What are your thoughts on long distance relationships?

Question

Not everyones perfect match ends up living nearby. I think with enough patience everyone can find a way to be with another person.

TruthBringer · Accepted Answer

It is best if you do not pursue a LDR as they are notorious for failing. Especially when you and the other person have never met in real life, and most likely don’t have an strong & active plan to close the distance. Save yourself the heartache and find yourself someone locally. I used to be naive and therefore got in a LDR years back. I can tell you that it is an extremely miserable way to be in love. You wish and long more than you actually make memories. And worst of all is, that often you start to love a persona that doesn’t reflect the real person. Because often people act differently online than they do in real life. You’re more of a penpal than an actual partner. You cannot do even the little things that couples usually do like go to a mall, get a bite or go to the cinema. Even these little things that matter immensely are stripped away in LDRs.

Anyone who values their heart, time and energy won't bother themselves. Because if you really think about it, you're dating pixels rather than an actual person as you spent more time on a screen than facing an actual human being.

Middleman · Accepted Answer

It doesn't work, trust me as I've been there. You may find a lot of interests and much to talk about at first, but when it comes down to the nitty gritty, unless you are financially very well-off and have the means to constantly travel to your partners locale and stay with them, it can be a potential high burden for both sides, particularly when one side of the party doesn't want to put in the equal effort (or rather money and expenses) of meeting the other. That or if any one of the party wishes to remain in their country of residence for whatever reason.

SoftCliff · Accepted Answer

in my opinion, they can be quite challenging, especially if you've never met the other person in real life before. The Internet is impersonal and can create lots of misunderstandings between people. They can work, but they require a lot of effort and honest, thorough and open communication on both parts

-Both should have the financial means and ability to travel.

Both should discuss and agree upon how often you are realistically able to visit each other, and if that length of time is okay with both of you.

-Both should discuss and agree upon the “ground rules” of commitment for the relationship.

- Honestly, both people need to want each other like crazy.

In my experience, this desire is what fuels the need to try your hardest to make the relationship work, even through distance. You need to be damn convinced that this person is who you want, despite being so far away. If you’re feeling “meh” about the person, or uneasy about the long distance relationship itself, it’s going to unravel really quickly.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

long distance relationships do work. it just depends on the couple if they have great communication and much patience with the situation and each other.

there are couples who live less than an hour or 2-3hrs away from each other and yet they argue and someone cheats. there are those couples who live in another continent and yet they make it work. so it really depends on the couple. :)

don't let others make you think that all ldr don't work. people who say that are just not that patient and need constance touch and reassurance. if their top love language is physical touch, for sure they need their partner to be with them most of the time to cuddle, kiss, etc.

Brainsbeforebeauty · Answer

Not something I'd be interested in.. Isn't the whole point of being in a relationship having someone to spend time with, do things together? A virtual hug isn't quite the same as the real thing... I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone I have to travel to see or who has to travel to see me... What? Once a month? Once a year? Yeah, that wouldn't do it for me... That and I've seen where people have a long distance "partner" and still seeing or having sex with people where they live... Not saying it might not work for some people, but from what I've both seen and heard from others, it seems more like people setting themselves up for heartbreak 💔

Pinay_ako · Answer

Only for short term LDR and there’s a tangible promise we’d be together for real and in person.

Anonymous · Answer

Yea ofc they are ok but you have to move with them like you need a plan of what’s going to happen let’s say in 2 years.
What if you are married and your husband or wife goes to let’s say medical school in another state what’s going to happen you divorce them ? No!! You just create a plan of the future. I’ll meet you this and this time. We will be together finally after 3 years etc.

That ldr doesn’t work is a lie
I have dated literally in the SAME building and didn’t work out
I dated a ldr and turned out to be perfect , it was meant to be. Also we had a plan we were ldr 3 fucking years , I was in medical school. And what’s funny is that during those 3 years I met him so little. He was living in Japan 😆 . When he went back to Japan I only met him ONCE
we were communication every day for 1 year and after 1 yr I told him I would like to know you more! So covid etc started and we met probably 6 times more !! That’s it
Now we live together he found an IT job in the US bc that’s his major.

