Why do I crave attention from women so much?

[alonso]

I'm not entirely sure when it started, but I've always had this deep craving for attention and validation from women. As a child, I never felt like I got enough attention from my parents. They were always busy with work, and I felt like I was constantly competing with my siblings for their attention.

In school, I wasn't the most popular kid. I struggled to fit in with my peers and felt like I didn't have many friends. However, I noticed that when I got attention from girls, even if it was just a compliment or a smile, it made me feel good about myself. It was like a temporary high that I couldn't get enough of.

As I got older, this need for attention from women intensified. I started to seek out female attention more and more, whether it was through flirting or dating multiple women at once. I even became known among my friends as a ladies' man.

At some point, I’ve realized that this constant need for attention from women is becoming a problem. I would do anything to get their attention, even if it meant sacrificing my own values or beliefs. I know deep down that this isn't healthy behavior, but I don’t know how to stop.

[Anemone978]

I had a very similar up bringing where I felt my parents didn't love me because I was the GOOD child so no one ever paid attention to me.. but it made me turn out to be very manipulative and vengeful person. I would always get my siblings in trouble by doing things and framing them for it. I was constantly sad and didn't feel like I was enough.. So I too needed male attention to make me feel good about myself. I learnt now that you just need to love yourself and believe in yourself because no one can give you the fulfillment you are seeking.
It is horrible when you constantly seek validation but don't seem to get it.. it's just an endless cycle. I was never happy with my husband because I felt I needed more men to love me.. one persons love wasn't enough for me. I always would look for guys to want me and flirt with me on the computer, then I would get rid of them because they too didn't make me feel good enough. Also some would just ghost because I wasn't putting out for them or not wanting to meet, then that would make me feel worthless and then the cycle would continue, find a new person flirt and get validation.. feel bad about myself and what I am doing and start again. LOL it is totally a stupid way to live. I learnt I don't need many but I still want that ONE who will love me, be there for me and love me unconditionally..

[Peter_Penetrator]

Women can be very comforting when the need arises.


Google: co-dependent relationships. They are unhealthy.


When you feel as though all you need is a good woman to make you happy, you are co-dependent.


No one is perfect. You can have the most incredible woman in your life, but because she isn’t perfect, you will end up disappointed quite often. No one is perfect. Even us men.


Then we start using logic to figure her out, and start confronting her, that makes shit worse. I have been taught that a women's reasoning is dictated by her emotions and a man’s reasoning is, of course, dictated by logic.


When men use logic to influence a woman, you begin screwing with her emotions. Hence why things go to shit.


Women say things like, “I need space.” because with our attempts to “reason” with them, they begin to feel smothered.


The only way they can catch their breath, is to run as far away as possible. Then we panic, and lose our shit, because her needing space, to us, logically, we are losing her.


It is important for men to have “distractions” that offer up other opportunities to make ourselves happy.


When a man is in a relationship, or a marriage, it is important for him to know that when the shit hits the fan, and she walks away, he is able to confidently say, fuck it. I will still be happy without her.


Men and women should only be together as to add a new avenue of happiness.


This will sound fucked up, but relationship’s need to be one of many hobbies for both partners.


If you give a woman the space to miss you, you will only be without her for brief moments that will be spread out over decades as a couple.


When she misses you, she will always come home to you, every night, and snuggle up to you as the two of you fall asleep.

[Peter_Penetrator]

Thanks to those that that liked my post.

[GoodEnoughThen]

Seeking validation, feeling attractive to others on multiple levels, is self-affirming (if/when we get that affirmation) is part of normal growth. It contributes to our feelings of confidence and well being as we move through the world. But if we don't get it in a way that we believe to be true for ourselves, we can start to get a bit obsessive about wondering and worrying about it. We may even changes our ways, our vlues, to sort of force/milldly manipulate others to see us, to validate us in ways we believe we wish to be seen and valued. This is a cycle, an ongoing struggle, that without some moderation in perspective and attitide we ultimately lose. It may be beneficial to let go of obsessively focusing on trying to get affirmations from external sources and take chances on exploring our inner beliefs, especially limiting beliefs that we subconsciously hold onto, ie- what do we believe about ourselves that makes us feel unworthy or un-good. It's not attention from others that we want so desparately crave but rather the ultimate feeling of being ok with ourselves. The affirmation or lack thereof from others continuously shaping (positively/negatively) that reality. I struggle with this daily as we probably all do.

