What are your red flags while on a date?

Question

FunkyMonkee · Accepted Answer

I took a girl out on a date about 9 years ago and we went out for a pizza. Not just some run-down dive, this is high-end pizza!! This one shop has been in business on the exact same spot since the `50's!! People in California order 20 or 30 pizzas at a time and have them flown via FedEx all the way across the country!! Their small is almost as big as anybody else's large!!
So, she and I are sitting at one of the many tables there eating our pizza, talking and having a fairly nice time together. She's sitting directly across the table from me and in the middle of the meal, she lets out this fairly loud burp!! Except for this old Italian lady that used to live next door in the mid `70's, I've never heard a woman burp before!! A few minutes later, she took another bite and there was this 6 or 8 inch long strand of onion hanging out of the side of her mouth!! Rather than try to bite it off, pull it out or suck it in, she left it waving in the breeze as she continued to talk! What's she gonna do next, start biting her toenails? Scratching her asshole and smelling it her fingers?

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Accepted Answer

Checking phone / texting to friends

Anemone978 · Accepted Answer

Being ignored bothers me the most.. I wouldn't see them again if that happened anytime in the date.. but they are all read flags I wouldn't want to see..
This is why I will never date again even if I divorce, I hate people, I rather be a cat lady..

Pinay_ako · Accepted Answer

Attitude towards the server and phone etiquette

razelove · Answer

Checking phone and being ignored. I mean, the only point of going on a date is to get to know each other. The other ones can come up, be not so great, acceptable, unacceptable, whatever, but it's still part of getting to know each other.

If I'm taking my time to get to know them, or even with someone I'm with, or have been with go out on a date to spend time together and they're texting and tuning me out, that shit isn't flying.

That's when they can pay, and I can walk.

Avicenna · Answer

All of the above. Listening poorly, being disinterested and self-centered.

Paris13 · Answer

Other Like: All of the Above PLus Telling you They Love you. xxoo

AviatorTom · Answer

Bring ignored is bad, in particular if she pays more attention to other guys than to me.

kespethdude · Answer

I'll sum up each of the options:
1. Bad Manners: This is subjective, and one who insists on good manners is likely to be a control freak anyway. That type of relationship is toxic when one can't be themselves so I didn't pick that one.
2. Rudeness (like farting or burping): Only a prude on an incel would be immature enough to pick this option.
3. Checking phone: Depends on how often. If to see what time it is, or if the individual is known to be on the clock or on call, it is expected. If the person is checking the time because they are bored, it's not working out. But this isn't the one I chose either.
4. Being ignored: This is the one I chose. If someone is not listening to you, and this includes ghosting (without good reason), cherry picking and other toxic things narcissists do, you're not in a relationship in the first place. Only choice here is to move on.

loveslongnails · Answer

Pretty much all of the above, except that burping can done, if necessary, without it being gross. There ARE acceptable reasons for leaving a phone on during a date:
* if you're on call, i. e. doctor, nurse, health care worker, EMT, or your job requires it
(if any of these are the case the case, the person you're dating should know in advance)
* if you're a single parent and there's a sitter, and an emergency arises
* if you're a caregiver for a elder parent

If these don't apply and your phone is on, it's a back door for a rescue call and it's bullshit.

marrk · Answer

I hate it when someone checks their phone unless they tell me they have a good reason. I’m a millennial! It makes me feel unimportant.

i also went on a date one time and this guy coughed to his right…I think he was attempting to cough into his shoulder, but couldn’t. So, bad hygiene/manners…whatever you want to call that. I work with kids and if they have better manners than you…thank you, next.

Reem12345reem · Answer

I don't think farting/burping is rude , it's literally a reflex action u can't control unless u feel it before it comes but most people are distracted while talking or doing something else they can't know when they'll burp :) just don't be close to me when u do it

Andres77 · Answer

Being late, caked on makeup, dressed inappropriately, rude to the servers, complains about everything, on her phone constantly…. granted, I never would have waited so long. If she was doing all of these I would have left as soon as she was rude the first time.

AnusNdaPainus · Answer

Too people today have horrible manners

I just get frustrated with people who have awful communication skills in general

do you realize how much of life’s problems would be solved if we took the time to learn how to talk to people and treat people with basic human decency

Make eye contact and acknowledge people, ask them how they are doing , practice introducing yourself instead of just asking people for their names

Johnny4473 · Answer

Attitude towards the servers and pretty much anyone who is serving you as part of their jobs. That means security guards, shopkeepers.

I might sound like a hobo, but love and kindness is the key to life mates. And why be rude to someone without a reason.

mandyfire98 · Answer

All of these. Bad hygiene. Bad presentation of themselves, so being a slob. Being narcissistic, anything misogynistic. Messing with their phone too much.

strateguy632 · Answer

other, because none of these are IMPORTANT instead get used to EACH of them. instead insults are red flag and name calling, including racist and phobe-s show they do personal attack. say bye bye then straight away.

rosemilk · Answer

i'm sorry but i canNOT stand when people burp. it's the most disgusting, rudest, disrespectful thing you can do around a date.

as for the being ignored, checking phone, which are both bad manners, just end the date there.

