Who else feels that FWB’s is the best way to go?

[Finchie40]

Through my years and experiences with girls’ I realized that FWB’s is the best way to go , especially nowadays , because most people in general don’t really know what they want anymore , they think they do , but when push comes to shove they don’t , So why give your heart to someone completely if they eventually won’t be able to do the same? Everyone cheats whether they say they do or not , Cheating isn’t always physical , cheating occurs when you start hiding things from your partner , secretly talking to the opposite sex , neglecting your partner intimacy and affection , investing time into someone else over your partner is cheating , You can sugarcoat it all you want , but you are cheating period , People jump into relationships without looking at the big picture , because we our infatuated with that person, we don’t really focus on the negatives we focus on he positives of what they are giving us. But as time goes by that can magically change to the point you no longer have the same passion and desire for that person anymore , you start to see their true colors or their selfish traits to the point you no longer really matter to them. So you are left there with a broken heart , backstabbed or betrayed by loving someone that didn’t really love you back the same. For love to grow between 2 people you both have to be on the same page or it isn’t going to work , You both have to make each other your top priority or it isn’t going to work. FWB’s eliminates all of that nonsense giving you both time to really get to know each other and giving you both space to decide if you really want to spend the rest of your life with that person. FWB’s needs some strings attached but not 100 percent. Why I feel FWB’s is the best way to go

[chrissykerdock]

i have a friends with benefits and i give him blowjobs 3-5 times a week... so i get to stay active and not an old maid... it keeps me busy that's for sure... and i like the intimacy of giving him blowjobs... i like giving him blowjobs wearing a minidress... or a short robe... or nude... or bra and panties etc etc... it fills a void... and he made it known when he comes over i need to give him blowjobs... and he's loyal to me and doesn't cheat long as i promise to give him blowjobs... which is fine with me... but it does keep me from dating anyoe else because he keeps me busy and i don't want to disappoint him either.

[nothingtosee]

Wow, you're a GREAT friends with benefits! But, I must confess, if I was him, I would encourage you to have sex with other men, or women so we can have something naughty to talk about as we fucked.

[kylee2437]

No thanks. You are investing so much time into a situation that is going no where. If I wanted to give someone that much time, I would just get into a relationship

[Finchie40]

That’s the thing , you aren’t giving someone that much time , you are both slowly getting to know each other and to see if you both will make it for the long haul or short haul. Most people jump into relationships without looking at the big picture , because they plate infatuated with each other , but when time goes on things start to fade and the passion and desire for each other takes a turn for the worst leaving one partner’s heart crushed or broken. FWB’s eliminates that nonsense , Yes some strings need to be attached but not completely , you both our on the same page as things without the pressure of being on a committed relationship, The truth is most people in general our selfish people , we all think we know what we want but when we get it we might change our minds once we truly get to know the person we chose to commit to , Why so many relationships fail because most people only want what is best for them , they don’t consider their partners feelings

[kylee2437]

And I’ll 10000% agree with what you just said and you are right. I just don’t want to give into sex with someone I don’t see the bigger picture with, and giving someone sex is not only giving your most intimate aspect of you, it’s also still giving them your time.

[Finchie40]

That’s why some strings need to be attached , I am not just going to have sex with a girl for the hell of it , I have to feel some sort of connection and chemistry with her, cuz honestly I don’t want to end up with a girl that doesn’t think sex is important in a relationship, I know guys and girls look at sex differently but sex to most men is a way we express our feelings to her and want to be close to her. Most relationships sex isn’t even an issue in the beginning but as time goes on sadly that can fade and one of the main reasons it fades is because both partners didn’t look at the big picture , they were just infatuated with each other. Then all of a sudden one of you ends up cheating or falling out of love leaving the other person heart broken and shit on. FWB’s works if you both have the same intentions and want the same things once giving it time for the big picture to open up , if one of you decides you want to date someone else or interested in someone else you can be honest about it instead of feeling like you mislead your committed partner. FWB’s gives both of you that breathing room

[kylee2437]

The issue with this is in a lot of friends with benefits situation, 1 of the 2 people in the situation manipulates and doesn’t tell full truths because the other person isn’t on board or seems like they want something out of the situation so it becomes a problem over time because there’s no much feelings and honesty being hidden.

[Finchie40]

Well that’s why I say some strings need to be attached , I wouldn’t have a FWB’s with a girl if she is running around screwing a bunch of other guys just like I wouldn’t be screwing a bunch of other girls , we are just open to seeing other people , dating for the most part and having fun with our friends and not really being tied down like a committed relationship, I take relationships seriously , I am not going to commit myself to a girl that doesn’t really know what it means to be in a committed relationship , but my intentions is for her and I to go that direction , basically giving each other breathing room , if either one of us meets someone else or interested in someone else then her and I end the Benefits part and remain friends or we agree to be committed

[TheSpaceGnome]

I think its a really stupid way to go, casual sex in general is.

Not everyone cheats, and plenty of people know what they want in life, plus sex without commitment causes way too many problems, and if you can't trust a person enough to know they won't cheat, then why have sex with them?

The risks involved with sex is the main reason why cheating is so horrible. If you think everyone cheats, then just stay celibate, because if everyone does cheat, then you'll get stds and child support payments by having casual sex.

