprehensive illustrations
Thanks 🙏🌷

[Finchie40]

No problem, just things i experienced and witnessed through out my life , I know I am not perfect but when it comes to commitment and giving your heart to someone we all want the same in return, but it won’t always be that way , there will be times you both disagree on things and butt heads and you both have a choice on whether you want to fix it and compromise or think it’s my way or no way , fighting to be right instead of accepting wrong and that’s where the resentments come into play , through the years those little resentments start to build to the point we ourselves tell ourself , why are we tolerating this , I deserve so much better , I am constantly giving without receiving , we start to feel used and a convenience, they don’t really love us they only love what they can get from us , if people stopped thinking grass is greener on the other side and both made each other a priority then love will grow , but people are selfish and only really want what’s best for them , they can’t sacrifice for each other because they think they are missing out on something that really isn’t there so they latch onto someone else thinking that person will save them from the misery they are going through with their partner and that’s when cheating and affairs occur and when that happens the relationship is already done, the cheater should just walk away and realize in themselves that they truly don’t love and value their partner but most cheaters will try to go back to their partners like it was a mistake and they will change and they will be better but the truth is they won’t because they are living with the guilt of their actions , to the point they become unsure if love really exists , my thing is if a partner is pushing you away and not giving you affection and intimacy , speaking negatively toward you , you are best just to walk away , and let them go , they are negative because they are allowing their own selfishness to take over them , they know it’s wrong

[Finchie40]

But they need an excuse to be right, so do them a favor and let them go , let them find someone else , let them be selfish, because the reality is they will be used just like they used you , and once they realize how good they had it with you they will try to come back to you and your job is not to take them back what so ever , realize in yourself you deserve better than that.

[caring__1]

Love is what two people choose to create and nurture. Too many people assume it is the other person's responsibility to keep a relationship new and alive. Without team effort, any relationship will peter out. The more people work together on a relationship, the deeper the emotional connection. Unfortunately, too many people are too self-focused and inconsiderate of others, so healthy relationships are hard to find.

[superdonkey]

I don't believe there's such a thing as true love can't we look for someone who can fulfill three basic needs and wants emotionally spiritually sexually

[Asker]

How can he/she fulfill our spiritual needs? What did you mean?

[superdonkey]

Sometimes you meet somebody and you feel as if you knew them forever as if you're one kindred spirit

[Asker]

So it’s a true love which can’t be found easily

[superdonkey]

And he would say yes it's difficult to find

[JohnK123]

I hope it can still be found in these days…
I think it takes commitment and an understanding of the other person

[2021biguy]

It's hard to find but still exists.

[Anonymous]

I think it still exist.

[Asker]

I hope