CuriousMufuxka · Answer

Checking the goddamn phone! That counts as ignoring, bad manners, and completely rude. If I had the power and ability to resurrect Steve Jobs in the late 90's I'd show the aftermath of some bitch distracted. Which I'd probably be escorted out and time would not be affected..

catiecatie · Answer

I mean most of these are red flags. Now if it was like hey I’m expecting some news from my family so I need to have my phone on then I’d understand. But not saying anything and being mean and no manners and shit like that I draw the line.

CubsterShura · Answer

Honestly, all of the above. The way he treats the servers, the way he treats me, how much he uses his phone. They all matter so much.

Yannishka · Answer

If he is still thinking about his crush who moved countries, but that guy is still torn thinking about her. Based on a question I answered here earlier.

NathanDavis · Answer

being rude with the staff...  BIG NO

thatshydork · Answer

I hate people being rude (both to me and to others around me) and being ignored. Checking your phone is fine just as long as it’s not like every few minutes.

Wonderingguyy · Answer

Being on her phone too much, treating waiters or other people in public badly,  getting drunk on the first date, if she can’t have a laugh/keep conversation.

Lyndsielee666 · Answer

Talking over me when I’m talking really pisses me off ngl

Rei13 · Answer

I picked bad manners since encompasses all the options listed and then some lol. Bad hygiene would also be on the list

qwert1234 · Answer

Constantly on the phone. Not contributing to conversation. How they deal with other people - barista, waiter, chef, front desk, cashier etc.

molonski2 · Answer

By other Im saying " All of the above " , I despise all those things and I'd be really pissed off.

Drewtate · Answer

If she's rude to service staff that's an indication of how the relationship will be between you both long term.

electromagnetic · Answer

Definitely bad manners.  no eating etiquette, rude to the service employees.

nastyb · Answer

Red flags dont show up on first date. It usually comes out months or years into the relationship

chrissykerdock · Answer

i think farting can be horrid... if he's farting it's like he has no respect for you.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Just holding a phone when arriving for a date is enough to turn me off.

ArrowheadSW · Answer

Rudeness to people in public, such as being rude to waitresses in restaurants.

PizzaDaddyo · Answer

Stop staring at ur phone my man boobs are right here!

Archferret · Answer

1. Being ignored  2. Rudeness 3. Bad manners 4. Checking phone Red flags order wise

BadApple69 · Answer

I picked other… because you didn’t have a button marked “all of the above”

Quidthonian · Answer

Smoking: Instant red card, Checking her phone: She is not too interested in me, Being arrogant overly rude (without justification) to service people.

LogicBomber · Answer

Expecting the guy to pay.  Talking like a trashy ratchet.  checking her phone.  acting entitled.  saying any feminist/woke garbage.

WhitneySnow · Answer

All of those I guess but checking your phone is the worst

Bricealan · Answer

Any or all of those would be a deal breaker for me on a first date.

Reorx · Answer

All of the above. Also leaving me confused or playing games, leaves me apathetic, I'll walk out on a date if they display any of these bad behaviours.

siseñor · Answer

rudeness/impatience towards strangers generally means they're a trashy dickhead

Jennz6 · Answer

I don’t like being ignored like giving a guy a BJ while he is on the phone 📞

humanearth · Answer

Didn't leave cellphone in the car or at home Always on the cellphone

tfan1 · Answer

I put down other because that option should be All of the above

DJB72 · Answer

Bad manners. Especially towards the restaurant staff

douride2 · Answer

My biggest complaint is guys always checking or using their phone

LiamJHayden · Answer

I see all of those options as various types of rudeness. To me the biggest red flag is being rude towards a server.

Shiningtempest · Answer

@lemiaofthunder My dating red flags are getting my name wrong, no shared interest, no shared music genres, tardy, flirts, white lies, & a woman who banters or harmless teasing

FinalFantasyBro · Answer

Treating me and everyone else like absolute garbage, I ain't into mean girls.

girlboss · Answer

Talks only about himself, doesn't pay the bill nor offer, no manners, being on their phone too much, rude to me or others around me, speaks poorly of others... etc

GᴇᴄᴇɴɪɴHᴜᴋᴜᴍᴅᴀʀı · Answer

Hello,  It bothers me that he is in a cynical manner, always talking about his job, his money, constantly playing with his cell phone, and having an arrogant attitude.

Wise4myage · Answer

Checking her phone constantly. That would really annoy me.

the_sinner · Answer

Being self centered, spending bare minimum amounts, being judgmental, greedy, putting on a fake face.

SonyaLB · Answer

He does not pay attention to me, like checking his phone.

imfreeze95 · Answer

Attitude to anyone they come in contact with if they just have a bad attitude it’s a huge turn off

ItsMykolaJenkins · Answer

Sense of humour different to mine Arrogance

BatsinCaves9 · Answer

Oversharing how much self love he’s got for himself. Sides with modern women. Effeminate rather so. Red flags to me

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

Again, none of these are red flags. They are things that make you feel less attracted. Please stop misusing the term red flag.

SpaceGalaxy · Answer

If he burps or farts while we are out on a date

NewHopeGir33 · Answer

Combined of all these

Katie1964 · Answer

All the above.

What are your red flags while on a date?

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