[Anonymous]

Sure, it can work if establish boundaries and don't cross them. The problem is that sooner or later, one of the people involved starts developing feelings and it messes things up.

[Finchie40]

My intentions is to eventually establish feelings with her without rushing into it until we really get to know each other , Most people think they know what they want but when they get it , they change their minds and realize they want something different once the big picture comes into play , So instead of having your heart shit on it’s easier to just remain friends and go your separate ways just in case one of you decides to hook up with someone else and invests your time into someone else The problem most relationships face is lack of trust and respect for each other , someone can tell you they love you with all their heart but when push comes to shove they love what they can receive from you , but they don’t know how to give back the same in return. FWB’s eliminates that to the point it gives both of you breathing room and time to really think about if you will both make it for the long haul or short haul , either way you are both on the same page about things. Me personally loves sex , I love sex with a girl that wants me the same , I can’t just bang a girl for the hell of it , So if I am having sex with a girl my intentions is to have her coming back for more and more , I don’t want her feeling forced what so ever , but if I am constantly being neglected intimacy and affection from her all of a sudden I am more than likely going to walk away anyways. When sex fades in a relationship , that is usually the red flag that the relationship is coming to an end , when a partner feels neglected or unwanted or unloved or they realize they really don’t have sexual chemistry like they did in the beginning that’s when relationships fall apart So we never really know what someone’s true intentions are , we can assume they want what we want , but sadly that isn’t always the case , so why give your heart completely to someone that can’t give you back the same? Being left with a knife in your heart for whatever reason? FWB’s eliminates all that nonsense.

[TheSpaceGnome]

When people say "rushing into things to fast" they mean having sex too fast, sex is the end of the dating journey, not the starting point.

[Finchie40]

Not necessarily, Nowadays people just have sex like it’s no big deal , so we never really know what someone’s true intentions are , most people lie and do what they have to do to get what they want, So FWB’s eliminates having your heart shit on if one of you decides you our interested in someone else , and we make the agreement just to remain friends if that occurs

[TheSpaceGnome]

Except that thats a really bad idea.

Better to have your heart shit on BEFORE your health gets shit on.

So think about this logically for a minute.

If a person cheats, the reason it is "shitting on your heart" is because they don't care about your safety/health/benefit.

Cheating introduces other sexual partners into the mix, it removes loyalty and commitment too, and that makes everything worse for your safety and positive outcomes for you in general (like not ending up alone).

friends with benefits basically starts out in the bad position, so what you're reallly saying is:
"to avoid eventually catching stds, having kids from an ex, and ending up single, just do all 3 of those things much sooner"

Its dumb af 😂

[nothingtosee]

I love having a friends with benefits. I like it because we use each other for sex. I have found the communication is much more open and honest. Plus, she will ask for things (sexually) that she might not ask of her boyfriend because it might offend him. For example, maybe she wants to have a threesome with 2 guys. Hey, I'm open to that! Or, maybe she wants to explore having sex with a woman. Or, maybe she has a fantasy that most men would consider too kinky. I'm open to all of that!

My last friends with benefits was interesting. When we would have sex, her boyfriend would call almost every time. And when she picked up, I would do things like, stop what I was doing and eat her out softly and slowly, just to drive her crazy, or stroke her pussy softly and slowly just to see if she could maintain a conversation with him. It always made for some interesting conversations after she hung up with him.

[EricSummer]

For me it would not be a good choice. I get attached quickly. That's why I will not participate in a game in which you lose when you fall in love.

My only hope in this situation would be that the woman falls in love as well. In fact, women often do as long as their brain is sufficiently soaked in the right mix of hormones. However, if this works out it is no friends with benefits anymore, either.

[DermalPunch]

women often do as long as their brain is sufficiently soaked in the right mix of hormones.

Emotional women who lack logic, yes.

[Ms_Facesitter]

It's a great if you have set clear boundaries and expectations and both parties understand and can meet those expectations.

But if one gets jealous because you're seeing other people, or catches feelings for the other, it's over.

[nothingtosee]

I agree with you. I've found that the communication with each other was much more open and honest. I especially love it because she can ask "favors" of me (sexually) that she might not want to ask a boyfriend. She knows I won't be offended or grossed out by any requests.

[DermalPunch]

I think it is a degrading and trauma-inducing setup for all those involved.

[Anonymous]

No. If it comes to that I'd just rather remain single. Honestly if sex was all was in it for a prostitute is a lot cheaper and a whole lot less hassle.

[OhLongJohnsoning]

if you wanna be a sad pathetic loner the rest of your life

[justabuddy]

The issue is not everyone can do it without catching feelings.

[Finchie40]

The purpose of it is to catch feelings without rushing into a commitment, , Most people rush into commitment and then they realize oh wait this isn’t the person I want to be with , it gives both of you breathing room to really get
To know each other instead of just assuming everything is fine , most people do not
Look at the big picture when meeting someone new they are just infatuated with each other , once infatuation period is over then that’s where most relationships fall apart , FWB’s eliminates that , it gives both of you time to really consider if you both want a commitment or go your separate ways and remain friends

[Anonymous]

Not me.