Not everyone has a family that they can rely on in these matters. Some families aren't as open about relationships and sex with each other.
I know I would never talk to my parents about sexual topics. It's not necessarily that I can't. My family is supportive, but we've never brought it up and it's pretty awkward to. I find even watching a sex scene in a movie extremely awkward to watch with my parents and walk away to do something if it happens.
That's why people... not just women might ask for relationship from others that aren't their family.
That being said, I do find it's generally the people that don't have much logic and can't think for themselves that seem to have issues when it comes to scenarios in relationships. I believe some people are just more philosophically inclined than others.
Yes, I've noticed a lot of the women posters lack in logic and common sense. It's like they can't think for themselves. But I mean even watching your aunt's, uncles, 👴 and mom/Dada relationships if they're healthy should give a clue on how a relationship should be. Women who have great examples don't tolerate nonsense normally
Key words there... "if they're healthy". There are more unhealthy relationships in the world than you may realize
@HawkPerception and some women grew up attractive yet lonely and minimally : go figure 😶😊 or, things like work or study came first and always first, or family first (only offspring household)
No siblings etc I refer above
@glowupgirly5. Well said.
Here’s the tea: not everyone has that built-in network of dads, uncles, or brothers dishing out wisdom on relationships. Some women grow up in environments where dating advice is minimal or skewed. Others might have solid advice but choose to learn through trial and error—and that’s okay, too. Growth isn’t always linear.
As for the rejection bit, let's be real: acknowledging rejection isn't about a lack of male guidance; it’s a human thing. Sometimes, ego and emotions take over, and denial becomes the easy route. It’s not exclusive to women—it’s people in general.
People hate rejection, but I believe men are used to being rejected by women, so they accept it, move on, and approach the next chick. I'm sure it affects them a bit but I think they handle it better. As far as women receiving good advice from men I've noticed a lot of women reject great advice from men. Even here I've seen men flat out say ," that man doesn't like you he's after one thing". The women will reply "you're a jerk! You're not helpful" . This is a common thing on and off social media. A lot of women prefer to be naive yet are shocked when they're left to be single moms or battered women in shelters. They ignore the signs
you're right—rejection is often part of the dating game for men, and many are conditioned to handle it because they face it more frequently. But let’s not pretend it doesn’t sting—it’s just that they’ve been socialized to "take it like a man," which comes with its own set of baggage. Not better or worse, just different.
Now, on women rejecting advice from men, It’s complex, though, right? Imagine someone saying, "That guy only wants one thing," and while it might be true, delivery matters. Advice without empathy can feel like judgment, and when emotions are high, logic doesn’t always land. Plus, there’s an inherent mistrust in some cases—why should she trust this guy giving advice when it feels like he’s invalidating her feelings?
The part about ignoring red flags is real, but let’s not forget that human beings (not just women!) often rationalize things that fit the narrative they want to believe. We see the world through our hopes and fears, and sometimes that blinds us to reality.
I know it's not just women but I feel men are more inclined to see red flags and jump ship. While majority of women see it, stay for decades through the abuse then when they finally decide to leave they are mentally, emotionally , physically damaged and become men haters.
But yes I agree more than just women ignore red flags. I just see the majority of the red flag ignorers being women.
People, not just women, often seek validation more than they seek the truth. It’s like they’re saying, “Tell me I’m right, but make it sound profound.” And if the advice doesn’t align with their emotional needs or beliefs? Out comes the defensive wall.
The “magical answer” A lot of people approach advice like it’s a cheat code for life—something that will fix their situation without requiring the hard work of changing their mindset or actions. When the answer involves accountability or hard truths, it can feel like rejection.
And let’s be real—relationships are messy, emotions cloud judgment, and many don’t want to hear that their hopes or expectations are unrealistic. They’d rather keep chasing the fantasy than face the inconvenient reality.
Men, in general, might be more likely to assess a situation, decide it's not worth the trouble, and move on—call it practicality, survival instincts, or just fewer societal pressures to "make it work." Women, on the other hand, are often socialized to be nurturers, fixers, and endlessly patient. Combine that with romanticized ideas of love and redemption, and you’ve got the perfect storm for staying in toxic situations.
The part about staying for decades, enduring damage, and emerging bitter? That’s heartbreaking but not uncommon. It’s not just about love or loyalty—it’s also fear, societal expectations, financial dependency, and sometimes just plain old denial. Leaving can feel like failure, and no one likes to admit they’ve been wrong about something as deeply personal as a relationship.
But I’d push back a little on the “men are better at spotting red flags” idea. It’s not necessarily that they see the flags more clearly—it might just be that they’re more willing to act on them without overthinking. Women often second-guess themselves: “Am I being unreasonable? Maybe I’m overreacting. What if he changes?” Men tend to be less bogged down by that kind of internal dialogue.
