Why should men take responsibility for bad relationships where it's the women who have the power to choose?

[Anonymous]

Here both men and women complain about bad relationships, failed marriges, abusive relationships, and problems concerning the genders.

But ultimately it's the women who have the options to choose in most cases. I have always seen women always blame men for their bad relationships. Even if they cheat, or sleep with other guys they still blame the guy was not good enough.

If you are not extremely dumb, in most cases you can always tell difference between good and bad people. In some cases, you can't but if you are always choosing bad relationships then the problem is you.

[AmandaYVR]

No, no, no. You are way oversimplifying this.

Relationships are hard. It isn't usually/mostly about good vs. bad people. Moral vs. immoral. Sure, there are many girls who are attracted to bad guys (I just chatted with one yesterday about this, and there's more to it than you may think), and therefore there are bad guys who are just out for themselves, and y'all wonder why any girl ever goes for them. But the majority of relationships are two people getting together, with hopeful intentions, and it's just the innate difficulties of melding two people together, in house and home and love and sex and family and everything in between, that causes friction and arguments and heartbreak and tears and endings.

You're bitter, and it's clear. You can't hide it. Maybe you don't even want to. It's often how men deal with being hurt. In your defence, generally guys have to do the heavy lifting at the beginning, making yourself vulnerable - the approach - but after that, it's both people in the ring, and it's irrational to think that just because one asks and one says yes, that that carves out their destiny.

It is not her fault if relationships don't work out. My god, man, use your rational brain here. You men are always bitching about how emotional women are. Many of you guys don't understand feelings and the intricacy of communication. It's a sledgehammer approach, a lot of the time. Black and white, this or that, cause and effect. It frustrates the fuck out of you, and so you come up with conclusions, tactics, and new methods going forward. But guess what, life is mucky. We're all in the mud, flailing, trying to figure things out. Ain't no way not to get dirty. I don't mean nasty, I mean dirty. That's life. That's what happens when different people try to commingle their lives, and expose their soft underbelly to each other. Hurt feelings, and some anger, are justified, but what you cannot do is blame 'the other' as being entirely at fault. Get off your high horse, walk away from the edge, and take a few steps back into the middle ground. Compromise happens when neither party gets all that they want. They must each acknowledge each other's POVs, and both agree that neither is all wrong. Then you can each be partially right.

[purplepoppy]

I kinda agree on this. All too often you see girls chase the bad boy type then complain when he acts bad

[FilmGuy93]

Because we also choose whether to pursue the women?

[EmmaMary]

Congratulations on winning a Troll of the day award.

[Asker]

I asked this based on logic and curiosity not to troll. If you can actually write any answer based on experience that will be more appreciated.

[EmmaMary]

I have a feeling that you are the forums resident woman/female hater... And of course, always Anonymous.

[Asker]

It's a very logical question and there is no hate against women in any of it.

[EmmaMary]

Quote " I have always seen women always blame men for their bad relationships. Even if they cheat, or sleep with other guys they still blame the guy was not good enough." End Quote.

[Asker]

Based on my personal experience with family, female friends, and classmates, coworkers that I have known personally. Every woman blamed the guys for their failed relationships.
Recently one girl from a friend group ranted that nowadays all men are absolute garbage after being dumped by her friends with benefits as she has slept with three other men while they have an agreement of not sleeping with others.

[EmmaMary]

I'm still resting my case... Sorry.

[Devilmaycryy]

Well I mean... if he cheated, he is at fault ror cheating in that scenario. And, some people are very manipulative and utilize people's feelings or lie about being in love.

[Devilmaycryy]

Sorry I didn't get to continue my thoughts! I understand your frustrations. I think it should be less about focusing on gender, but the individual. There are certainly women who are the ones that cheat too, per say. Then, that means the fault is on her and the guy shouldn't be blamed then because he put his trust in her not to. I don't think the people who want to trust or love should be at fault

[Asker]

I am not frustrated. I asked this question per logic and experience. Men who are players are already known by all they have the reputations of being so still they get a countless supply of new women. It's not like they manipulated those girls. Whenever I have heard a bad relationship cry from any woman, it's always very clear the man was like that from the beginning, yet pursued the relationship.

[Devilmaycryy]

Well I've had experiences where they weren't like that in the beginning and I had no prior knowledge... sadly it makes me fear people and even affection now kinda. But I'm trying to get better. Sadly people just tend to be imperfect.