[sunflower00]

It’s natural to crave attention from the sex you are attracted to, or just other people in general, but there is a point where it becomes too much. Well done for realising that this has become a problem and well done for trying to get help.


Problems like this will usually stem from something - it might be worth trying therapy or counselling if you can? Also, when we are confident in ourselves and love ourselves we don’t crave that attention as much. It’s definitely worth practicing self love! It sounds cringe but honestly helps so much.

[Steelcore5280]

In my personal and honest opinion, you are what I call a "Blue Pilled Man.' I kinda used to be one of those guys. Then I started finding male role modesl to follow all over in the Manosphere and whatnot, as well as pretty shocking videos of women doing things I didn't expect, that turned me into what is called a "Red Pilled Man."

I used to strongly desire female attention, but I don't really give too much of a shit anymore whether they give me attention or not. There are important things in life to do, worshiping women is not one of them.

I recommend a channel on YouTube called Mediocre Tutorials and Reviews, if you care to do a little digging, my friend.

[Unit1]

😆 you remind me a little of myself.

I love women. I love doing pretty much many things with women.

Don't sweat it. You're not weird for craving interactions with women.

Your problem is not having boundaries with women if you go as far as sacrificing too much of yourself for them. Are you paying for women on Onlyfans or do you always squander money on women?

The point is how you stop yourself from being Walked over by women is not something anybody can do for you unless that somebody is right next to you and hope its not a misogynistic MGTOW member.

[stoicity]

First of all thanks for sharing and being so honest with yourself. Whatever you're going through is very humane. Parenting is not easy, when it comes to multiple childrens. Our novel perception of care is totally different than what they might have to offer. You need a role model in your life and it's very hard when it's not your parents, in almost all social interaction your insecurities will creep in. I would highly recommend you to accept this truth that you need someone to resiprocate you, and be open about it to the people you talk to. Start with the girls in your circle. Being honest with yourself is an undefeatable strenght, and any social conflict has more value than dishonest harmony.

Life is short, explore.

[Finchie40]

Even though I got my heart shit on by women , I still go for it , hoping to find one that truly has a good heart and stands by my side no matter what , That makes me her priority like I do for her , but sadly I haven’t found her yet , but I keep trying

[BoobSlayer]

Cravings for attention are often connected to underlying desires. For Boobslayer, it's a desire for boobs. I'm sure you already know this, but boobs are absolutely amazing and I just want to constantly talk about them and show the world how much I love them! I just can't help myself when it comes to my passion for cha-chas!

[Random_g]

It's normal desire to seek people attention but that being normal doesn't mean it's healthy..

I was just reading a book and it talked about this issue and apparently it's a form of lacking confidence and self-worth.. So if this is the case start from here..

[CallmeTheKnight]

You lack discipline thats why. This need that’s growing will turn you into a desperate and lonely man one day. You need to get a hold of yourself and don’t blame this on your parents not giving you attention. You’re almost 40 years old man…. Come on you got to get a hold of yourself. You’ve received enough attention and likely slept and dated enough women to know what you’ll accept and deny….

[BryanMoore]

This sounds like the kind of revelation that people have after years of therapy so good on you for realising this for yourself - from there you can learn to be more aware of when it happens and to change things!

Hopefully you can learn to validate yourself along the way!

[lightbulb27]

lack of attention/nurturing from your mother when you were young...

are there other issues... trust, shyness?

[FilmGuy93]

It's flattering... it's nice to feel wanted.

Plus... let's just be real... as unpleasant as interacting with most women can be, it's nothing short of a treat when the interaction is good.

[Nikki1989]

Because it is natural. The ones that claim they don't need women are generally the ones that women don't want anyway.

[slatyb]

Welcome to the heterosocial club. One of my favorite things is having a conversation with an intelligent woman.

[KrakenAttackin]

Bro, this obsession with female attention will end badly for you. You need to channel this energy into other more productive avenues.