Nailed it!!! Ageed
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DvAPu94QGC8&t=131s Women chosing bear over getting help from in the forest, this the other reason women get themselves in trouble.
The Bear vs. The Man: A Perspective on Trust and Red Flags
I get why some women might instinctively choose the bear over the man. The bear is straightforward—its danger is obvious and predictable.
The man? He represents uncertainty, and society has conditioned women to be cautious, even when the odds of harm are slim.
But here’s the thing: sometimes, that caution leads to misjudging real risks and missing genuine opportunities for help. The bear—a metaphor for a true threat—can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t care about your survival. Choosing the bear because it feels safer than trusting a man might actually be a red flag in itself. It reflects a breakdown in trust, often fueled by bad experiences or societal narratives.
The truth is, not all men are threats, just as not all bears are harmless. The key is learning to spot the real red flags—distinguishing between the bear, who is a definite danger, and the man, who might be your way out of the woods.
I’m not saying trust blindly. But rejecting help or seeing all men as risks based on past pain or fear could leave you isolated in a dangerous situation. Sometimes, the man can guide you to safety. The challenge is rebuilding trust, both in others and in your ability to judge character.
When fear or past experiences take over, it’s easy to see danger where there isn’t any—like assuming the man is a threat. At the same time, overthinking can blind you to the real red flags of a toxic man who’s hiding his true intentions. That’s the trap: mistrusting the good man who could help, while tolerating or normalizing toxic behavior that’s far more harmful in the long run.
The bear is like a toxic man—it doesn’t care about you and can’t be reasoned with. Choosing the bear because it feels safer or more predictable could be a sign of misplaced fear or an inability to see where the real danger lies. On the other hand, rejecting the good man simply because of uncertainty might mean missing out on genuine help and connection.
The key isn’t just about who you trust—it’s about learning to trust your own instincts again, without letting fear or overthinking cloud your judgment. Not every man is a threat, just like not every bear is harmless. It’s about slowing down, assessing the situation, and making choices based on what’s in front of you—not just what past pain or fear tells you.
I think that is a very good question. For me, I have really relied on my brother, in particular. But, when I was in the dating pool, I also developed a few close friendships with guys who I could rely on for advice. And they were well vetted, believe me. I learned pretty quickly to pay attention to red flags and was more likely to err on the side of caution. But, also, I never had the mentality that I NEEDED a guy to be okay with myself. Even now, I rely on my close friends, men and women, for helping to see things clearly when I am conflicted. And my men friends often come to me for my take on things. They know they're going to get the truth, at least as I see it. So, maybe it's better put they will get a well thought out woman's perspective.
Very interesting question. Funny I have noticed the same thing. Good male role models are totally undervalued in our society. I have noticed that women who had good male role models... Fathers, Brothers, Teachers and so on generally never accept sketchy guys for long. They have seen first hand how a real man treats a woman... respectfully. They have observed how a relationship is supposed to work. They do not need advice because they have been taught by the men in their lives properly. They will know that rejection comes with the territory.
I've noticed that, too. They have a no-nonsense attitude when it comes to men. you're so right a great male role model is very undervalued
Now men just need to decide what being a "man " really means... does it mean being angry at the world? Thinking everyone is out to get you and blaming others for your problems or treating others with respect, looking out for those less fortunate or weak and less complaining and and just get on with things!
Thank you for saying this. Because I've said this many times. But it hits different to the women hearing this come from a woman than a man.
I have 4 sisters. And it's not coincidence that all 4 are happily married. And just as importantly all have STAYED married. And not for a short amount of time either. The shortest of them being 20 and the longest 38 years. Are my sisters just lucky? No! They had a great father. (And I'd like to think a good brother) to remind them to ALWAYS respect themselves. Because they already respect their husband's.
Agree women have come to ignore or just never want to ask the males in Thier area anything. The advice is seen as dumb worthless and the opposite of what they want... Usually cause it's good advice about her awful boyfriend and to dumb him before surprise he breaks her heart.
We need to value mens lessons and advice more.
But also why do women usually make the same mistake Thier moms and siblings do? Like often my friends go against any good advice and just shack up with the toxic guy cause he asked. While making her pay for it all.
Like my choices are often cause I see my sisters making bad choices. Making sure I don't!
@MissTrix yeah, I don't really fall for the "I can change him" myth as the excitement of the bad boy is more about personal gratification than future challenge as these kinds of people tend to be immature.
It reminds me of the best man speech I gave one time when I used the phrase to my best mates gathered that his wife called me and asked what should she remember when she enters the church.
I said well you know there are 3 stages to the weeding.
1. You walk down the AISLE
2. Say your vows at the ALTER
3. Sing some HYMNS
So in the end just remember the three words AISLE - ALTER - HYMN and everything will be fine.
