I still feel jealous even though I know it's a normal behavior, am I wrong for feeling this way though?

[Anonymous]

I know it's a normal behavior for guys to look at pictures of other women but when I see the ones my current partner looks at, I feel super jealous because I look nothing close to them. Like they'll be skinny with a small waist and curvy "where it matters". I'm on the chubby side but he tells me that he still finds me attractive. It's hard to believe him when I've seen the girls he looks at... I'm doing what I can to lose weight and try to look better for him so that maybe he'll see me like he sees them. I guess I'm asking for advice on how to not feel so jealous about it and ways to boost my confidence. Any advice will help, thank you. For reference I'm 23 and my partner is 27.

[caring__1]

Jealousy has nothing to do with the other person. It's merely a projection of our own sense of inadequacy. Yes, you can project out jealousy till the person leaves your life, but someone will replace that person, and you'll still feel jealous. If you find yourself feeling jealous, look only at yourself. Ask yourself what your expectations are and whether they are realistic. If they are unrealistic for you, get rid of them. If they are realistic, set a plan of attack and consistently follow through and measure your progress.

As far as it being normal for guys to look at pictures of other women, normal just means common, not functional. Yes, guys are visual, and they will notice what is around them, but that doesn't mean they need to actively seek out more viewing, especially when they know it is uncomfortable for their partner. It sounds like your partner is filling a void. Find out what that void might be, so you can help fill it. It could be he's tired of hearing you put yourself down and just wants to enjoy without hearing negative self-talk. It's no fun being with someone who doesn't see the value he/she brings to the relationship. Who wants to give compliments... only to have them minimized or denied completely? If you're not wearing him down with negativity, he may just be an insensitive, inconsiderate partner. Never judge yourself as a result of the dysfunction of others.

[Guy13]

Do gym and get a waist. Truth is he must adore your personality, depth, and character. The other truth is a bubbled ironing board is not attractive.

The bottomline is you can act defeated or close the gap between you and Insta. Hopefully, he will respond to your efforts in a love you guys way.

He might simply be addicted to pic cruising as it is same as Porn. Porn, according to neurological medical journals, rewires the brain. I hope this all works out as you wish.

[Guy13]

How are things going with this?

[PrettyPriya]

I guess my question is why does he feel the need to look at other women? I mean, is this a constant obsession of his? I would talk to him about how it makes you feel. If he has any respect for you, he will not want to make you feel bad and stop.

As far as the feeling of jealousy, I think that is somewhat natural for all of us at some point in life. We are often envious of others that have physical traits we would rather have.

It isn't an attractive character trait, but we all wish we were different at some point. Best to remind yourself that you are who you are and be thankful for the things you do have.

There is no need to go and change your physical appearance for someone else. Besides, he is with YOU. I cannot imagine he doesn't find you attractive or why would he be dating you?

The best advice if you want to lose some weight is talk to your doctor about healthy eating and exercise plans. They can help put a safe programme together to help you to your goals.

[JohnK123]

It’s never wrong…. But it’s not good to feel jealous