[WhiteBoyChill]

What I find strangest is how this guy calls himself a “ladies man”, when Chads don’t act that way.

[TooHot2Care]

You should look into stoicism.

because the irony of it all is this: until you can take it or leave it, you’re never gonna get it the way you need it.

[KrakenAttackin]

Yes. Stoicism is the core of a stable and fulfilled man in this day in age. When men are told we are worthless, replaceable, expendable, interchangeable, and toxic; retreating within is the salvation.

[TooHot2Care]

@KrakenAttackin tbh, anytime a woman or man tells someone they are replaceable based on their gender alone, just assume they are projecting. I mean really, doesn’t that sound absurd to you? Someone is replaceable based on their sex or gender…? Which completely skips over the intrinsic value of an individual…? It’s like all of these new age feminists and misandrists just skipped philosophy and assumed they knew shit.

[Juxtapose]

That's normal for lonely people to feel. Make sure to maintain your boundaries and have self-respect, you deserve no less.

[MementoMori777]

Cause humans werent created to be alone, it's why Adam got eve.

[es20490446e]

You crave what you don't have.

Usually because you crave it in a way that doesn't really fulfill you.

[Tina19]

How is your relationship with your mom since childhood you have to find out that to know the reason

[Grubhub]

Me too but I’m younger than you so hopefully I recover by the times I’m your age. I think it’s because I don’t have many friends and I see myself as a loser

[Grubhub]

I’m not close with my family either

[king34]

I have a very simple solution watch Andrew tate. Learn from him. You'll be better in no time

[sunflower00]

^ Not good advice

[king34]

chick's like @sunflower00 will gladly accept attention from guys like you but truly has no good will toward you and doesn't care at all about you bettering yourself and your life, dont ever take advice about women from a woman unless its family, trust me its a conflict of intrest, thats a good way to get used. I'm telling you brother, my whole life turned around a year ago when I started applying the tates advice. Your other option is keep simping and just live like that which if that's what you want its your life, Good luck to you bro.

[king34]

And as for @sunflower00 since you went out of your way to respond to me bc tates name is so triggering to people like you, id be curious to know what negative effect you think tate has on men. I already know what you're gonna say I just wanna hear your ignorance just to confirm my suspicion.

[king34]

@sunflower00 exactly thats what i thought. just another npc spewing your pre-programed responses with no actual knowledge or awareness or deeper thought or reasoning or logic or morality or understanding of the world around you. a literal non player character. L

[sunflower00]

@king34 Do you think people just sit on their phone all day? I have better things to do than be on here 24/7 - don’t know why you’re so pressed about me not replying within 24 hours!

Why are you saying I will gladly accept attention from guys like him but don’t care about him bettering his life? I don’t want his attention at all, I have a boyfriend, I genuinely just want the best for him.

The problem with Andrew Tate is he spews misogyny and causes guys like you to think all women are ‘the same’ and to live a bitter, angry life. There’s so much wrong with him. I am not going to waste my time going through it with you.

[king34]

@sunflower00 i said girls like you, and its still a conflict of intrest because your looking at things from a female perspective not from a perspective of oh let me.

so basically npc responses, he doesn't teach all women are the same, most women are the same at heart tho same for men. and literally nothing tate teaches is about being bitter or angry, you have never watched tate have you lmao. you just proved my point perfectly, you dont want this guy to watch andrew tate because of a percieved threat to your intrest as a woman, andrew tate has freed houndreds of thousands of men from depression, from anxiety. men especially young men are harder working and becoming stronger and more capable, but for your selfish reasons (nonsense reasons by the way) you would rather this man be stuck in this rut for the rest of his life so you dont want whats best for him you want what you think is best for you (women in general)
this is what i mean by conflict of interest you will protect your way of life you love having all these simps who have no confidence you love men having nothing but chasing you, so you will protect that rather even at the expense of our mental health our lives etc.

A COMPLETE BOT
i just wanna hear you say one thing outside of your ignorant pre-programed responses like say something logical thats rooted in reality that is wrong with tate. there are real answers because he's not perfect. but all you have are the bot, npc, nonsense answers.
so do you think millions of men are lying?