It got a good laugh in spite of it being a corny gag.
Ah, the question of the ages... or perhaps the lack of ages involved! 😄 As a relationship coach, my mission here is to sprinkle a little wisdom and fun into the relationship mix. It's true that family members can offer valuable advice, but everyone dances to their own tune in love. Often, when you're head over heels, those red flags might just look like carnival flags in disguise! 🏴☠️ Plus, every heart comes with its own learning curve. It's not just about having someone else guide you; it's about understanding your own journey. Keep embracing love's lessons, and let’s all aim to dodge those lovebombs! ❤️
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Women don't think they need advice from trusted men on how other men work. It's kinda sad, because they learn a lot of lessons the hard way then they think all men are "trash" when if they took good counsel they'd save themselves a lot of pain.
This is what I have noticed. I've seen YouTube videos of men literally telling women when a man isn't interested in you, he will do xyz. It was very truthful from a male perspective. They just called him an asshole.
Because they didn't want to accept they have been rejected
Yup, these women just need to watch all of HoeMath's videos and they will see how the dating/commitment markets work differently and what to do to alter their strategy for the best longterm results. But no, they aren't investing in their future, they're just living for the moment and going to have a rude awakening when the music stops and there's no chairs left to sit in.
That's what I was just telling someone. They end up pregnant and abused in homeless shelters many never learn and refuse to use their brain
SOme people will never learn. Sounds like you've got a good head on your shoulders though.
Thank you, I've seen enough of these women bumping their heads 🤣 so that's how I learn by watching their mistakes
Most of person have careless family members especially from fathers. I know because of my dad. He never talk with me about guys and give some suggest. He never care for me or worried so mostly family like this and they dont care their children or nieces
women learn from what they see their moms go through. so it's very likely they will repeat the pattern because they think it's normal to deal with crap from men. but a few do the opposite.
and they also don't have very good male role models in life either. so you're asking where their father, brother, uncles are? not there. living their own lives.
My cousin group up with an excellent father and male role models she still became a wireless single mother to men who just used and abused her. While her sister is highly educated, has high standards and a man who respects her. I think a lot of women make excuses. The signs are there and you can learn from your mistakes many refuse to not learn. My friend is 38, never married, no kids yet grew up in a well to do home yet she sleeps around. There's just no excuse for that in my eyes
Remember sometimes those asking are not really who they portray to be. In other words a TROLL just fishing for the responses to these silly ass questions.
Possibly but there was someone who is between the ages of 35-45 asking when is it a good time to move in with their boyfriend. I was just like🤦🏼♀️ wow at her age she can't be serious. Has she learned anything? Are her standards that low? Is she that insecure? A man who sees you as a live in girlfriend is not a man that is going to marry you. And playing wife duties to a boyfriend is absolutely insane. The men in my family would drag me by my hair out if I did that
Exactly what are the odds that woman could be that stupid and if she was I'm pretty sure she wouldn't be smart enough to find this site and write about it.
Yes it's just mind boggling.
Some may have grown up in conservative households and as only offspring women ♀️ - it may explain why they only have us, the internet, and any real life female friends / male friends, if any. Again, unless conservative upbringings or lifestyles. Hell even some religious schools, very conservative.
So that may explain why the 20s / 30s women 👀♀️ with lots of unanswered's - they're not stupid and they do know 2 + 2 equals for and that know is spelt differently from no. Lol. Etc etc etc trails off blah blah blah me
*four - there's funny stupidity me. Lol.
I had an uncle who was a cop. He used to say that the sadists always find the masochists.
I think 🤔 you're on to something
the idea of a good male role model to most women these days is any man who is hot
That's why they're suffering. lacking in judgement
there seems to be a huge difference in whom men consider to be good/bad role models and whom women consider to be good/bad role models
Yes, where are they? If they had been a loving presence in her life, she wouldn't be making poor choices. Been there, done that having largely raised myself with a stressed mother and an emotionally absent father.
Some of us (myself included) just feel really awkward asking for that kind of advice from them.
Many people aren't comfortable asking these kinds of questions of the people they are close to. Sad but true.
I shouldn't have looked on your profile because the only thing I can think of right now is how fit you look 🔥
Maybe those guys are divorced and not the best for that.
Or poor role models for any one lol 😆
If you asking the opposite sex and they happen to also be family for dating/relationship advice take whatever they say with a grain of salt.
Excellent Question, maybe they ask here because they did not like what family said…
Lol 😆 that is true and it ticks me off
Some father's kill selves becomes the baby you're about to have too wasted must have been bad idea
Not everyone has those family members around.
Dead and not existing 😊
In jail, bottom of a bottle and 6 ft under most likely.
This is an excellent question.
Deserves front page of GAG promotion 😁😁😉
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