My friend has been having some arguments with his girlfriend of three months. Before he got with her, he used to tell me everything! But once they started dating, I backed off a bit and gave them some space. I saw him today and within a few minutes, he began telling me about the fights they've been having, what he can't stand about her, "what if we break up", he can't stand her friend, etc. He also never referred to her as his "girlfriend" only the first time when I asked about her. I just listened to him vent and rant, but was kinda confused because I thoughts guys didn't talk about their relationship issues with other girls? He asked about my dating life and I told him about this dude that my friend is trying to set me up with. When I showed him this guys social media he got really mad saying this guy is a walking red flag, called him gross, saying my friend isn't really my friend. When I said I had to get going, he said things like "I miss our conversations" "I wish you could stay and talk to me longer" etc. But when I suggested coffee he declined, saying he is too busy. I even said he could bring his girlfriend and he said, "We'll see."
Now that l've typed all that out, I guess my question is whether or not this is normal for a guy in a relationship?
Like him telling me after his girlfriend's and his problems for example?
Now that l've typed all that out, I guess my question is whether or not this is normal for a guy in a relationship?
Like him telling me after his girlfriend's and his problems for example?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
That situation definitely seems off to me. A couple things stick out:
- It's weird that he's venting so much about fights with his girl to you specifically. Like yeah guys will vent, but usually to other guy friends, not other girls.
- The fact that he never calls her his "girlfriend" is a red flag. Like if he's not even officially calling her that, it shows he's probably not that into it.
- Getting really upset about you talking to other guys is another red flag. That's possessive behavior.
- Saying he misses talking to you and wanting you to stay longer... major red flag there. Definitely seems like there's still some lingering feelings on his part if he's saying stuff like that.
- Blowing off your suggestion to hang out but "maybe" bringing the girlfriend along just reeks of not actually wanting her there.
I'd keep my distance from this guy if I was you. He clearly isn't fully committed to this relationship and it kinda seems like he may be trying to mess around emotionally with you still. I wouldn't feel comfortable with a friend dumping relationship drama on me like that, ESPECIALLY behind their partner's back. You seem like you've got your head on straight - don't get played by some dude who can't get over you! Hope this helps give you a guy's perspective on the shadiness.
time to keep some dance from him
Immaturity. Not fun.