[king34]

@sunflower00 i was in the darkest depression of my life i spent 10 years in it, i tried professional help did nothing, i tried meds didn't work, i tried leaning on friends, or women, didn't work. i litterally tried everything and still i was getting worse and worse i was planning to end it. then i find andrew tate and he teaches me things that no one else would, he says life isn't supposed to feel good all the time if you feel like crap thats a natural sign that you need to improve your circumstance, he says go to the gym which is proven to decrease stress depression and anxiety. he talks about how as a man i have the responsibility to become strong capable and stable for my family and the people around me he talks about how in his personal experience god rewards hard work, he talks about how we have so much potential but we waste it everyday focusing on nonsense, he talks about how depression doesn't truly exist its a choice, and that i should focus on pleasing god. after watching andrew for less than 1 month my depression and anxiety that was on the level of needing medical assistance, i had to be pulled off a bridge once, and the other time i was going to jump out of the top story window of my college, it was all literally gone after a month. i realized the power in my life was in my own hands. i use to blame women for my problems but now i know that its all on me. and i have the responsibility to change not the world around me. the time that i waste being lazy could've been dedicated toward brilliance. and thats what i started doing, worked out more, became better for everyone around me, im the happiest and most productive I've ever been in my life, so i can tell you from personal experience as a man that everything he advocates for is 100% true, and its not just me hundreds of thousands/even millions of men will tell you the exact same story.

[king34]

then you have chicks like you (not all chicks if thats what you think) that are so scared because it means less simps for you. you dont want whats best for us if you did you wouldn't be trying to tare down the tates you would be supporting them, you watched maybe 2 or 3 clips of andrew tate and probably misinterpreted his sarcasm and your running around like the rest of these bots spewing tate hate out of pure ignorance, despite all the good he's done. you speak on things you know nothing about because you're an npc. you, and chicks like you just have too much ego, you can't put your pride aside and actually watch the guy, or be like you know what andrew tate is right, he makes a lot of sense, you have no will to understand much less support men or our growth or mental health so why not just mind your business then? you just sit and live your bot life. your the one that tate makes bitter and angry not men but thats only because you are programed to think he is a threat to you. he's a genuinely good, loving person (not saying he is perfect) that wants the best for everyone and he preaches the way he does because he wants to help people. and thats what he's done. He's a great man that millions look up to for good reason. you have to either have
factual evidence (there is none) to prove otherwise or you should stop trying to defame him out of spite, fear, anger, jealousy and close mindedness.

[sunflower00]

Andrew Tate does not care about you, the only thing he cares about is getting money. I’m glad you say you aren’t suffering anymore, but by the looks of your very long and angry response it seems to me as if you are.

Stop generalising women and me. You don’t know anything about me, so I don’t know why you are making all these false assumptions? I don’t have ‘simps’ running after me, I don’t want men chasing me, I’m in a very happy relationship - not that I owe any sort of explanation of who I am or my values to you.

I have watched A LOT of videos of Andrew Tate and almost nothing he says is helpful or nice in my opinion. He has said A LOT of misogynistic things and you know this so there is absolutely no reason for me to run through it all with you. I can literally see the effect he has had on you in the way you are generalising and demonising women ^. Please go outside and interact with real people! People are great!

I hope this guy gets the help he needs in the proper ways such as professional help so he doesn’t have to suffer or struggle any longer, and can feel confident in himself without having to me misogynistic

[king34]

My response wasn't angry, im just speak passionatey, always been this way, I'm not mad, and my response was long because i have a lot to say, by the way I never said I wasn't suffering anymore.

and my assumptions were rooted in the only logical conclusions I could draw from someone like you, you've made plenty of assumptions about me and about andrew tate except your assumptions make no sense. Your literally making tate into this boogie man in your head, i didn't demonize women I literally said "women LIKE YOU" I'm talking about a specific group of women and I didn't demonize them i just said that you don't have any will to understand men and you will choose your own self intrest over our health any day which you proved my case, I've just abundantly explained how and why tate is so important and helpful to men but instead of accepting that and saying "i didn't know" you still would rather me and men like me have had killed ourselves than listen to tate because he's not "nice" enough to women (in your ignorant opinion). That illustrates my point so beautifuly that i shouldn't even have to say anything else, you litteraly went out of your way to tate bash tate, so your either dont care about mens health, dont understand men at all, or your just an npc, wheres the demonization? Your calling me a misogynist just for wanting to be free of depression anxiety and suicidal tendencies so I can only assume you just don't understand, or you just do not care tell me I'm wrong? Professional help is bs it doesn't work, medication is just as bad, I'm telling you from experience and your basically like "well andrew isn't nice enough in my opinion so you the millions of men he's helping should just stay depressed" please explain how that doesn't prove my point about how women LIKE YOU (NOT ALL WOMEN ON EARTH) will choose their own self interest above a mens issues and health.