See if it’s meant to be it will happen
Too many heart breaks happen from Both CLOSE OR LONG DISTANCE it’s truth: common accept it close distance relationship suck TOO

DizzyDesii · Answer

They were good while they lasted. Not as hard as people think as long as you intend to live in the same area within a year or so. I just personally am not trying to be in another international ldr because they are more unpredictable than the different city/state. Overall, i like having physical space and as long as i can talk (I said talk not text) to the person daily, i dont need to see them daily. And i hate sharing a bed. My grandparents do too and they went from twin beds to different bedrooms under the same roof. She watches soap operas while gossiping on the phone and he collects stuff while watching westerns. Funniest shit ever.

dynamicyandere · Answer

It can get pretty complicated, takes a ton of trust, takes a lot of problem-solving, takes a lot of communication, takes a lot of commitment, and takes a lot of coordination.

It’s only worth it if the other person is truly exceptional and you really feel like you’re perfect for each other. It’s not something for a relationship you don’t feel 100% certain about.

It’s definitely a high-risk gamble. As a general rule, I’d say it’s best to avoid it if possible. But, there may be rare exceptions (e. g. You were in a close-distance relationship and they will temporarily be far away but the bond you built together is incredibly strong and you both don’t want to break up over distance and you both are ready to face the challenges that will come.)

Googlemyahoo · Answer

Don’t work from my experience. I was in a relationship from high school. We started dating when I was in my last year it was great. Girlfriend was two years younger. I went to college in my hometown when it came time for her she choose to go away.

I immediately suggested breaking it off. I’d been in college and met numerous people who were long distance and it didn’t work. She cried didn’t want to. Figured ok I’ll give it a shot.

Fucked a dude first week she was away lol. Cut her off but the fucked up part was anytime she came home she’d call to hang out saying she loved me etc. Back at school wanted nothing to do with me.

Looking back I should’ve stuck with my gut feeling and cut it off when I had the chance. I stayed loyal my first two years at college although there were plenty of opportunities. After that it was pure debauchery.

menina · Answer

I know that long distance relationships are not for me. I've been in one and it didn't work out. He didn't trust me and to be honest he was weird.

I would like to have a boyfriend, I'm 100% sure that my match doesn't live in the same country as me but I'm not getting into a LDR again.

They might work for some people but they're not for everyone.

Haha456 · Answer

I only see it as a short term temporary solution. If you both truly loved each other enough, you would travel all the way so you can be together permanently. Long distance relationships for years and years and years on end is very dissatisfying and unfulfilling. You spend more effort trying to make things work than to enjoy the relationship.

Tina19 · Answer

Currently i am in a long distance relationship and my boyfriend's profession keeps him busy i make adjustments because i want to be a supportive girlfriend the major thing that keeps our relationship strong is our love and trust on eachother

DaveJord · Answer

Deepens on the distance, and how often you see each other. My girlfriends lives 1.5 hours away from me... and we see each other every to every other weekend and that works out great for me. But any further or less than that I would not be about it at all.

In general when I hate them and would never do it, or recommend it to anyone, but I do not think my situation is a a long distance thing... not truly.

Dargil · Answer

Only worth it if you have a plan to be together in the future. I did this. Our LDR was 14 months and 8,900 miles. We had two conjugal visits a year apart. The rest of the time, it was1.5 hours a day, 6 days a week online on Messenger. There was no cybersex. I put an engagement ring on her finger the first visit at the very moment our relationship was "consummated". She believed I would honor my word. I did.

curiousbabyboo · Answer

If it's meant to be, it'll be. If your partner can't take care of their own sexual business when in distance, you're probably better of without the lust ridden relationship, this is assuming the typical relationship, not those fanxxxy open relationships.

