After he finished talking about school, he said the other thing that was making him depressed was our relationship. He feels like he’s keeping me hostage. He says he doesn’t deserve the care and the affection and the attention that I give him. So he told me last night it is up to me as to whether or not I want to continue seeing him or if I wanna break it off. Between you and I I don’t wanna break up with him granite after hearing about all of the stuff he struggles with I want to be there for him. He’s already told me if we were to break up we could still be friends and I get that but I don’t want to be friends. I know myself enough and I’ve been in enough relationships to know when I’m in love with somebody and I’m not saying that I’m in love with him because I’m not but the way that I feel about him is completely different from anybody else I’ve ever dated. We both told each other that February is typically the month that we get our depression, the most and it hits us the hardest but again I’m willing to be there for him and work through this with him if he’s willing to do the same with me. He says the romantic chemistry isn’t there in between you and I again I think it’s not there because he’s so engulfed in his depression right now. We both admitted that we were falling in love before our depression hit. I know I might sound delusional and if I do sound delusional, please let me know but again, I know enough to know that sometimes when you’re blinded by one emotion, you kinda just tone out everything else.
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