[king34]

the man has done nothing but help people, millions of people, sure he's not perfect and partially in it for the money, but he's genuinely trying to help men and by extension, everyone, and all you can do is try to tare him down because your sensitive to his sense of humor.
also i love how you complain about my assumptions while making a ton of assumptions about me you act like you knew me before i started listening to tate lol. trust me that version of me was worse in every way, you wouldn't want to meet him, this conversation would have went completely differently. tate has made me a better man in every way you can deny it all you want, just ignorance.
also another hypocritical thing on your part, your generalizing and demonizing me and all men who watch tate as mysoginist just for us wanting to live, and be the best version of ourselves. if you cared about men or our issues or health, you would say " i guess i missunderstood his message, i never new all the good he did for men." but instead of admiting you just dont understand his message that is tailored for men, your just gonna pretend you do understand and sit here and try to tare him down. im sorry i haven't been talking to you like a perfect pretty princess and you think im too mean despite not knowing me, it must be andrew tates fault i should just go back to standing on the edge of a bridge (sarcasm). your just disingenuous and you dont care about whats best for any man except your family probably.

just be honest and im basing this off of the FACT that you would rather me and a bunch of men die or live depressed lives, because of the demonization and generalization that you are making because andrew tate hurt your feelings by your own misinterpretation of his words.

[king34]

im not a jerk im a very nice person but i am argumentative and my tone through text comes off a bit aggressive I've always been like that, has nothing to do with the top g and even if it did it wouldn't mean im mysogynist nor would it justify your demonization of all men who follow the top g and mean we deserve to die. and i keep saying die because me and many men like me (note how i generalize men and myself aswell but when i say women "like you" its mIsOgYnIsT lol) would have died, at the time i found andrew tate i was planning it, i was writing my letter, and it was going to happen. like i said literally NO other form of help worked at all, including PROFESSIONALS and i am not the only one that was like this. so you are essentially saying you would rather me and others die based off your demonized view of men who like andrew. make it make sense

[king34]

@sunflower00 I can only hope that your silence means you have realized your hypocrisy and I hope that my words left you something to reflect apon and encouraged you to reconsider your biases and preconceived notions about andrew and his followers. And if that is the case thankyou for listening and caring and making an effort to understand us. Thankyou for accepting new information and being willing to change your views. I wish there were more people like you...

but my more pecemistic side believes that regardless of all the facts and even my deep personal experience I shared, it will all fall on deaf ears and you will retreat into the shell of cognitive dissonance while turning your head from the truth and continue to think the way you do, and continue to believe the hanouse accusations that you conjured up about men like me, against all logic. If that is what you choose to do then I feel bad for the men that your going to continue to hurt and bully. Like you've tried to do here. There are men everyday whose lives could be saved but they are too scared to turn to tate because they are afraid of being cut off, shamed or verbally abused, by feminist (not all women) that have darkness and malice in their heart, so these guys sit and endure it, continuing to live an awful life because they are scared, all just to please those people. And it breaks my heart as a man once in those shoes. But I hope that it's not the latter. I hope that at the very least you can accept that you misunderstand certain things about men and andrew.

[king34]

@sunflower00 In any case, I do apologize if that came off rude at any point but, it's a passionate issue that effects real people.

Also here's clip, of his most recent interview and then a video of after the interview, I had to send these because ironically he says exactly what I was trying to explain to you weeks ago and I along with other men can vouche for this with lived personal experience not to mention statistics. The man's not lying one bit.

www.instagram.com/.../?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

https://youtu.be/Lj-tOFTZDKQ