When she asks about my day/work, I cut it very short and when she asks for more information about my work I get irritated. My work is not secret or something I think the case is I think a lot in my head about work and I get very lazy to explain later on. She gets upset by that.. How can I solve this?
take some time to recharge, then share how you felt during the day, what you experienced and slowly add more.
"I worked on an Audi Q2... the wrenches were so cold today, so got smart and got some gloves. My hand was like ice. The nuts were difficult to crack.. those basta! ds... I had to get a torch and take a few off, I was so excited getting that nut off... took 1/2 hr. ..." etc.. Add in parts about customers to help her feel more secure. she wants to be "in your world" and know what is going on. It will feel good to her. If it feels bad to you, then you've got some work to do.
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You get irritated by the question when get asked and you already know this question will be coming from her. So before she asked you yourself tell her about it, however you would like to say. In details or in short. Like this you won't feel irritated as this question has not came before you.
Or you can also say like, my day was bad today also I'm completely exhausted. Please don't ask me in details now about it I'm not in state of mind to answer. Like this you would feel better also that you have shared about your stressful day with someone, you informed her also about your boundary and you avoided question also to come before you.
It’s perfectly okay to say to her, “I’m still processing my work day. My day was good/bad/fine, but I’m going to need some time before I can go into details.”
I’ve used something like this before. “I don’t particularly like how my day went and all day long I looked forward to getting to a place where I felt appreciated/safe/important/relaxed/etc. and that’s here with you. Now that I’m here I’m
feeling so much better.
If it’s okay I’d really rather be in this good moment than reliving the moments today I didn’t really enjoy. If you want any specific details I’m happy to answer questions because I’m always open and honest with you but I don’t feel like telling the stories of the day.”
Works well, in my experience.
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Aiming to sprinkle a bit of love advice here! It sounds like you might be in a bit of a pickle, but no worries, many have been there, and there's always a way to smooth things over. First, communication is key - and it sounds cliché because it works. Take a moment, when you're feeling relaxed and not bogged down by the day, to share with your partner that you're aware of your behavior and you're not thrilled about it either. Let her know it's not about the secrecy but potentially about how exhausted or overwhelmed you might feel about work.
Next up, let's make it fun, shall we? How about creating a little "work digest" for your partner? Maybe over dinner, you can share one high, one low, and one funny or intriguing thing that happened at work. It keeps the convo light and engaging, and who knows, you might find yourself looking forward to these little shares. The effort you put into opening up will surely be appreciated, and it could even become a beautiful little ritual that enhances your connection. Remember, turning a "ugh" moment into an "aha" moment in relationships is always a win! 😉
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Just answer her questions honestly... and simply. Don't give any more detail than wht the question calls for.
For example, if she asks, "Do you go to lunch?" you just say "Yes", you don't say, "Yes, my colleagues and I go to the cafeteria from noon to 1pm, eat our lunch and then play cards."
Giving too much information is often worse than not giving enough.
I can understand this , there are times when I feel like I never wanted to be asked how “work” was but the more I looked within myself I realized it was because I actually wanted and needed to connected on a deeper emotional level and my frustration was really that in comparison to the things I thought I needed to talk about “work” was arbitrary and trivial.
Also usually it comes from a good place when your being asked that and if it’s just that you have had an off day or not much to tell then it’s ok to say that too. Either way , let her inYou might not be able to. If talking about your work annoys or frustrates you, tell her as much. Then kindly change the subject. Choose something on which she can carry part of the conversation rather than interrogating you about something on which she can’t speak intelligently from experience. This way you can continue to engage with her and you aren’t getting stressed out about it.
Also, count your blessings. My experience strongly suggests most women just want to talk about themselves. If she’s genuinely interested in you enough to continue engaging despite your frustrations, she might be a keeper!It just takes conscious effort to take the time to give her a thoughtful answer. There may be times you just don’t want to talk about work and I think that’s fine, but understanding that her question is coming from a genuine interest in you should make it worthwhile to give her a meaningful answer.
Realistically, everyone tries to share without oversharing. Are you actively hiding something from your partner that he/she should know about? If so, just be direct and come clean.
I think it’s simple. Sit her down and just explain that after a long hard day of work the last thing you want to do is to relive it. That’s not hard to understand.
Don't. Long as you are doing your duties at home work is work. All she needs to know is if it went good or bad. If she is trying to supportive that should be sufficient information.
The wants the workplace gossip. Just try to take note of the hilights of the day and tell her about it.
Tell her the truth. When you get home from work, you've had enough, and the last thing you need to do is talk about it.
Just be honest. Be interested or pretend to be excited to come home to her and answer her questions... Put in a little effort
If the information you’re holding is gonna make problems in your relationship listen to me don’t say a fucking word.
Sounds like you a typical guy with communication issues.
Just be honest to her.
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