New relationship guilty, the truth?

There was so much wrong in my relationship with my ex, although there had once been so much love between the both of us for over a decade, over time my expectations for him to move in with me and get married to me had become the toxic seed in our relationship. We had both lost respect for each other over the years of being unable to get over past hurts and let downs. quite a bit of dishonesty, blame, insults, "breaks", a few moments of verbal & physical abuse. It wasn't love anymore.

I've recently started a new relationship with this great guy I met on bumble. He's a couple months younger than me but I just felt he was the protector provider type when I met him and as I spent time with (3 ms 2ms dating 1m as boyfriend/girlfriend) him that is the energy he's given me.
I want marriage, but to a stable man who has their life together, new boyfriend has a good stable job which he's been working for more than 7yrs in home tech installation. I feel guilt when I am with him because I lied about it being 2yrs since I left my ex but in fact it had only been 1m. Also because he's so nice to me and willing to get to the marriage part and he talks about wanting to do all the things I practically begged my ex to progress into with me. Now I have a man who wants to do that with me I have all these feelings of not deserving it because of the way I behaved towards my ex in my previous relationship. Anyone been through something like this? How did you get over it or how did you motivate yourself to act out of love in the new relationship not fear of loosing the new person?
Updates
7 mo
Told new boyfriend the truth about how long it has been now, he took it well and told me his feelings for me has not changed. I feel anxious and a little guilty still but much better that I've come clean and told him about it I can start a relationship on a lie.
Updates
7 mo
Can't * I can't start it on a lie is what I wanted to say
New relationship guilty, the truth?
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