Girls, what will you do if your boyfriend says he likes his girlfriend to be on the chubbier side but you're on the slim side?

Question

So I am 33-24-33 , height 5"5 , weighing 45-46kgs, I have always been on the slim side, and I struggle gaining weight. It's a huge task for me to gain weight and extremely easy to lose weight. Anyway so my boyfriend of 6 months since the beginning of our relationship used to ask me to have more food and to gain some fat while I really didn't think a lot of it , we had a conversation last night where he told me that he prefers chubbier girls over slim girls, so this caught me off guard as I really didn't know that he had such a preference. And no guy has ever said something like this to me. I'm worried whether if he actually finds me attractive or not, because I definitely don't fall under his "preference" . Even if I have to change my physique to be on the chubbier side , I may have to gain at least 7 to 8 kgs which is extremely difficult for me, how can I deal with this situation?

Flatmanlewis · Accepted Answer

Okay. This dude needs a talking to and I wish I could grab his ear and sit him down. Since that can’t happen I’ll tell you this:

He’s kind of a jerk.

This is not a simple preference situation. It’s selfish. What’s the difference?

Preference is asking you to wear a certain style of dress, or outfit, or makeup, or even hair color. It’s if you ask him for his input into a change YOU are going to make and he gets to have an opinion.

This is not preference. It’s control and manipulation. He KNEW what he was getting and went out with you and now he’s seeing if he can manipulate you into being what he wants. The motive is the real question to me.

If he prefers chubbier girls then why did he date you? Is he trying to make you less attractive perhaps to somehow ease his own insecurities that you could leave him? Is he crushing on some other girl and trying to move you closer to her appearance?

Most importantly - if you are thin framed then understand weight gain only comes from two places: working out and gaining muscle (which is ideal but hard work) and increasing your caloric intake and putting on body fat (never a good thing). So essentially he’s asking you to radically change your life to a lifestyle of fitness and if he is then he better be doing the same thing OR he’s asking you to make unhealthy choices and decrease your overall health for his visual pleasure.

Either way it’s not a small ask.

ThaMaskedMarvel · Accepted Answer

Simply break-up with him. You'll never feel comfortable/good enough/pleasing to his eye while being lighter around him. If you do manage to gain the weight, you'll look back & ask yourself why you even did all of this. Especially since most relationships end in break-ups anyway. You'll have that post relationship clarity. Picture yourself, years from now, telling the sob story to everyone about how you put on weight for your ex & the relationship still ended & now here you are with extra weight, no man, depressed & other men aren't finding you attractive at all because you've gained the weight for your ex. Have the foresight to see what's really going to happen here. Simply break up with him. It's the only logical way to go.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

Imagine being caught in a love story where your partner prefers a different genre! 😅 It's like wanting a romantic comedy while they're all about the drama. Your boyfriend dropping the 'chubbier preference' bomb might feel a bit like a plot twist you didn't see coming. The thing is, love isn't about molding ourselves into a character we think our partner will love more. It's about celebrating the unique stories we each bring to the table.

Now, onto the spicy part: communication is key, my dear! Share your feelings with him, let him know the pressures and concerns his preferences bring into your world. It's essential to understand if this is a mere preference or a deal-breaker for him (big difference!). Remember, it's not about changing your 'genre' but rather understanding if both of your stories can create a bestseller together.

At the end of the day, being in love with someone should make you feel like the best version of yourself, not push you into rewrites you're not comfortable with. Let's aim for a relationship where being yourself is enough. After all, isn't love the ultimate adventure where everyone deserves to feel like the hero of their story? Keep shining, and don't let anyone dim that sparkle! 🌟

V_Injector · Answer

First thing you need to learn about us guys... we want what we don't have. I was with little titts and wanted big titts, now with big titts and I would love some little titts. That's extremely simplistic but is describes what I'm talking about it. This is the result of restricted fucking.

I was given the option of buying a real doll.

Girls, what will you do if your boyfriend says he likes his girlfriend to be on the chubbier side but you're on the slim side?

And I found that I wanted different kinds, more than one type, different races, and shapes. Basically your dude has been banging you, he just wants to bang something different. Doesn't mean he likes you less or something like that... but you're just one woman.

Jessica405 · Answer

Tell him to accept you are or go take a hike!

JacobJordan · Answer

I know it is for the ladies but best response "suck it up buttercup if you want a fatter girl we can end the relationship but I am not going to sacrifice my physical health because you like girls with lower self confidence"

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

You've got it all wrong. If he dated you in the first place at this weight, it means you ARE his preference! If he expects there to be a change, its up to him to change his preferences, not you..

DishLady · Answer

Nothing. I respect and appreciate myself enough to know that I look fine. The guy has no impact on whether I look nice as I am; I know when I look and feel good.

NamerOfStars · Answer

Let him know you can't really do that, and see how he reacts; if it's a dealbreaker for him, that'll be the end of things, but he wouldn't be with you in the first place if he wasn't attracted to you.

CrabCakes11 · Answer

I’m not going to sacrifice my health to be more attractive to my partner. I wouldn’t gain wait to appease him

PeachyPie93 · Answer

Never change for a boyfriend, tell him if he doesn't like your body type move on, there are plenty more fish in the sea.

sheikalana · Answer

I wouldn't do anything. I'm not putting on weight because of anyone. Plus my job requires me to have a certain weight and look a certain way.

EmmaMary · Answer

Yet another "Asker" with no manners or common courtesy to make any replies. smh

Peridot25 · Answer

Ask him why he chose you instead of someone chubbier in the beginning.

Anonymous · Answer

He has chosen very unwisely. You can't change people.

Hellur991 · Answer

Make us feel special sis.. do what u can to please us. But again it's your decision., and ur body.

DrPepper12 · Answer

I wouldn't ask that of anyone.

shortster · Answer

Find a guy that likes skinny women

Whitedog1 · Answer

You are so fortunate being on the very thin side.

dustybiker2 · Answer

He's out of luck.

Anonymous · Answer

Is really anyone gonna say that?

war_daddy · Answer

date someone else

Girls, what will you do if your boyfriend says he likes his girlfriend to be on the chubbier side but you're on the slim side?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

AI Opinion

What Girls & Guys Said

Guys do you mind if your girlfriend gets a little chubby?