Why would teenage girls 16 and 17 not confront their father over cheating?

[Anonymous]

My question is, what could be some reasons a wife and teenage daughters never confront their cheating dad?

That's been cheating on mom for 7 years?

The wife has known for about 3 years and unfortunately the kids found out also.

Noone has confronted him, they just sent me a few nasty semi threatening messages on the girlfriend social.
The wife did say on social , one of her greatest accomplishments was keeping her mouth shut.

I can see reasons a wife wouldn't confront but not teenage girls.
Maybe mom turned them against him? But they still visit family together, the daughters are doing summer work in his new business etc

There is a business start up that will bring in serious money in 3 years. I don't know if that has anything to do with it. She's a SAHM 20 years.

Not sure if any of this is relevant but I can't put my finger on why even his kids don't say anything. From what I can tell they have anger towards

[DaveJord]

So my ex-wife cheated on me. I was solider who deployed to Iraq. My ex-wife moved another man into our house while I was gone. My 14-year-old daughter new this. She never told me until she was 24 and my wife and I was going through a divorce.

Why did she never tell me?

Because my ex-wife was a master manipulator, and emotional bully. I always thought it was just me she was doing this to. In my naiveness, I never once believed that any mother would abuse here own child in the same way she was abusing me. I was an adult, so I knew what was happening and I was about to protect myself and stand up for myself.

But my children were being subject to the same form of emotional abuse that was, if not in the same exact ways. They were scared of their mother, and whenever I tried to ask question, they would get really pissed off at me and it would turn toxic fast. This always upset me. I could never understand what was going on or why. But everyone walked around the house on eggshells... because nobody ever wanted to piss off mom.

My kids were raised in a house divided. I never realized it until it was too late, and even though as an adult managed to protect myself... I failed to protect my children from their own mother. Neither of my kids as adults will talk to their mother, and both struggle with emotional issues to this day... because they were not raised to respect their father, and they blame me for it.

I lived it and never truly realized WTF was going on in my own household. But I was in the military so I would often be gone for months out of the year. So the kids new, that I would have to leave and when I was gone, nobody would be there for them. So, they lived in fear of their mother, and they were taught not to trust their father.

[Asker]

Hmm the cheating dad has alcohol problems and the mom never confronted that either.
Plus she's a stay at home mom for 20 years so she depends on his money.
I have no doubt she told her kids she's staying for finances. This is abuse from both parents.
These kids will wind up like yours.
Like say something to your spouse and tell them to stop or else.

[slatyb]

That is almost never a good idea. Their mother already knows, so there's no point in telling her that they are also aware. Their mother and has decided to stay in the marriage, at least for now. She may be waiting until the girls finish high school.

[Asker]

Mom knows the girls know. From what I know, they discuss it.

[slatyb]

Sorry, I misread the question. What good would it do to confront their father?

[Asker]

Isn't it better than allowing him to cheat? Like, yes he continues to cheat freely because the why not, Noone is stopping him.

[Quackthulu2]

It’s not the responsibility of children to parent their parents.

[DaveJord]

Emotional abuse plain and simple... it's not the children responsibility but they are often the victims. More time than not the children are the only real and true victims.

[Quackthulu2]

@DaveJord You aren’t wrong. Shitty parents lead to fucked up kids.

[Anonymous]

That is an awkward to bring up, especially for teenagers.

[Iron_Man]

That’s mostly the wife’s responsibility to confront the husband face-to-face

[riverrat3]

That is between the parents