What would you think of a guy who wants to ruin a girl's life after she cheated on him?

[Anonymous]

[virtue2332]

I'm am unaware of the facts In your situation so I'll tell you about mine and you can take what you want from it. When I was much younger and insecure and jealous I made a statement to the girl I was dating from a pure insecure, immature mindset meant to manipulate and deter her from cheating on me. Dad cheated on my mom and I let it affect my first two relationships. I can see now that I drove two good people away from me because I obsessed over this to the point of asking if they cheated or thought of cheating which in my brain was cheating straight immature jackals of a kid won't say man because men don't act that way. What says was exactly what you are going through. I made it clear that I was going to ruin them and thier relationships if they cheated and they wouldn't even know what was going on. I was going to be the nicest guy on the surface and destroy everything they loved if they hurt me like that. I think I remember seeing how devastated my mom was when the relationship with my dad ended and I was attaching the anger I felt to this imagined scenario because I was afraid of my dad. Did I go out of my way to actually ruin this girl not intentionally. I mean I probably said a few mean things in the beginning out of anger that I knew would get back to them. I quickly realized that I was being a jack ass and how much my words affected someone whom didn't deserve that. Especially when she started attributing things that she was going through to me. Car got broken into it had to be me. Someone didn't say hi that use to had to be because I was telling them things about her. I made her paranoid and that affected her relationships with others causing her to spiral down further. Now people where questioning her stability but she attributed it to me turning people against her. The fucked up thing was I wasn't doing any of these things. It didn't mean I was also not responsible because it was my immaturity and my words that put her in this state of paranoia. I didn't know how to fix it because anything I said or did was part of a plan in her eyes. It was all my fault. Most men can say and do things in a fit of anger and move on. It's why we can fight another guy and want to kill them and have a beer with them after it's over. I don't know many men that would actually take the time to go through with ruining his ex life. It's petty. Only someone with huge mental health issues is going to attempt this but it rare. There is a higher chance that they would have tried to act out aggressively and tried to fight someone over a long drawn out process. That said don't poke a snake. Don't engage in back and forth arguments or saying negative things because if you keep someone in that angered state then it's going to drag it out. I eventually with the help of her family got her to see a counselor and took part in her recovery and was able with help to explain why I said those things where it came from and how I was not a threat and eventually moved passed it. I fixed my issues and have been married 20 years this May and attribute the success to understanding the impact of what I say and how to communicate all learned from the counselors and therapist from that one incident. It was scary to be honest because if something did happen to her I would have been suspect number one and people would have said she was having all these issues with me. She is fine married as well. We don't hang out as couples but have hung out as part of a larger friend group on multiple occasions.

[Summeroflove]

Well doing this to someone’s car can land you in jail Carrie Underwood. LMAO.


In all seriousness. I understand it hurts being cheated on. But don’t waste your time on someone like that. They’ll destroy their own lives sooner or later with the choices they make.



Most people who seek revenge even if they get it. They hurt themlsbes in the process. Someone you HATE shouldn’t have this much control over your life.



In fact when you forgive they loose a lot of power they have over you. When you start to pity them in a odd way. You’ll love them.


But you don’t have to let them back into your life again to hurt you

[Aerissa_Jade]

I understand the desire, both when I've had it and others have had it against me.

I'm a bit of both though, I don't mind a little revenge but I don't want to destroy someone's life. I simply want to make it a little more difficult for awhile.

Destroying someone's life, making them so they have nothing to lose makes them extremely dangerous. At least it could potentially, it depends on the person and their personality.

For me personally, after I get a little revenge... I forgive, move on and block them in anyway possible.

[sage2021]

I've been cheated on by my ex-husband and his homewrecker who ruined our lives. My son didn't have a Dad ever because of them.
Sometimes when someone cheats on you, you want equal justice for what you are feeling.
Some people need to let it all out like the guy that trashed her car.

He did what he had to do.

[Finchie40]

Even though it sucks to be cheated on and it hurts that someone you gave your heart to can just shit on it , The best revenge on a cheater is to just move on with your life and realize they aren’t worth your time anymore , pretty much exempt them from your life , and act like they don’t exist , When that cheater spies on you, to see what you are up to and notices you are fine and living a happy content life it will hit them like a ton of bricks on how much of a piece of shit they were, I had a few exes that cheated on me and I just moved on , each one of them tried coming back into my life and I just laughed and told them they had their chance and they blew it, I don’t take cheaters back period

[OlderAndWiser]

Seeking revenge means that th other persons feelings are still important to you, and that means YOU are not ready to move forward.

[AviatorTom]

That guy has no class and lacks self-control. If her cheating upset you that much, move on guy!

[Miristheiss]

Decisions have consequences.

It is basic policy that the cheating needs to be outed. Parents need to know, all the friends, any partners the other cheater may have. Boss's if they are cheating with a co-worker. That is just standard practice.

