I haven’t cheated on you yet?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I have been arguing a lot for a while. I have a fear of him cheating on my because of past experiences before him. This is how our recent conversation went: Him: "Don't you think I would've cheated on you already?" I'm in a crummy relationship and isn't that what people in bad relationship's do? They cheat" Me: The right thing to do is break up with me before you cheat Him: Yes, a bad person would cheat on you. I’m a good person and would not do that. I haven't cheated on you yet I felt a little weird that he said “yet.” I asked him what he meant and he said he mis spoke and didn’t mean he’ll cheat on me in the future. He said that I take everything too literally and that he meant “yet” from our conversation about him not cheating, in that he hasn’t done that yet despite because in a crummy relationship. My question is, does what he said make sense. Is it something I should take his word for? Could there any other meaning to it (about him saying “yet”)

[Anonymous]

You are making too many assumptions. You assume he’s going to cheat because of your own past experiences. You assume that because he said “yet” that he is planning to cheat. You assume that people in bad relationships will always cheat. That’s not true. As common as cheating is, it’s not the norm.

You’re having these arguments because you are struggling to trust your boyfriend. It’s not your fault those other men cheated, but you are making it your boyfriend’s problem when he had nothing to do with it.

[HollyK21]

It is never ever fair to make an entirely different man pay for what someone else did, that should be unacceptable in your mind. If you haven’t resolved that trauma and can’t be in a relationship without worrying he will cheat, pointing the finger and raising arguments then get out of that before he leaves you first. This is so toxic of you.

[RavVid]

It was an argument. 'Yet' is saying don't push me bitch and objecting to whatever you were saying.

Your fear of him cheating is having a very negative effect and he is getting jack of it. The later is your greatest risk rather than him putting his penis inside another woman cause that takes two.

On the other hand appreciating women who are just every day nice to him just takes him and it is only his decision to want more of it.

[spartan55]

God, you sound like a royal pain in the ass. You are wrong to punish him for however some old asshole boyfriend treated you. You shouldn't be in a relationship if that's how you act. I'd try to knock it off if I were you. He won't put up with it long.

[BoopBoopBeep]

God you sound exhausting. There's nothing that's a bigger turn off than an overthinker who wants to overanalyze every syllable in a conversation. That he hasn't cheated on you yet shows he's a good man.

[IslaTheWitch]

You feel insecure because of your past and try to move it on him.

It's not his responsibility to fight your past.

[Gent207-2]

You've been betrayed and hurt by more than one person and not you carry those defenses into every relationship.

Therapy can help you greatly

[Surely]

He probably meant to say. That if your relationship keeps going in the direction that it is going. He will be soon looking elsewhere for a partner.

[Anonymous]

He said that he's a good person and wouldn't cheat on you. That wasn't good enough for you so he was racking his brain trying to think of what else to say and mis spoke in the process.

[Luckycharms12]

You going to make him cheat or leave with your behaviour.

[HouseMoat]

Live for the moment, not for the future