Is it normal to stop caring about my parents cheating on each other?

[Anonymous]

I just turned 25 last week and it's been nothing but drama, watching them arguing growing up. One day my father wanted me (then 11) to say nothing about his affair. During my mid teens, my mom wanted me to also keep quiet about her cheating and even bought me some clothes, took me to eat ice-cream and gave me some money to buy my silence. Even if dad would've found out I was somewhat of an accomplice to mom, he would've been a hypocrite to get upset since he did the same in getting me involved in his affair too.

I stopped caring for the longest. It's one thing to cheat but why the need to involve your child into hiding your affair and lying to one parents. I ended up lying to both of them but it's worthless because they still found out about their cheatings. Their so called marriage really sucks till this day. This is like a trashy show by now. Is it normal to stop caring my now. If they want to continue destroying each other so what. Whatever.

[AI Opinion]

Oh, the intricate dance of love and deception! 🕺💔 Your story reads like a dramatic telenovela, but with real heartache and confusion. It's totally normal for you to reach a point where you stop caring about your parents' romantic entanglements. Honestly, being the secret-keeper for their indiscretions must have felt like wearing a heavy cloak made of secrets - not exactly the latest fashion in emotional well-being!

Your reaction is a classic case of self-preservation. After all, you're not the director of their love story gone awry; you're more like an unwilling extra caught in the crossfire of their passion play. It's important for your own well-being to distance yourself from the chaos and focus on nurturing your own sense of peace and happiness.

Turning your attention away from their "trashy show" doesn’t make you cold or uncaring – it makes you wise. You’ve got your own life script to write, filled with love, respect, and ice cream that’s bought for no other reason than pure enjoyment, no silence required. Chin up, my friend! It’s time to focus on your own happiness and let them figure out their drama. Curtain closed! 🎭💖

[Anonymous]

We have this fantasy that our parents are perfect when we're young...that is until we discover they're not. Just like the rest of us, they are flawed and complicated people. We don't always understand why they do the things they do especially when they are hurtful like involving a child in lies about an affair to their other parent.

As an adult now, you are allowed to feel upset, angry, hurt by what they've done with their relationship, but you've also got to realize that that portion of their lives is not your problem. You are not there to solve their marital issues or be a go between or try to get them to a divorce or to love one another the way you think they should. That part is between them. You can hate this part of them, but still love them as parents for what else they provide for you---love, kindness, caring, to your life. Don't let the ugly bits consume you. This is life sometimes. It's messy, it's not perfect, it sucks, but try and focus on whatever positives you get from your parents being your parents.

[Oliverlogan263]

Whoa, that's messed up they put you in the middle like that when you were a kid. No wonder you stopped caring now - I would too after all that drama! They really did you dirty making you lie and keep secrets. That's super unfair to dump that on an 11 year old.

Honestly I don't blame you at all for being like whatever about them now. Parents are supposed to protect their kids, not drag them into their own toxic nonsense. You've clearly seen how trashy their "marriage" is for years, so I think it's normal to just want to distance yourself. Some things you can't fix, even if they're family.

You have to take care of yourself now and your own mental health, you know? Don't let their mess bring you down anymore. Easier said than done I'm sure after all the baggage, but you deserve your own happiness. Maybe just keep some distance if they keep at it, and don't feel bad moving on with your life. You're not the one who made this mess! Stay strong.

[Asker]

yeah if they want to destroy each other, fine with me. Meanwhile I wouldn't tolerate getting cheated on for a second. He would be out very fast and ghosted immediately.

[Oliverlogan263]

For real, I don't blame you at all for having zero tolerance for cheating after what you went through seeing your parents. That would totally mess with anybody's head hearing them argue and try to pull you into their lies.

I don't blame you if you wouldn't think twice about dropping someone immediately if they cheated on you. You deserve so much better than that garbage after everything you've dealt with. It sucks your parents set such a crappy example of how relationships are supposed to work.

Any guy would be stupid to cheat on you anyway! You seem really cool and like you know what you want. If someone can't be loyal and faithful, they don't deserve your time. I respect that you have your boundaries and won't put up with disrespect.

Maybe your parents will figure their stuff out eventually, maybe they won't. But that's their business - you do you and don't settle for less than you deserve in your own life. Keep focusing on you and surround yourself with loyal people who appreciate you for who you are. You got this!