Being in a controlling relationship can really take a toll on you—emotionally, mentally, and sometimes even physically. It's like walking on eggshells all the time, where the room for your personal freedom and happiness keeps shrinking. Here are some signs that might indicate you're in a controlling relationship:
Constant Monitoring: If your partner always needs to know where you are, who you're with, and what you're doing to an excessive degree, that's a red flag.
Isolation: A controlling partner might try to cut you off from your support network. The goal? To make you more dependent on them.
Gaslighting: This is a manipulative tactic where your partner makes you doubt your own feelings, memories, or sanity. If you're often left feeling like you're overreacting or being too sensitive when you express concerns, that's a problem.
Criticism and Degradation: Constant criticism, whether it's about your appearance, your intelligence, or your worth as a person, is a tool of control.
Financial Control: If your partner controls all the money, including your own, or scrutinizes your spending to an unreasonable degree, that's a form of control.
Jealousy and Paranoia: A little jealousy is normal in relationships, but if it's excessive, to the point where your partner gets angry when you talk to or even casually interact with others, that's a sign of control.
Making All the Decisions: If your partner decides everything from where you go out to eat, what you wear, or even bigger life decisions without your input, that's not a partnership; it's control.
Threats or Ultimatums: Using threats, whether it's threatening to leave, to hurt themselves, or even you, as a way to manipulate your actions is a clear sign of a controlling relationship.
Constant Apologies: Find yourself always apologizing, even when you're not sure what you did wrong? That's a tactic to keep you off balance and always in the wrong.
Feeling Trapped: If the thought of your relationship makes you feel trapped, scared, or hopeless, listen to that feeling.
Being in a controlling relationship can be incredibly damaging over time, and it's often a gradual process that gets worse.
Most Helpful Opinions
You can’t talk to everyone. Limit your contact with your family, which friends you can talk to, which people we hanging out with, etc.
When it comes to power, any sort of power imbalance needs to be consensual.
Some relationships thrive with a designated leader.
But, if that arrangement was never agreed upon, then the “leader” isn’t leading but rather bossing their partner around.
And nobody likes that.
Some people go into relationships and want control, but instead of talking about it, they use pressure and manipulation to overextend their power.
That’s the unethical and potentially abusive approach to go about it.
If your partner is asserting their control over your life or your relationship, and you never agreed to give them that level of control, then they are being controlling.
And even if you did agree to give them that control in the past — if the way things have been are unfulfilling to you and your needs aren’t being met, you absolutely have the right to renegotiate and reestablish your boundaries.
A controlling relationship is characterized by one partner dominating or manipulating the other. Its when ones behaviour becomes more controlling for instance knowing where you were, demanding to check through your phone etc. Other aspects can be criticising you for instance your choice of clothes or whom your friends are. They also make decisions for the both of you and dismisses your opinion as irrelevant or silly. If you try to discuss with them, they become defensive and accuses you for not being committed to the relationship.
If you see any of such signs you should think twice about them. No matter how much a person ask for forgiveness and promises to change, they can't do it on their own without the help of professional therapy and counselling.
What Girls & Guys Said
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5Opinion
If you feel like you are doing things just to make him happy and you only feel relieved if he doesn't get mad, he might be controlling you
jealousy
always needing to know where you are and whom you're with
anger issues
blames you for his shortcomings and failures
doesn't like your family or friends
family and friends warn you of himBeing controlling in a relationship (not to be confused with being protective) is a sign that the couple is incompatible.
when they always decide in ur place
force their opinion on uIf your s/o spends an inordinate amount of time watching Lifetime Movie Network premiers to perfect their obsessive, controlling, stalker techniques.☝️
Being told your controlling so you don't think you're being controlled.
When he or she dares to tell you what you can and can not do.
You are being controlled
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