ReasonCalm · Answer

They can only work if you both put in the time and energy needed, you have to be very creative and be able to switch things up when they are getting stale... It's not a matter of trust because every relationship requires that. Hopefully all long distance relationships will end up being a close one before things genuinely get too much...

Texasgal95 · Answer

Both people have to be willing to put in the effort. Long distance just takes a little more effort on both parties in to work

annabananna · Answer

My husband and I started off long distance. I think they can be good in the beginning but eventually you’ll need to move closer when things get more serious.

SkyCastle90 · Answer

Go for it. My best relationship started out long distance.

Ironic_Method · Answer

LDRs are difficult with thr lack of intimacy and it's hard to stay engaged.

That being said my wife and I were LDR for 2 years before we moved in together and I couldn't imagine myself being with anyone else.

Jacobbbb · Answer

Kinda painful. I would get lonely and want to see them and spend time w them, but the distance wouldn't allow that

mmaaaa · Answer

definitely hard but doable if both are all in on the relationship in my opinion

AsaKyo · Answer

I think they can work if it's with the right person

Anonymous · Answer

If there is an end in sight, I think it’s okay. But in perpetuity, it’s not a good situation. The other scenario I could see is if you lived together for a period and your SO needed to temporarily relocate for like a year.

Also, I’m of the belief though that if your long distance relationship isn’t working, it’s likely not going to work once you move in together

hIopinionated_ · Answer

Lots of possible cheating and or mistrust will go on. I’ll vote, not worth it

Anonymous · Answer

Awful, that was my last relationship, and that's part of why he left me. So, I was just a complete waste of time and money for when we did see each other. Plus, he wouldn't just let me move in with him for some reason.

YollyM · Answer

They are for sexually disciplined people who are truly committed to each other but are independent.

TallAnon · Answer

Unless you actively work to make it not long distance, asap.. it's not gonna work out.

Guardian45 · Answer

LDRs CAN work, but require STRONG commitment and DAILY effort!

JohnK123 · Answer

I like them it’s just harder than meeting them irl

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Stupid. You can't see each other nor touch each other. Waste of time.

WhiteBoyChill · Answer

Dont enter them unless you’re willing to actually travel to the other person

Anonymous · Answer

Pointless. Ldr's are basically for people that want to still say they're in a relationship. But really aren't in one. 🤣

Anonymous · Answer

My first one was a disappointment. Second one I got married. Going on 10 years now. They can work.

MTC29 · Answer

Tried it and it failed... miserably.

Anonymous · Answer

99% of the time, they go nowhere.

MisssA · Answer

Been there done that, don’t recommend it

katiesmuff · Answer

They are tough

StevieNix · Answer

Ignorance is bliss.

HumeyraHaktanır · Answer

Honestly I love this type of relationship

bean2k21 · Answer

True love transcends space and time.

Anonymous · Answer

I am against all type of relationship including this.. so no no no

exitseven · Answer

I had one and would not do it again.

AndrésC64 · Answer

Not a real relationship.

katestar · Answer

I agree with you on that

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I agree with you. I think it's totally possible.

LavLavLuv · Answer

I think it’s not for me

Zolly99999 · Answer

I can't do them..

legalboxers · Answer

I've been in many

Twalli · Answer

The hardest and most likely to fail.

pink-jilly · Answer

It’s def not for meee😀

Ringstretch · Answer

It's always good to make new friends

Anonymous · Answer

They are a waste of time in my opinion.

ZS007 · Answer

doesn't work

ericakim · Answer

it's really2 hard

JesseJayNeak · Answer

They don’t work

fireforeffect · Answer

They do not work...

softhoney · Answer

Never really dated anyone so I don't know

Ronnie_Tulsa · Answer

Im all for them, i don't need much

quyenpvluxcasa · Answer

tôi muốn tham gia

Marshymallow · Answer

Mehhhh

sheikalana · Answer

Not to me.

ZenJen444 · Answer

Pointless

What are your thoughts on long distance relationships?

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