All cheaters lie and like to control the narrative and make themselves look like victims and make it seem like the person they cheated against was really the "bad guy". You reveal it to the entire world and provide proof if you have any.

Let them then deal with the consequences of their deed. Firings, shame, shambles.

Is the scenario you are envisioning more elaborate then just revealing the cheating to everyone we know and the other guy's girlfriend or wife?

What "ruining" are you envisioning?

[lightbulb27]

I think he's hurt, doesn't understand you, himself, or what happened. I think he's possibly dangerous, but probably just sad and angry.

I think he's in trouble for a while unless he has good support.

...

I think she did him a good favor by screwing him over early in the relationship, rather than trashing decades of his life.

I think he picked the wrong woman, for she doesn't understand "her body is a temple".

I think he should be out here asking questions.

I think he should remove himself from the female that is failing.

I think part of the reason for cheating could be on him, so he needs to examine what happened.

[bolverk]

Why would the girl be surprised if the guy is angry after being cheated on, and wants everyone to know what the girl did after breaking his trust?

How would she feel if the situation was flipped?

And don't come the 'it was just sex, it meant nothing' that doesn't wash.

Irrespective of sex, Cheating is wrong, If your married get a divorce, and give your spouse the easiest divorce possible instead of cheating.

If you engaged/in a relationship, give your SO the easiest break up possible instead of cheating.

[Anonymous]

Wasted effort. I mean I get it. It sucks! But she cheated on you. You can't undo it. And I get it's a blow to your pride. But stop and think about it for a moment. She cheated on you. Odds are it's not the first time she cheated. Odds are it won't be the last time she cheated. Odds are she's with a guy now who isn't opposed to cheating on her. When you think about it that way you just won. Because that piece of trash is no longer in your life. So in a weird f***ed up way you should be thanking her. Because character DOESN'T change. And she just showed you her lack of it. Smile knowing your life is free of that train wreck. 🙂

[Spongebobssocks]

that he is wasting his time. the woman will get her karma wether it is being gang raped, beaten, robbed etc whatever who cares.. her karma will come. Every action on this earth has a reaction so if i were him i'd just level up and meet a woman thats better

[OfMiceandMen]

I mean, he can't very well say he took the highroad, but she should have known what she was potentially getting into when she cheated on him.

It isn't the route I would take if I was the guy, but, I don't really have much sympathy for her either. Choices have consequences.

[Fabiloso]

Well depends how ruined their life would be. Is it a few popped tires? Having sex with their friend? Stalking her boyfriend and pranking him hard until he's incompasitated because of too many concussions. Pranking both of them would honestly be the most fun. There's just such a spectrum of horrible to bad to hilarious embarrasing fun.

[sheenagwapa]

that's just cruel... if my ex cheated on me i'm just gonna scream and express myself online anonymously and cry and eat and i'm done


i don't believe in forcinh people who hen it comes to love what's the point? do you wanna be with someone who doesn't live yoy? i surely don't so if the person leave or cheated i will get mad because i'm so hurt but i can let them go

[petitedollbabee]

Petty and immature. It’s horrible to be cheated on, that’s true, but heal from your wound and move on with life. Don’t go chasing after revenge.

[LovrUFFAllls]

You are absolutely right with that! :P
Do you mind dming? We talked earlier actually :O

[MrOracle]

Living well is the best revenge. If you want to "get back" at someone, improve your own life and situation. That will make you feel far better than seeking revenge, and IF that person still cares about you, nothing will sting them more.

[Vesuvius87]

Very pathetic and alarming at the same time. We don't like obsessive nor possessive man that can't learn to walk away. It makes me think that he has a problem if things go sour, he has stress in his life or someone wrongs him.

[EmmaMary]

Two Wrongs Do Not Make A Right.

Whilst what you did to him was an absolutely horrible and most awful thing possible, he now needs to come to terms with the situation and move on with his life.

[arodriguez664]

The best revenge is always just being happy without the person who hurt you. If a guy seeks to ruin his ex's life after she cheated he's being petty and probably needs therapy

[Anemone978]

I don't know.. you should know better than to cheat on psycho's lol Or I don't know maybe just dump the person before you start a new relationship...

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

No one deserves to have their life ruined, and you need to call the police every time he contacts you in any way. Sure you cheated, or he cheated, but life is too short to have your life ruined.

[itismeyouknow]

I think that is too drama, even that is a guy or girl.
You can dislike them or hate them, but to ruin their life is waste your time, your mind will be not happy for longer time. Let karma do its duty or you should move on. You are better than spending your time thinking or doing anything about them.

[Anonymous]

Well if she cheated on him doesn’t she deserve it? I mean that’s what women would tell their friend if he cheated on her. Key his car, spray paint it, etc. In answer to your question he’s a tool if he does something like that.