What do I do when I feel so lonely sometimes because I miss being in a relationship & took time for myself but just miss having that special someone?

[Paulalove98]

Updates

+1 y

I've been single for a year and a half.

Updates

+1 y

I also am aware im getting old... im gonna be 24 so i dont have all the time in the world😞

[MrOracle]

In order to get the outcome you want, you need to start taking action TODAY. The big picture is: you need to start dating, and specifically, dating with intention (of getting married and having children).

This means you need to be looking for a man who (ALREADY!) has the qualities of a good husband and father. The priorities need to be his morals, values, and life-goals, and those need to be compatible with yours. His looks or his height or his current income mean relatively little by comparison.

And you need to be looking for these men IN PERSON, out IN THE REAL WORLD and not on social media or dating apps. Perhaps one woman in 10,000 finds a husband on dating apps - and if you followed up after 3 years, I'd bet that 2/3 of those couples are no longer together. The success rate of dating apps is so abysmal that it's wrong to even call it a "success rate" - it's really a failure rate.

The guy you are looking for is extremely unlikely to be a "hot guy" or a wildly successful guy (because the latter work too much - you'd probably never meet him because he never goes home), or incredibly exciting. He's far more likely to be the guy who quietly and competently does your taxes or works on your car. "Exciting" guys are almost always exciting because they're DANGEROUS - to you, to themselves, and to anyone around them. This makes them interesting, but they are also often disastrous.

Given that you'd probably want 2 years from the time you meet the guy until you get pregnant, this doesn't leave you with all that much time to find a quality guy and meet your goals (and younger is better for having kids). This is why you need to start making things happen now. People who tell you to wait until your 30s are setting you up for failure, and they won't be around to hear your anger if you follow their advice, so, don't.

[ohsheeT]

Paula love long time no see okay let me start again from where I was at a couple years ago as a matter of fact what you should do is read the last question that I just answered it will explain everything that I've tried to explain to you for the last past couple years one of these days you're going to DM me at least I hope you do so you will stop holding yourself back you have everything in the world going for you but you hold yourself back in so many different ways it's unreal I remember answering the same questions from you and I wish we would have talked back then because I don't think that you would feel the way that you feel today and I think you would be way far advanced but it's your choice for whatever reasons it's all your choice we get to choose who we want to be in life by the things we say and do you can have anything in this world do you want to you just have to understand how to get it and it starts with you

[AmandaYVR]

Aww this is so sweet. If only you and all the other millions of male counterparts out there could magically find your way to each other, and solve this solvable problem. (That's not being sarcastic, I mean it.)

Maybe you need to start coming up with ways to get out there, go do more activities where you might meet people. Do you have girl friends you can sign up for classes of something with? Preferably something you don't know that much about, and a guy may know more. They really enjoy being 'the man', the knowledgeable one. Some even like teaching fellow classmates, helping.

[Bolty44]

It happens to everyone we need someone who knows about us and also listens cares and gives attention so better find that someone from your old friend list or start searching for someone to date if you don't wanna date then you gonna have to cope with drugs which includes watching romance content and doing your dream job

[NathanDavis]

24 is not old... you're just starting at life, lol

[Lizzyglizeto2]

And who says that
I'm single and I'm 62

[NathanDavis]

@Lizzyglizeto2 you're just getting started as well... go for it!!

[Lizzyglizeto2]

Yes
I'm new here I was told it's really fun here so I'm just keeping myself busy with this lol

[Jacobbbb]

Sometimes that's just life. Hell I feel lonely too at times being single sucks especially after a big break up. You just gotta pull yourself up and stay confident. The right dude will come to you

[Fromdusktilldawn]

Many here never had someone and survived. A year is nothing, I never had anyone. Find a distraction, a hobby, talk to friends or go on a girls trip.

[Paulalove98]

I wanna be a mom one day tho😞

[Fromdusktilldawn]

But with 23 you still are young. Why not with till 33?

[Paulalove98]

Im hoping between 27-30

[MrOracle]

@Fromdusktilldawn Because at 30, the average woman has less than 10% of her eggs left, and fertility begins to fall off. Women were meant to have children primarily in their late teens and 20s - that's how human biology works. I don't know how much information you have available on your family history, but I'd bet that at least 3 out of 4 of your great grandmothers had their first child before their 20th birthday. Except among the upper class (who, largely, were the only ones going to college) prior to WWII, most women got married and had at least one child before their 21st birthday, and that goes back to the beginning of recorded history and even to the bone records from pre-history.

The norms we are used to today are VERY recent - having really started in the 1960s with Marxist-based Third Wave Feminism in combination with hormonal birth control, and the trend of marrying at much older ages really started with my generation (GenX) and expanded with yours. It's not the norm at all, and it's caused the birthrate to plummet. That's going to be REALLY bad news for your generation, because the tax base is going to collapse (no social security, medicare, etc. for you), and so will the labor base. Japan is a generation ahead in this regard, and they're already experiencing huge problems and their economy is suffering. China is right behind them, but Europe and the US aren't far behind either.

Even the ancient Greeks understood that society collapses without children:

[B4852]

You just keep moving forward, and look for someone who treats you right.

[Jltakk]

You focus on being the best version of you. You're far more experienced at dating than I am though, and my source of loneliness comes from a much different place

[20yearsolder]

Get on the hunt for that new special someone?

[Bigjake1019]

I’ll be your special someone ❤️

[Cheerfull009]

Get some boyfriend and enjoy